The Witness - Grace Livingston Hill Lutz (top 5 books to read txt) 📗
- Author: Grace Livingston Hill Lutz
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Gave The Fellowship Grip That Had Meant So Much To Each In College.
A Moment They Stood So, Looking Into Each Other's Eyes, Courtland,
Wondering, Startled, Questioning. It Was Gila, Of Course! Nothing Else
Could Reach The Man's Soul And Make Him Look Like That! But What Had
Happened? Not Death! No, Not Even Death Could Bring That Look Of Shame
And Degradation To His High-Minded Friend's Eyes.
As If Tennelly Had Read His Question He Spoke In A Voice So Husky With
Emotion That His Words Were Scarcely Audible: "Didn't Pat Tell You?"
Courtland Shook His Head.
Tennelly's Head Went Down, As If He Were Waiting For Courage To Speak.
Then, Huskily: "She's Gone, Court!"
"Gone?"
"Left Me, Court! She Sailed At Daybreak For Italy With Another Man."
Tennelly Fumbled In His Pocket And Brought Out A Crumpled Note,
Blistered With Tears. "Read It!" He Muttered, And Turned Away To The
Window.
Courtland Read:
Dear Lew,--I'm Sure When You Come To Your Senses
And Get Over Some Of Your Narrow Ideas You'll Be As Much
Relieved As I Am Over What I've Decided To Do. You And I
Never Were Fitted For Each Other, And I Can't Stand This
Life Another Day. I'm Simply Perishing! It's Up To Me To Do
Something, For I Know, With Your Strait-Laced Notions, You
Never Will! So When You Read This I Shall Be Out Of Reach,
On My Way To Italy With Count Von Bremen. They Say There's
Going To Be War In This Country, Anyway, And I Hate Such
Things, So I Had To Get Out Of It. You Won't Have Any
Trouble In Getting A Divorce, And You'll Soon Be Glad I Did
It.
As For The Kid, If She Lives She's Much Better Off With You
Than With Me, For You Know I Never Could Stand Children;
They Get On My Nerves. And, Anyhow, I Never Could Be All The
Things You Tried To Make Me, And It's Better In The End This
Way. So Good-By, And Don't Try To Come After Me. I Won't
Come Back, No Matter What You Do, For I'm Bored To Death
With The Last Two Years And I've Got To See Some Life!
Gila
Courtland Read The Flippant Little Note Twice Before He Trusted Himself
To Speak, And Then He Walked Over To The Window, Slowly Smoothing And
Folding The Crumpled Paper. A Baby's Cry In The Next Room Pierced The
Air, And The Father Gripped The Window-Seat And Quivered As If A Bullet
Had Struck Him.
Chapter 32 Pg 187
Courtland Put His Hand Lovingly Within His Friend's Arm: "Nelly, Old
Fellow," He Said, "You Know That I Feel With You--"
"I Know, Court!" With A Weary Sigh. "That's Why I Sent For You. I Had To
Have You, Somehow!"
"Nelly! There Aren't Any Words Made Delicate Enough To Handle This Thing
Without Hurting. It's Raw Flesh And Full Of Nerves. There's Just One
Can Do Anything Here! I Wish You Believed In God!"
"I Do!" Said Tennelly, In A Dreary Tone.
"He Can Come Near You And Give You Strength To Bear It. I Know, For He
Did It For Me Once!"
Courtland Felt As If His Words Were Falling On Deaf Ears, But Tennelly,
After A Pause, Asked, Bitterly:
"Why Did He Do This To Me, If He's What You Say He Is?"
"I'm Not Sure That He Did, Old Man! I Think Perhaps You And I Had A Hand
In It!"
Tennelly Looked At Him Keenly For An Instant And Turned Away, Silent. "I
Know What You Mean," He Said. "You Told Me I'd Go Through Hell, And I
Have. I Knew It In A Way Myself, But I'm Afraid I'd Do It Again! I Loved
Her! God! I'm Afraid--I _Love Her Yet_! Man! You Don't Know What An Ache
Such Love Is."
"Yes, I Do," Said Courtland, With A Sudden Light In His Face, But
Tennelly Was Not Heeding Him.
"It Isn't Entirely That I've Lost Her; That I've Got To Give Up Hoping
That She'll Some Time Care And Settle Down To Knowing She Is Gone
Forever! It's The Way She Went! The--The--The _Disgrace_! The
Humiliation! The Awfulness Of The Way She Went! We've Never Had Anything
Like That In Our Family. And To Think My Baby Has Got To Grow Up To Know
That Shame! To Know That Her Mother Was A Disgraceful Woman! That I Gave
Her A Mother Like That!"
"Now, Look Here, Tennelly! You Didn't Know! You Thought She Would Be All
Right When You Were Married!"
"But I _Did Know_!" Wailed Tennelly. "I Knew In My Soul! I Think I Knew
When I First Saw Her, And That Was Why I Worried About You When You Used
To Go And See Her. I Knew She Wasn't The Woman For You. But, Blamed Fool
That I Was! I Thought I Was More Of A Man Of The World, And Would Be
Able To Hold Her! No, I Didn't, Either, For I Knew It Was Like Trying To
Enjoy A Sound Sleep In A Powder-Magazine With A Pocketful Of Matches, To
Trust My Love To Her! But I Did It, Anyway! I Dared Trouble! And My
Little Child Has Got To Suffer For It!"
Chapter 32 Pg 188
"Your Little Child Will Perhaps Be Better For It!"
"I Can't See It That Way!"
"You Don't Have To. If God Does, Isn't That Enough?"
"I Don't Know! I Can't See God Now; It's Too Dark!" Tennelly Put His
Forehead Against The Window-Pane And Groaned.
"But You Have Your Little Child," Said Courtland, Hesitating. "Isn't
That Something To Help?"
"She Breaks My Heart," Said The Father. "To Think Of Her Worse Than
Motherless! That Little Bit Of A Helpless Thing! And It's My Fault That
She's Here With A Future Of Shame!"
"Nothing Of The Sort! It'll Be Your Fault If She Has A Future Of Shame,
But It's Up To You. Her Mother's Shame Can't Hurt Her If You Bring Her
Up Right. It's Your Job, And You Can Get A Lot Of Comfort Out Of It If
You Try!"
"I Don't See How," Dully.
"Listen, Tennelly. Does She Look Like Her Mother?"
Tennelly's Sensitive Face Quivered With Pain. "Yes," He Said, Huskily.
"I'll Send For Her And You Can See." He Rang A Bell. "I Brought Her And
The Nurse Up To Town With Me This Morning."
An Elderly, Kind-Faced Woman Brought The Baby In, Laid It In A Big Chair
Where They Could See It, And Then Withdrew.
Courtland Drew Near, Half Shyly, And Looked In Startled Wonder. The Baby
Was Strikingly Like Gila, With All Her Grace, Delicate Features, Wide
Innocent Eyes. The Sweep Of The Long Lashes On The Little White Cheeks,
That Were All Too White For Baby Flesh, Seemed Old And Weird In The Tiny
Face. Yet When The Baby Looked Up And Recognized Its Father It Crowed
And Smiled, And The Smile Was Wide And Frank And Lovable, Like
Tennelly's. There Was Nothing Artificial About It. Courtland Drew A Long
Sigh Of Relief. For The Moment He Had Been Looking At The Baby As If It
Were Gila Grown Small Again; Now He Suddenly Realized It Was A New
Little Soul With A Life And A Spirit Of Its Own.
"She Will Be A Blessing To You, Nelly," He Said, Looking Up Hopefully.
"I Don't See It That Way!" Said The Hopeless Father, Shaking His Head.
"Would You Rather Have Her--Taken Away--As Her Mother Suggested?" He
Hazarded, Suddenly.
Tennelly Gave Him One Quick, Startled Look. "God! No!" He Said, And
Staggered Back Into A Chair. "Do You Think She Looks So Sick As That? I
Know She's Not Well. I Know She's Lost Flesh! But She's Been Neglected.
Gila Never Cared For Her And Wouldn't Be Bothered Looking After Things.
Chapter 32 Pg 189She Was Angry Because The Baby Came At All. She Resented Motherhood
Because It Put A Limitation On Her Pleasures. My Poor Little Girl!"
Tennelly Dropped Upon His Knees Beside The Baby And Buried His Face In
Its Soft Little Neck.
The Baby Swept Its Dark Lashes Down With The Old Gila Trick, And Looked
With A Puzzled Frown At The Dark Head So Close To Her Face. Then She Put
Up Her Little Hand And Moved It Over Her Father's Hair With An Awkward
Attempt At Comfort. The Great Big Being With His Head In Her Neck Was In
Trouble, And She Was Vaguely Sympathetic.
A Wave Of Pity Swept Over Courtland. He Dropped Upon His Knees Beside
His Friend And Spoke Aloud:
"O Lord God, Come Near And Let My Friend Feel Thy Presence Now In His
Terrible Distress. Somehow Speak Peace To His Soul And Help Him To Know
Thee, For Thou Art The Only One That Can Help Him. Help Him To Tell Thee
All His Heart's Bitterness Now, Alone With Thee And His Little Child,
And Find Relief."
Softly Courtland Arose And Slipped From The Room, Leaving Them Alone
With The Presence.
* * * * *
Gila Had Been Gone Two Months When The Day Was Finally Set For Bonnie's
Wedding.
There Had Been Consultations Long And Many Over What To Do About Telling
Tennelly, For Even Bonnie Saw That The Event Could Not But Be Painful To
Him, Coming As It Did On The Heels Of His Own Deep Trouble. And Tennelly
Had Long Been Courtland's Best Friend; At Least Until Pat Grew So Close
As To Share That Privilege With Him. It Was Finally Decided That
Courtland Should Tell Tennelly About The Approaching Wedding At His
First Opportunity.
Bonnie Had Long Ago Heard All About Gila, Been Through The Bitter Throes
Of Jealousy, And Come Out Clear And Trusting, With The Whole Thing
Sanely And Happily Relegated To That Place
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