The Jargon File - Eric S. Raymond (best books for 8th graders .txt) 📗
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cards in the air, picking them up at random, and then testing whether
they are in order. It serves as a sort of canonical example of
awfulness. Looking at a program and seeing a dumb algorithm, one might
say "Oh, I see, this program uses bogo-sort." Esp. appropriate for
algorithms with factorial or super-exponential running time in the
average case and probabilistically infinite worst-case running time.
Compare [1677]bogus, [1678]brute force, [1679]lasherism.
A spectacular variant of bogo-sort has been proposed which has the
interesting property that, if the Many Worlds interpretation of
quantum mechanics is true, it can sort an arbitrarily large array in
constant time. (In the Many-Worlds model, the result of any quantum
action is to split the universe-before into a sheaf of
universes-after, one for each possible way the state vector can
collapse; in any one of the universes-after the result appears
random.) The steps are: 1. Permute the array randomly using a quantum
process, 2. If the array is not sorted, destroy the universe.
Implementation of step 2 is left as an exercise for the reader.
Node:bogometer, Next:[1680]BogoMIPS, Previous:[1681]bogo-sort,
Up:[1682]= B =
bogometer /boh-gom'-*t-er/ n.
A notional instrument for measuring [1683]bogosity. Compare the
[1684]Troll-O-Meter and the `wankometer' described in the [1685]wank
entry; see also [1686]bogus.
Node:BogoMIPS, Next:[1687]bogon, Previous:[1688]bogometer, Up:[1689]=
B =
BogoMIPS /bo'go-mips/ n.
The number of million times a second a processor can do absolutely
nothing. The [1690]Linux OS measures BogoMIPS at startup in order to
calibrate some soft timing loops that will be used later on; details
at [1691]the BogoMIPS mini-HOWTO. The name Linus chose, of course, is
an ironic comment on the uselessness of all other [1692]MIPS figures.
Node:bogon, Next:[1693]bogon filter, Previous:[1694]BogoMIPS,
Up:[1695]= B =
bogon /boh'gon/ n.
[very common; by analogy with proton/electron/neutron, but doubtless
reinforced after 1980 by the similarity to Douglas Adams's `Vogons';
see the [1696]Bibliography in Appendix C and note that Arthur Dent
actually mispronounces Vogons' asBogons' at one point] 1. The
elementary particle of bogosity (see [1697]quantum bogodynamics). For
instance, "the Ethernet is emitting bogons again" means that it is
broken or acting in an erratic or bogus fashion. 2. A query packet
sent from a TCP/IP domain resolver to a root server, having the reply
bit set instead of the query bit. 3. Any bogus or incorrectly formed
packet sent on a network. 4. By synecdoche, used to refer to any bogus
thing, as in "I'd like to go to lunch with you but I've got to go to
the weekly staff bogon". 5. A person who is bogus or who says bogus
things. This was historically the original usage, but has been
overtaken by its derivative senses 1-4. See also [1698]bogosity,
[1699]bogus; compare [1700]psyton, [1701]fat electrons, [1702]magic
smoke.
The bogon has become the type case for a whole bestiary of nonce
particle names, including the clutron' orcluon' (indivisible
particle of cluefulness, obviously the antiparticle of the bogon) and
the futon (elementary particle of [1703]randomness, or sometimes of
lameness). These are not so much live usages in themselves as examples
of a live meta-usage: that is, it has become a standard joke or
linguistic maneuver to "explain" otherwise mysterious circumstances by
inventing nonce particle names. And these imply nonce particle
theories, with all their dignity or lack thereof (we might note
parenthetically that this is a generalization from "(bogus particle)
theories" to "bogus (particle theories)"!). Perhaps such particles are
the modern-day equivalents of trolls and wood-nymphs as standard
starting-points around which to construct explanatory myths. Of
course, playing on an existing word (as in the `futon') yields
additional flavor. Compare [1704]magic smoke.
Node:bogon filter, Next:[1705]bogon flux, Previous:[1706]bogon,
Up:[1707]= B =
bogon filter /boh'gon fil'tr/ n.
Any device, software or hardware, that limits or suppresses the flow
and/or emission of bogons. "Engineering hacked a bogon filter between
the Cray and the VAXen, and now we're getting fewer dropped packets."
See also [1708]bogosity, [1709]bogus.
Node:bogon flux, Next:[1710]bogosity, Previous:[1711]bogon filter,
Up:[1712]= B =
bogon flux /boh'gon fluhks/ n.
A measure of a supposed field of [1713]bogosity emitted by a speaker,
measured by a [1714]bogometer; as a speaker starts to wander into
increasing bogosity a listener might say "Warning, warning, bogon flux
is rising". See [1715]quantum bogodynamics.
Node:bogosity, Next:[1716]bogotify, Previous:[1717]bogon flux,
Up:[1718]= B =
bogosity /boh-go's*-tee/ n.
[orig. CMU, now very common] The degree to which something is[1719]bogus. Bogosity is measured with a [1720]bogometer; in a
seminar, when a speaker says something bogus, a listener might raise
his hand and say "My bogometer just triggered". More extremely, "You
just pinned my bogometer" means you just said or did something so
outrageously bogus that it is off the scale, pinning the bogometer
needle at the highest possible reading (one might also say "You just
redlined my bogometer"). The agreed-upon unit of bogosity is the
[1721]microLenat. 2. The potential field generated by a [1722]bogon
flux; see [1723]quantum bogodynamics. See also [1724]bogon flux,
[1725]bogon filter, [1726]bogus.
Node:bogotify, Next:[1727]bogue out, Previous:[1728]bogosity,
Up:[1729]= B =
bogotify /boh-go't*-fi:/ vt.
To make or become bogus. A program that has been changed so many times
as to become completely disorganized has become bogotified. If you
tighten a nut too hard and strip the threads on the bolt, the bolt has
become bogotified and you had better not use it any more. This coinage
led to the notional autobogotiphobia' defined asthe fear of
becoming bogotified'; but is not clear that the latter has ever been
`live' jargon rather than a self-conscious joke in jargon about
jargon. See also [1730]bogosity, [1731]bogus.
Node:bogue out, Next:[1732]bogus, Previous:[1733]bogotify, Up:[1734]=
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bogue out /bohg owt/ vi.
To become bogus, suddenly and unexpectedly. "His talk was relatively
sane until somebody asked him a trick question; then he bogued out and
did nothing but [1735]flame afterwards." See also [1736]bogosity,
[1737]bogus.
Node:bogus, Next:[1738]Bohr bug, Previous:[1739]bogue out, Up:[1740]=
B =
bogus adj.
Non-functional. "Your patches are bogus." 2. Useless. "OPCON is abogus program." 3. False. "Your arguments are bogus." 4. Incorrect.
"That algorithm is bogus." 5. Unbelievable. "You claim to have solved
the halting problem for Turing Machines? That's totally bogus." 6.
Silly. "Stop writing those bogus sagas."
Astrology is bogus. So is a bolt that is obviously about to break. So
is someone who makes blatantly false claims to have solved a
scientific problem. (This word seems to have some, but not all, of the
connotations of [1741]random -- mostly the negative ones.)
It is claimed that `bogus' was originally used in the hackish sense at
Princeton in the late 1960s. It was spread to CMU and Yale by Michael
Shamos, a migratory Princeton alumnus. A glossary of bogus words was
compiled at Yale when the word was first popularized there about
1975-76. These coinages spread into hackerdom from CMU and MIT. Most
of them remained wordplay objects rather than actual vocabulary items
or live metaphors. Examples: `amboguous' (having multiple bogus
interpretations); `bogotissimo' (in a gloriously bogus manner);
`bogotophile' (one who is pathologically fascinated by the bogus);
`paleobogology' (the study of primeval bogosity).
Some bogowords, however, obtained sufficient live currency to be
listed elsewhere in this lexicon; see [1742]bogometer, [1743]bogon,
[1744]bogotify, and [1745]quantum bogodynamics and the related but
unlisted [1746]Dr. Fred Mbogo.
By the early 1980s `bogus' was also current in something like hacker
usage sense in West Coast teen slang, and it had gone mainstream by
A correspondent from Cambridge reports, by contrast, that theseuses of `bogus' grate on British nerves; in Britain the word means,
rather specifically, `counterfeit', as in "a bogus 10-pound note".
Node:Bohr bug, Next:[1747]boink, Previous:[1748]bogus, Up:[1749]= B =
Bohr bug /bohr buhg/ n.
[from quantum physics] A repeatable [1750]bug; one that manifests
reliably under a possibly unknown but well-defined set of conditions.
Antonym of [1751]heisenbug; see also [1752]mandelbug,
[1753]schroedinbug.
Node:boink, Next:[1754]bomb, Previous:[1755]Bohr bug, Up:[1756]= B =
boink /boynk/
[Usenet: variously ascribed to the TV series "Cheers" "Moonlighting",
and "Soap"] 1. v. To have sex with; compare [1757]bounce, sense 3.
(This is mainstream slang.) In Commonwealth hackish the variant `bonk'
is more common. 2. n. After the original Peter Korn `Boinkon'
[1758]Usenet parties, used for almost any net social gathering, e.g.,
Miniboink, a small boink held by Nancy Gillett in 1988; Minniboink, a
Boinkcon in Minnesota in 1989; Humpdayboinks, Wednesday get-togethers
held in the San Francisco Bay Area. Compare [1759]@-party. 3. Var of
`bonk'; see [1760]bonk/oif.
Node:bomb, Next:[1761]bondage-and-discipline language,
Previous:[1762]boink, Up:[1763]= B =
bomb
v. General synonym for [1764]crash (sense 1) except that it is notused as a noun; esp. used of software or OS failures. "Don't run
Empire with less than 32K stack, it'll bomb." 2. n.,v. Atari ST and
Macintosh equivalents of a Unix `panic' or Amiga [1765]guru
meditation, in which icons of little black-powder bombs or mushroom
clouds are displayed, indicating that the system has died. On the Mac,
this may be accompanied by a decimal (or occasionally hexadecimal)
number indicating what went wrong, similar to the Amiga [1766]guru
meditation number. [1767]MS-DOS machines tend to get [1768]locked up
in this situation.
Node:bondage-and-discipline language, Next:[1769]bonk/oif,
Previous:[1770]bomb, Up:[1771]= B =
bondage-and-discipline language n.
A language (such as [1772]Pascal, [1773]Ada, APL, or Prolog) that,
though ostensibly general-purpose, is designed so as to enforce an
author's theory of `right programming' even though said theory is
demonstrably inadequate for systems hacking or even vanilla
general-purpose programming. Often abbreviated `B&D'; thus, one may
speak of things "having the B&D nature". See [1774]Pascal; oppose
[1775]languages of choice.
Node:bonk/oif, Next:[1776]book titles,
Previous:[1777]bondage-and-discipline language, Up:[1778]= B =
bonk/oif /bonk/, /oyf/ interj.
In the U.S. [1779]MUD community, it has become traditional to express
pique or censure by `bonking' the offending person. Convention holds
that one should acknowledge a bonk by saying `oif!' and there is a
myth to the effect that failing to do so upsets the cosmic bonk/oif
balance, causing much trouble in the universe. Some MUDs have
implemented special commands for bonking and oifing. Note: in parts of
the U.K. `bonk' is a sexually loaded slang term; care is advised in
transatlantic conversations (see [1780]boink). Commonwealth hackers
report a similar convention involving the `fish/bang' balance. See
also [1781]talk mode.
Node:book titles, Next:[1782]boot, Previous:[1783]bonk/oif, Up:[1784]=
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book titles
There is a tradition in hackerdom of informally tagging important
textbooks and standards documents with the dominant color of their
covers or with some other conspicuous feature of the cover. Many of
these are described in this lexicon under their own entries. See
[1785]Aluminum Book, [1786]Blue Book, [1787]Camel Book,
[1788]Cinderella Book, [1789]Devil Book, [1790]Dragon Book,
[1791]Green Book, [1792]Orange Book, [1793]Purple Book, [1794]Red
Book, [1795]Silver Book, [1796]White Book, [1797]Wizard Book,
[1798]Yellow Book, and [1799]bible; see also [1800]rainbow series.
Since about 1983 this tradition has gotten a boost from the popular
O'Reilly and Associates line of technical books, which usually feature
some kind of exotic animal on the cover.
Node:boot, Next:[1801]Borg, Previous:[1802]book titles, Up:[1803]= B =
boot v.,n.
[techspeak; from `by one's bootstraps'] To load and initialize the
operating system on a machine. This usage is no longer jargon (having
passed into techspeak) but has given rise to some derivatives that are
still jargon.
The derivative `reboot' implies that the machine hasn't been down for
long, or that the boot is a [1804]bounce (sense 4) intended to clear
some state of [1805]wedgitude. This is sometimes used of human thought
processes, as in the following exchange: "You've lost me." "OK,
reboot. Here's the theory...."
This term is also found in the variants `cold boot' (from power-off
condition) and `warm boot' (with the CPU and all devices already
powered up, as after a hardware reset or software crash).
Another variant: `soft boot', reinitialization of only part of a
system, under control of other software still running: "If you're
running the [1806]mess-dos emulator, control-alt-insert will cause a
soft-boot of the emulator, while leaving the rest of the system
running."
Opposed to this there is `hard boot', which connotes hostility towards
or frustration with the machine being booted: "I'll have to hard-boot
this losing Sun." "I recommend booting it
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