Socrates - Voltaire (ereader for comics txt) 📗

You are making me too weak. Listen, mustn’t we respect

the will of the dead? Aglaea, your father whom I regarded as the

better part of myself, didn’t he order me to treat you as my own

daughter? I am obeying him. I would be betraying his friendship and

confidence if I did less. I accepted his testament, and I will execute

it. The little that I am giving you is useless to my old age which is

without needs. Finally, as I have a duty to obey my friend, you must

obey your father. It is I who in his sacred name order you not to

overwhelm me with sorrow by refusing me. But retire; I observe

Xantippe. I have my reasons for begging you to avoid her at this time.

 

AGLAEA:

Ah. What cruel orders you give us.

 

(Aglaea and Sophronine exit)

 

XANTIPPE (entering)

Truly, you’ve just made a fine masterpiece! My word, my dear husband,

it’s necessary to prevent you. See, if you please, these stupidities.

I promised Aglaea to the priest Anitus who has much credit among the

great. I promised Sophronine to that big business woman, Drixa who has

great credit among the people, and you marry the two dummies to each

other to make me break my word. It’s not enough you are endowering

them with the greatest share of your wealth. Twenty thousand drachmas,

just gods! Twenty thousand drachmas! Aren’t you ashamed? With what

will you live at the age of seventy? Who will pay for your doctors

when you become ill; your lawyers when you have a law suit? Finally,

what will I do when this trickster, this hypocrite, Anitus and his

party that you could have won over to yourself conspire to persecute

you, as they’ve done so many times? Heaven confound philosophers and

philosophy, and my stupid friendship for you! You meddle to direct

others when you need to be led about. You argue endlessly and you have

no common sense. If you weren’t the best man in the world, you would

be the most ridiculous and unbearable. Listen: Only one word will

work. Instantly break off this impertinent bargain and do what your

wife wishes.

 

SOCRATES:

My dear Xantippe, it’s quite well to speak and with moderation; but

listen to me in your turn. I didn’t propose this marriage. Sophronine

and Aglaea love each other and are worthy of each other. I’ve already

given you all the wealth that I could grant you under the laws. I am

giving almost all which remains to me to the daughter of my friend.

The little I am keeping will suffice for me. I have neither doctors to

pay, because I am sober, nor lawyers, because I have no debts. With

regard to the philosophy for which you reproach me it teaches me how

to suffer the indignities of Anitus and your reproaches. To love you

despite your temper. (he leaves)

 

XANTIPPE:

The old fool! I have to respect him despite himself, for after all,

there’s I don’t know what of grandeur in his folly. The calm of his

extravagances enrages me. It’s useless for me to scold him; I waste my

efforts. I’ve been screaming at him for thirty years, and when I’ve

really screamed he overawes me and I am really confounded. Could he

have something in his soul superior to mine?

 

DRIXA: (entering)

Well, Madam Xantippe! See how you are mistress in your own house! Fie!

How cowardly to allow oneself to be governed by one’s husband! This

cursed Socrates has carried off this handsome boy whose fortune I

wanted to make! The traitor! He will pay me for that!

 

XANTIPPE:

My poor Madame Drixa, don’t be angry with my husband. I am

sufficiently angry with him. He’s an imbecile, I know that very well.

But at bottom, he’s got the best heart in the world. There’s no malice

in him. He commits every possible stupidity without intending any

trickery and with so much integrity that it’s disarming. Anyway, he’s

headstrong like a mule. I’ve spent my life torturing him; I’ve even

beaten him sometimes. Not only have I been unable to correct him, I

haven’t even been able to anger him. What do you expect me to do?

 

DRIXA:

I will avenge myself, I tell you. I notice under the porticoes his

good friend Anitus and some of ours. Let me alone.

 

XANTIPPE:

My God! I fear that all these folks may play my husband some trick.

Let’s go quickly to warn him. for after all, one cannot help loving

him.

 

(Exit Xantippe)

 

DRIXA:

Our insults are alike, respected Anitus. You are betrayed like me.

This dishonest man, Socrates, is giving almost all his wealth to

Aglaea only to drive you to despair. You must exact an exemplary

vengeance.

 

ANITUS:

That’s indeed my intention; heaven is concerned in it. Since he

disdains me, this man doubtless scorns the gods. Accusations have

already been brought against him; you must help me to renew them.

We’ll put him in danger of his life. Then I will offer him my

protection on the condition that he gives me Aglaea and surrenders

your handsome Sophronine to you. That way we will fulfill all our

duties. He will be punished by the fright we have given him. I will

obtain my mistress and you shall have your lover.

 

DRIXA:

You speak like wisdom itself. Some divinity must inspire you. Instruct

us: what must be done?

 

ANITUS:

The judges will soon pass here to go to the Tribunal; Melitus is at

their head.

 

DRIXA:

But that Melitus is a little pedant; an evil man who is your enemy.

 

ANITUS:

Yes, but he’s even more an enemy of Socrates. He’s a hypocritical

rogue who maintains the rights of the Areopagus against me. But we

will join together when it’s a question of ruining those false wise

men who are capable of enlightening the people about our conduct.

Listen, my dear Drixa, you are devout.

 

DRIXA:

Yes, assuredly, my lord. I love money and pleasure with all my heart,

but as regards devotion, I will give place to no one.

 

ANITUS:

Go take some devout people with you and when the judges pass by,

scream out against impiety.

 

TERPANDRE:

Will there be something to gain by it? We are ready.

 

ACROS:

Yes. But what kind of impiety?

 

ANITUS:

All types. You have only to accuse him boldly of not believing in the

gods. That’s the quickest way.

 

DRIXA:

Oh! Let me do it.

 

ANITUS:

You will be perfectly seconded. Go under these porticoes; stir up your

friends. Meanwhile, I am going to instruct some newsmongers of the

controversy, some hack scribblers who often come to dine with me. They

are very despicable people, I admit. But, when they are carefully

directed, on occasion, they can do harm. All means must be used to

make the good cause triumph. Go, my dear friends. Commend yourselves

to Ceres. You will shout on my given signal. It’s the sure way of

gaining hearers, and especially to live happily on earth.

 

(They leave; Nonoti, Chomos and Bertios enter)

 

ANITUS:

Tireless, Nonoti, deep Chomos, fastidious Bertios; have you prepared

against this evil Socrates the little works I ordered?

 

NONOTI:

I have labored, Milord; he won’t recover from it.

 

CHOMOS:

I have demonstrated the truth against him. He is confounded.

 

BERTIOS:

I said only one word in my paper: he is ruined.

 

ANITUS:

Take care, Nonoti. I forbade you to be prolix. You are naturally

boring; you could try the patience of the court.

 

NONOTI:

Milord, I’ve written only a page. There I prove that the soul is an

infused quintessence; that tails are given to animals to shoo flies;

that love works miracles, and that consequently Socrates is an enemy

of the state who must be exterminated.

 

ANITUS:

You couldn’t draw a better conclusion. Go bring your accusation to the

second judge, who is an excellent philosopher. I will answer for it.

You will soon defeat your enemy Socrates.

 

NONOTI:

Milord, I am not his enemy. I am only annoyed that he’s got too great

a reputation, and all that I am doing is for the glory of Ceres, and

the good of the country.

 

ANITUS:

Go, I tell you. Hurry up. Well, wise Chomos, what have you done?

 

CHOMOS:

Milord, not having found anything to reprove in Socrates’ writings,

I’ve adroitly accused him of thinking contrary to what he says. I

point out the venom in what he says.

 

ANITUS:

Marvelous. Take that piece to the fourth judge. He’s a man who lacks

common sense and will understand you perfectly. And you, Bertios?

 

BERTIOS:

Milord, here’s my last paper on chaos. I show, cleverly passing from

chaos to the Olympic games, that Socrates is perverting the youth.

 

ANITUS:

Admirable! Go on my behalf to the seventh judge and tell him that I

commend Socrates to him. Fine, here’s Melitus already, the Chief of

the Eleven coming forward. There’s no beating around the bush to be

done with him. We know each other, too well.

 

(Exit Bertios and Chomos, enter Melitus.)

 

ANITUS:

Your honor, the judge, a word. Socrates must be destroyed.

 

MELITUS:

Your Reverence, the Priest, I’ve been pondering it for a long while.

Let’s unite on this point and we will be less embroiled on the rest.

 

ANITUS:

I know quite well we hate each other. But while detesting each other,

we must unite to govern the republic.

 

MELITUS:

Agreed. No one can hear us here. I know that you are a fraud. You

don’t look on me as an honest man. I cannot injure you because you are

a high priest. You cannot ruin me because I am the leading judge, But

Socrates could hurt either of us by unmasking us. You and I must begin

by compassing his death and then we will see how we can exterminate

each other at the first opportunity.

 

ANITUS:

No one could say it better.

 

(Aside)

Hum! How I’d like to hold this rascal from the Areopagus on an altar,

arms hanging on one side, legs over the other, so as to open his

stomach with my golden knife and consult his liver at my ease.

 

MELITUS: (aside)

Will I ever get this gallows bird of a High Priest in jail and make him

drink a pint of Hemlock at my pleasure?

 

ANITUS:

There now, my dear chap, there are your comrades who are coming

forward. I’ve prepared the mood of the people.

 

MELITUS:

Very fine, my dear ally. Count on me as yourself at this moment. But

the grudge still remains.

 

(Some judges pass through the porticoes. Anitus whispers in Melitus’

ear.)

 

DRIXA, TERPANDRE, ACROS:

Justice! Justice! Scandal, impiety! Justice, justice! Irreligion,

impiety! Justice!

 

ANITUS:

What’s all this, my friends? Of what are you complaining?

 

DRIXA, TERPANDRE, ACROS:

Justice! In the name of the people.

 

MELITUS:

Against whom?

 

DRIXA, TERPANDRE, ACROS:

Against Socrates.

 

MELITUS:

Ah! ah! Against Socrates? It’s not the first time he’s been complained

of. What’s he done?

 

ACROS:

I don’t know anything about it.

 

TERPANDRE:

They say that he gives money to girls to get married.

 

ACROS:

Yes. He’s corrupting the youth.

 

DRIXA:

He’s impious. He never offers gifts to Ceres. He says there’s too much

gold and too much useless money in the temples. That the poor are

dying of hunger and that they must be helped.

 

ACROS:

Yes, he says that the priests of Ceres sometimes get drunk. It’s true,

he’s impious.

 

DRIXA:

He’s a heretic. He denies the plurality of the gods. He’s a deist. He

believes only in one God. He’s an atheist.