The 'Mind the Paint' Girl - Arthur Wing Pinero (free children's online books TXT) š
- Author: Arthur Wing Pinero
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Jeyes.
After an expressive glance at Farncombe. An odd question, in the circumstances.
Lily.
Answer me!
Jeyes.
Keeping an eye on you.
Lily.
Spying on me!
Jeyes.
On youā jerking his head towards Farncombe andāā
Lily.
How dare you!
Jeyes.
Iāve been at it all night.
Lily.
All night!
Jeyes.
Yes; I was in the theatre while you were supping and dancing.
Lily.
You were!
Jeyes.
I meant to be there. You did your best to stop itāā
Lily.
Thatās a lie!
Jeyes.
So that you could enjoy yourself thoroughlyā glancing at Farncombe again withāā
Lily.
A lie!
Jeyes.
I didnāt leave till past three. You andā with another motion of the head towards Farncombe had just had your fifth dance together, and they were hauling you round the building.
Lily.
Where were you? Whoāā?
Jeyes.
Excuse me; thatās my business. Then I went back to Jermyn Street, and it suddenly struck me Iād like to see how your escort was composed.
Lily.
Youāve been watching outside?
Jeyes.
Since a quarter-to-fourāunder the portico at the corner.
Lily.
Contemptuously. Youāā!
Jeyes.
Yes, but, by God, I wasnāt quite prepared for this!
Lily.
This!
Jeyes.
Cramming his cap into his overcoat-pocket and coming to Farncombe. What the hellās your game? Youāve got some accommodating friends, both of you, in that blackguard Roper and that slut Jimmie Birch!
Lily.
Ohā! Approaching Jeyes with clenched fists. Ah, you curāā!
Farncombe.
Holding up his hand to her appealingly. Miss Parradellāā!
Lily.
To Jeyes. You cur! Motherās been told that Lord Farncombeās with me. I sent Jimmie up to tell her.
Jeyes.
Where is your mother?
Lily.
In bed, of course.
Jeyes.
Snoring! Ha, ha, ha! Faugh, thereās an ugly name, my girl, for such mothers as yours!
Lily.
Ahā! Raising her fist. Ah-h-h-hāā!
Farncombe.
Miss Parradellāā!
Lily.
Restraining herself with difficulty and pacing the room. Oh, the cur! The cur! The cur!
Farncombe.
To Jeyes, looking at him steadily. Captain Jeyesāā
Lily.
The low cur!
Farncombe.
Captain Jeyes, do you happen to know where I lodge?
Jeyes.
No; I donāt know where your sty is.
Farncombe.
St. Jamesās Placeāforty-seven. I shall be in at twelve oāclock. Picking up his hat and overcoat. From the tone this gentleman adopts, Miss Parradell, I assume that he considers himself entitled to concern himself in your affairs. Moving over to the left where Lily joins him. Perhaps it will make it easier for you if Iāā
Lily.
Clutching his arm. Ah, Iām so indignant, Eddie! IāIāIāā!
Jeyes.
Eddie! Eddie!
Lily.
Turning upon Jeyes in a fury. Yes, you cadāEddie, Eddie, Eddie! You cad! You sneak! You idler! You waster! Iāve stood it long enough. This is the last straw! Iāve done with you! Iām sick to death of you! How Iāve tolerated you all these years is a mystery to me! After this, get out of my sight and never show yourself to me again!
Jeyes.
Grasping her wrist, fiercely. Lilyāā!
Lily.
Wrenching herself free. What! Losing control over herself utterly. Youāll spy on me, will you, you shabby loafer! Youāll peep at me while Iām eating my supper, and count the dances I choose to give that boy over there, will you! And then youāll break into my house, and insult my friends behind their backs, and insinuate foul things against my poor old motherāyou damned coward!āand against me, pointing to Farncombe and him! Why, youāre not fit to black his boots, and you never wereāneverāyouāyouāyou scum! Here! Taking Farncombeās note from her bosom and thrusting it at Jeyes. Read that! Sitting in the arm-chair by the centre table. Read it! Read it! Read it! Jeyes reads to himself. Out loud!
Jeyes.
Mumbling. āDear Miss Parradell. Will you allow meāā?ā
Lily.
Louder!
Jeyes.
āWill you allow me to remain behind for a few minutes with Miss Jimmie after the others have gone? I know I am presuming a lot, but I cannot leave you till I have asked you the most important question a man can put to a woman. Farncombe.ā
Lily.
Breathless. Written hereāon my note-paperāwhile I was out of the room! It came on me like a thunder-clap! Ah! Ah! Ah! Jeyes sits upon the settee, staring at the carpet. And Morrie Cooling and Lal will tell you that I hadnāt a notion that Lord Farncombe was to be at the supper last night, or any of the boys; not a notion. I blackguarded āem both for deceiving me, and causing me to deceive you. Taking the scent-atomizer from the table and spraying her face with it. Now! What have you to say now! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Jeyes.
Huskily. Whyāwhy the devil did you let Jimmie go? Why did you let her go? It was knowing that you and Farncombe were alone thatāthat made meāā
Lily.
Oh, if Iād suspected that a private detective was hovering around, Iād have kept the whole lot of my friends! As it was, Jimmie was looking dead, andā! in disdain. Pah!
There is a pause and then Jeyes sits upright and draws his hand wearily across his eyes.
Jeyes.
To Lily. Well, IāI beg your pardon. Lily continues to spray herself energetically. Iām not so completely scum as not to see that I ought to beg your pardon. Humbly. I beg your pardon.
Lily.
Softening by degrees. Youāyou drive me mad sometimesāpositively frantic!
Jeyes.
Partly to himself. Mad! To Farncombe. And you, FarncombeāI hope youāll accept my apologies. I offer them unreservedly.
Farncombe bows, somewhat stiffly.
Lily.
To Jeyes, protruding her lower lip. IāI didnāt mean half I said, Nicko; I didnāt mean half of it. Eyeing Farncombe askance as she replaces the atomizer. And IāIām ashamed of myself for losing my self-control as I did. There is another pause and then Jeyes gets to his feet and silently returns the note to Lily. She looks up at him piteously and puts the note back into her bosom. Then he takes out his key-ring, removes the latch key from it, and throws the key on to the table. Having done this, he drags his cap from his pocket and makes for the door on the left. As he passes Lily, she rises and gently plucks at his sleeve. NickoāNickoāā
Jeyes.
In a thick voice. Eh?
Lily.
Wonāt youāwonāt you give Lord Farncombeāsome explanationāā?
Jeyes.
Explanationāā?
Lily.
Of the sort of terms weāve been on, you and I, Heāhe must beārather puzzledā turning away to the table. Oh, itās due to you as well as to me!
Jeyes.
Dully. Just as you please. With a hard laugh. Ho, ho! Yes, perhaps it is due to me that he should learn a little more about me than heās been able to gather from personal observationāand from your eloquent but summary description. Under his breath, screwing up his cap. Idlerāwasterāloaferāā!
Lily.
Penitently. Nicko!
Jeyes.
To Farncombe, quietly. Oh, itās a true bill, Farncombe. And yet, a very few years backāshe wonāt dispute itāI was one of the smartest chaps going, good at my job, with prospects as rosy as any manās in my regiment. There wasnāt a cloud the size of your hand, apparently, in my particular bit of sky at the time I speak of; not a speck! Then I met this young lady, andā pointing to the box-ottoman well, since weāre in for itāā!
Farncombe.
Oh, Captain Jeyesāā
Jeyes.
No, no; she wishes you to understand the exact nature of the friendship between her and me. Iām obeying instructions. Farncombe sits on the ottoman, nursing his hat and overcoat. Then Jeyes sits in the arm-chair by the centre table, first turning the chair so that it faces Farncombe. Farncombe, I was under thirty, and still a subaltern, when I made Miss Parradellās acquaintance. Like most of my pals, I was spending my nights, whenever I could get away from Aldershot, in the stalls at the Pandoraāmuch the same as youāve been doing recently, and as a certain class of young manāll go on doing as long as the Pandora, and similar shops, continue to flourish. Ha! How honoured we felt, we men, in those days, at knowing some of the Pandora girls, and having the privilege of supping āem and standing āem dinner on Sunday evenings! If theyād been royal princesses we couldnāt have been more elated. With a gesture. Donāt jump at conclusions. It generally ended there, or with our running into debt at a jewellerās. We were young, they were beautifulāor we thought āem so; but the majority of us werenāt vicious, any more than the majority of the girls wereāthough many of āem were mighty calculating. It would have been better for us men if all the girls had been wicked; the glamour, the infatuation, the folly, would have been sooner over, and one of us at least would have had a different tale to tell.
Jeyes pauses, gazing at the floor, Farncombe moves impatiently on the ottoman and Lily seats herself upon the settee.
Lily.
Plaintively. NickoāNickoāI merely wanted you toāā
Jeyes.
Rousing himself and speaking to Lily over his shoulder. Who was it introduced us?
Lily.
Miss Du CaneāAggie Du Cane.
Jeyes.
Agnes Du Cane. Sheās gone under. To Lily. Outside Buckleyās oyster-bar, wasnāt it?
Lily.
Not outside; in the parlour.
Jeyes.
To Farncombe. Lily had only lately come to the Pandoraāa pale-faced slip of a thing. To Lily. Eighteen, werenāt you?
Lily.
Nodding. Eighteen.
Jeyes.
I confess I wasnāt overwhelmingly attracted by her at first; she was so unlike the rest. Laughing bitterly. Ha, ha, ha!
Lily.
Weakly. Ha, ha, ha! Wasnāt I dowdy!
Jeyes.
But she was humble, and naĆÆve, and confiding; and my vanity was tickled by her delight at the little treats I gave her, and by her gratitude for a tuppeny-haāpenny present or two. Nobody, I believe, with any pretensions to being a gentleman, had paid her much attention before I arrived on the scene.
Lily.
In a murmur. No; nobody.
Jeyes.
I didnāt find out that I was in love with herāyou guess itās a love story, donāt you?āā
Farncombe.
Delicately. My dear Captain Jeyesāā
Jeyes.
I didnāt find out that I was neck and heels in love with her until nearly a year afterwards, when my regiment went to the Curragh. That did itāseparation! What I suffered in that hole, thinking of her, starving for her! In less than three months I was in London again, on leave, and in my old stall at the Pandora. But even then, Farncombe, I hadnāt your pluck.
Farncombe.
Pluck?
Jeyes.
The pluck to snap my fingers at the world and propose marriage to a Pandora girl. Besides, my mother was alive then, andā abruptly, with a wild look would you like to know what she
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