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it too looked like a diary entry.



Vincent has finally caught on, not to my work of course, but to my lies. Though it broke my heart in two, I suggested a divorce. He deserves better than this. Better than me. I wish it didn’t have to be this way, but I think this is the easiest route for everyone. I hope he will understand with time, and I hope Summer will also. My dear Summer, oh how I miss her! I just wish I could spend one night with her laying in my arms, like she did when she was a child. At least that way I would stop worrying about her. I’m always worrying…All I do is worry…
The ink trailed off and again and I felt a tear slide down my cheek. I miss you too mom! I said all feelings of the divorce forgotten. “Why did you lie to Daddy?” I asked her sleeping form. “Why?” I whispered again to myself. If you still love him, why lie? I didn’t understand my mother’s choices and hope the last paper would explain more. I held it up; it was different from the other, in a to-do list form.



1.) Mail divorce papers to Vincent
2.) Call Summer, apologize
3.) Call for update


I looked at the page for a few seconds longer. Apologize? For the divorce, or something else? I thought silently as I quietly stuffed the papers back into the drawer. Shutting it softly, I admired how relaxed my mother looked while she slept. It was an expression of hers that I’d never seen. Her lips were curved up in a slight smile and her hands reached out for a form that wasn’t there.

“Vincent?’ she said it so soft that I almost thought I’d imagined it until she whispered it again, “Vincent? Where are you? Why have you left me?” A lone tear rolled down her cheek and landed onto her pillow. “Oh Mom, just call it off,” I whispered then an idea struck me. I opened the drawer and found the to-do list again. Picking up a pencil, I made my edits then laid back down. It now read:



1.) Make up with Vincent
2.) Call Summer, Catch up
3.) Call for an update

I let out a sigh as I stared at my handy work and gave a smile. I wonder what mom will think about when she finds this. My mom rolled over and again then, ever so slowly, she began to wake up. Seeing her beginning to sit up and rub her eyes, I let out a soft “Eek!” and quickly pictured my old houses garden again.

After a few seconds of waiting I disappeared then reappeared in my small, pathetic garden. I smiled, breathing in the scent of the flowers and went to lie down at my usual spot. As I walked out to the old wooden bench I saw a note was lying on top of it. Sighing out of exhaustion, I reached down and picked it up.



A poem for Summer,
You cannot run forever,
Think you can hide from me?
How un-clever!
Think I can’t see?
You’re dumb as ever.
It’s been awhile since I said hi,
So tell me Summer, are you ready to die?

I dropped the note with a gasp. Who wrote that? I thought to myself as I looked around the garden. Was it ‘the man’? I asked, hoping that thinking of him wouldn’t summon his presence. I sighed; I’ll just think about it in the morning, I thought glumly as I lay down on the rotting wooden bench. Soon after my head hit the rotting wood, the garden faded from around me and my dream world slipped away, leaving me falling once more, into a world of darkness.




Chapter 35



I woke up soaked in sweat, my light blonde hair wet, and clinging to my damp forehead. I kept taking trying to take deep breaths, which instead came out in short gasps, to fill my lungs and slow my racing heart. Black spots kept filling my vision whenever I tried to open my eyes and the seemed to be spinning around me. I’m having a panic attack,

stating this fact to myself actually seemed to calm me down.

At last, I could breathe evenly again. I used my blankets to wipe most of the sweat from my face, then got down off my bunk and walked over to my mirror. All of this trouble over a silly note?

I tried to play it off as nothing, but in reality just thinking about that poem made the hairs on my back stand on end.

I tore myself away from my pale, shaken reflection and walked over to my desk to check my clock. Well, at least I woke up on time,

I thought to myself, that gives me a whole hour to get ready!

Instantly in a brighter mood, I snatched up my clothes and towel then saw Sierra’s sleeping form still lying in her bed. I tiptoed over to the side of her bed and gave her shoulder a light shake.

“Huh?” she asked drowsily, sitting up slowly and running a hand through her short, choppy brown hair.

“Time for school,” I replied then ran off to our bathroom to shower.

I took longer than usual for my shower, letting the steam and heat relax my overly tense muscles. As the warm water droplets ran down my back and into the drain, I let the memories of last night’s dream go with it. I ran my hands through my sopping, wet hair and ran a washcloth over my face. A loud bang of the bathroom door pulled me out of my soapy relaxation. I rinsed off, and then stuck my head out around the shower curtain.

“Yes?” I asked smothering my voice with fake annoyance.

“Hurry up!” Sierra shouted in a mock angry voice, and I heard her let out a loud giggle. “You’re wasting all the hot water!” she called and I rolled my eyes.

“Oh relax; I’m getting out as we speak!” I yelled back as I shut off the running water and stepped out onto the cool, tile floor.

I plucked my towel up, off of the bathroom counter, and wrapped it around my body. Then, after wringing out my hair, I snatched up that hair dryer and a spare brush, and opened up the door. “Bathroom’s all yours,” I replied and Sierra gave me a smile.

“Thanks S.” I gave her a nod before she shut the door, then walked over and began blowing my hair dry in our tiny, one person mirror.

30 minutes later, my light blonde hair was perfectly smooth and flowing nicely over my small shoulders. I was dressed in mini skirt and a tank top and wore converse as my shoes. Sierra picked up her back pack off of her bed and gave me a casual wave over her shoulder as she headed for the door. “We’d better head out, or we might be late.” I gave her a nod and after picking up my own backpack, followed her out, into the hall.

After that, my school seemed to fly by, and before I knew it, I was standing in the lunch line waiting for my food. The cafeteria lady dumped something unrecognizable onto my plate and urged me forward. Sighing, I picked up my tray and threw it into the nearest trash bin, grabbing a bag of chips instead. With my chips and vitamin water in hand, I walked over and plopped down next to Kyle. Today, he was joined by Sierra and Brady, a guy who Sierra met in her tech class and has had a huge crush on since she first saw him.

“Oh, hey honey,” Kyle said getting up and pulling my chair out for me.

“Aw, you didn’t have to do that,” I said and blushed as I took my seat.

“So are you excited for tonight?” Kyle asked reaching under the table and giving my thigh a squeeze.

I jumped and let out a nervous giggle, “Yeah, of course.” Eager to get off the topic, I turned towards Sierra and gave her an encouraging smile. “So how was tech?” She looked up from her food and gave me a shrug.

“Same as usual.” I bit my lip and turned towards Brady.

“So, I heard you’re on yearbook committee this year. Is it fun?” He looked up at me through his mess of black hair, a sarcastic smiling playing on his lips.

“I quit two years ago,” he replied and I let out a frustrated sigh.

“Looks like I have some catching up to do,” I joked, trying to cover up my sigh.

It must not have worked because Kyle turned and faced me, “Everything okay babe?” I smiled and gave him quick nod.

He stared at me for a while longer then averted his eyes back to his food. Across the cafeteria, I saw Stephanie enter, and I slowly go up to go talk to her.

“Honey, where are you going?” Kyle asked giving me a confused look. Sierra and Brady too looked up me questioningly.

I gave them all a weak smile and said, “Oh, just have some un-finished business to attend to.” I speed walked over to Stephanie in order to catch up to her. When she saw me, she whispered something in Lance’s ear then rose to greet me.

“What the hell do you want?” Wait, did I just hear that wrong?

I thought to myself questioningly. Was she not the girl who was crying last night about having no on?

Stephanie gave me an irritated glare.

“I came over to ask if you wanted to come sit with us,” I replied giving her a smile. She shot daggers at me with her eyes.

“I’d rather get shot in the head multiple times then get caught dead sitting with you losers,” she replied and I could tell her icy exterior was up harder than ever today.

“Is that why you’re acting so strange? Because you have multiple head injuries?” I asked looking up at her with innocent eyes.

“Strange?” she asked her jaw clenched tightly.

“Well, I guess it’s normal behavior for someone who has no one,” I continued and I watched her jaw drop.

“I’d love to challenge you a battle at wits, but it doesn’t feel right attacking someone who’s unarmed,” she replied her bright blues eyes giving me a cold, hard stare.

“Why are you always so sarcastic?” I asked giving her a look of question.

“It’s my body’s natural defense against stupidity,” she replied and I let out a giggle.

“Okay, I definitely didn’t see that one coming.” She remained stone face, and unmoving. “Oh, come on! I’m sure Lance would come, and you could help me pick out my outfit for my date!” I said putting a false pep in my voice and giving her an eager smile. This time, she smiled back. Putting one manicured hand on her skinny hip she leaned in closer to me.

“Pardon me, but you're obviously mistaking me for someone who gives a damn.” She said and I let out an angry sigh.

“What about having no one? Is this how you plan on

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