The Circle and the Dot - E. C. Nemeth (best ereader for epub .TXT) 📗

pang of homesickness knowing that he had never relocated the place of his own birth.
“I have watched you for a long time, Dot.
“I have engaged you in conversation and you ignored me. I have tried shocking you into wakefulness many times without success. Over the ages I have escalated my attempts to rouse you from your sleep. I have slapped you and punched you, to no avail. I have thrown rocks and boulders at you but you didn’t so much as flinch. Then I progressed through asteroids, planets and stars. Each time you remained impervious and oblivious. Each time I would come back to check on you and there you would be, unscathed – exactly as I had left you. I grew frustrated and tossed a black hole at you that swallowed you whole. I thought for sure that would be the end of you, but no. The black hole continued its life cycle and slowly, over eons, it evaporated and dissolved away. And there you were as before, unhurt. You are indestructible and I want to know why!” the words spewed out of Zeus’ mouth before he was aware of it. He attributed the outburst to the disruptive thoughts of his early childhood experiences.
Dot was dumbfounded. He was speechless. He had no idea what to make of this revelation.
He had existed for … for, forever? He could not be destroyed? Dot shuddered at the possibility that that weren’t so.
‘I could suddenly cease to be?’ he thought, ‘Then I’d be gone forever? But suddenly becoming aware is similar to that. It implies that there was a time before I was aware about which I can have no direct knowledge. And maybe during that time I did exist. I would have no memory of it, however, because I was not yet aware.’
Confused, Dot decided to ignore the god’s outburst and to pursue another topic of interest instead.
“Have you traveled far? Can you recommend some interesting experiences?” he asked.
“I am a god!” said Zeus in disdain, “I have traveled from one corner of the universe to the other. I have investigated every nook and cranny in the cosmos. Nothing escapes my notice,” he finished in a huff, turning his head slightly away and raising his chin haughtily.
“…for long, anyway.” He added this last under his breath.
“What would you recommend as a must see experience, then?”
“I don’t know. There are so many wondrous things out there.” Zeus brought one hand up to support his chin and scratched the side of his face with a finger.
A more experienced observer would have recognized the shifting eyes and furtive glances as a sure sign of craftiness. Zeus was weighing his options very carefully before he spoke and they didn’t necessarily coincide with Dot’s personal safety.
“There’s the folded space of the protoverse. That’s always fun. Especially once you get the knack of being physically divided into several different pieces.”
Zeus took a few steps to limber up and to give himself some time to think.
This creature is central to the master’s plans, he thought. Therefore I must find a way to destroy it. It’s not that the master’s design is bad, it’s just that it is a unilateral decision with no input from the rest of us immortals, he justified. He quickly devised a suitable course of action.
“Yes. Well. If one has already been to the center of the universe, which is quite spectacular, the only thing that beats it is the moment of creation itself, I suppose,” stated Zeus emphatically, “And before you ask, we are right now at the center of the universe. Like the view?” he smirked.
“I will go to this moment of creation and see it for myself.”
And with that said, Dot disappeared.
Of course to Dot it looked as though Zeus disappeared and along with him everything else that looked familiar had vanished also. The scene that replaced it was fascinating but it was at first difficult to discern any significant details. The tremendous pressure was immediately recognizable, as was the extreme heat. It was so uncomfortable that Dot had to step out of the experience, which he did.
In so doing Dot stepped right out of the universe.
The first thing Dot noticed was that this new place was extensively vast. He wasn’t sure why he knew that so positively. It seemed to be imprinted in every spot. Each speck of this place seemed to be connected to every other speck. Dot felt it was somehow a familiar experience. How that could be he had no idea.
Then he saw her.
She was the most exquisite creature Dot could have imagined. She had curves that smoothly traversed the length and breadth of her form in a sensuous looping arc that curled backwards around itself. She shone with a pure white light and its intensity was daunting yet somehow comforting as well. Dot decided she was radiant.
“Hello Dot.”
Her voice sounded like liquid silver. For a moment he was lost in the ecstasy of it.
“Hi,” was all he could muster.
“So it begins,” she stated.
“Yes,” Dot heard himself declare. Why he said that he had no idea.
“Good.”
“Camarilla?”
“Yes?”
“That is your name is it not?”
“Yes. Don’t worry Dot. All is well. You are not required to understand, only to know. Remember that.” She moved closer to Dot as she spoke. “Together we shall fulfill the master’s design. We shall create a spectacular experience of unparalleled beauty.”
“I am required only to know, not to understand,” repeated Dot, committing the words to memory.
“I know I have loved you and always will,” stated Dot, “but I don’t understand how that can be. I’ve only just met you…” he trailed off.
“And I shall always love you as well, Dot. And it is that love that will power our creation.”
She was close enough now to touch. His body ached. His senses thrummed. His thoughts whirled. He was aware only of her closeness and his responses to that fact. He could finally not contain himself.
He willed himself to nudge her circular form in a loving equivalent of a caress. He felt her respond favorably, longingly.
In that moment of contact Dot suddenly found himself overwhelmed by a great rush of ‘knowings’. They swamped his awareness and he had to mentally reassert control by pushing the ‘knowings’ out of his immediate awareness. Dot stored the information and decided to contemplate it at a more appropriate time. Now there was only himself and Camarilla. His caresses had continued unabated throughout, however, as if the need to touch her was ingrained on his, … his soul.
He returned his attention to Camarilla. She was coruscating with a pure white light, radiating intense energy. His caresses became more ardent as he explored every inch of her form. The halo of light that surrounded her continued to brighten. She began moving with him, rising up to meet him as he turned round her. They became engrossed in the circular rhythm of their movements.
The gyrations of their forms increased until it seemed to Dot that he might cause her harm. But she reassured him by rubbing against him with renewed vigor. Dot found himself repeatedly moving away and flinging himself at Camarilla and she responded by rushing toward his approach with reckless abandon. Dot lost himself in his mounting need and let the sensual feelings wash over him.
Dot was about to conclude that these erotic feelings themselves seemed to be too much to bear any longer when he had to braced himself for yet another impact.
Just as Dot was about to slam into Camarilla she was suddenly no longer there.
Then an experience that he would never forget ripped through his essence.
It began where the feeling of ecstasy had left off. At that precise point he had a moment of clarity, a plateau of calm where he suddenly knew he was home, safe and secure. In that moment he heard his thoughts wondering where Camarilla had gone. Then a mounting feeling of love rose within him to overflowing. As the floodgates burst and his senses exploded in orgasmic spasms of fervent release he was suddenly made aware of the fact that Camarilla was all around him.
In the aftermath of the erotic encounter, satiated, Dot languished in the waves of intense impulses that washed, to and fro, over his senses.
Some time later Dot realized that he was again feeling extremely hot and heavy. Again he stepped out of the experience and right out of the newly created universe. Except this time he felt as though he was still inside the universe. It was just his mind that seemed to have found a way to escape its confines.
Confused but ready to assimilate this new experience Dot focused his attention on the situation. Dot looked down upon the tiny cosmic egg from his extra-universal viewpoint. Its familiarity at first escaped him. For some reason he immediately thought of how he seemed to have entered the essence of Camarilla’s form at the height of their encounter. This thought was followed by the awareness that he didn’t remember ever getting out again. Dot quickly surmised that he must then still be inside of her.
That realization in turn lead Dot to wonder why his mind had found a way out but not the rest of him. He could not come up with a rational solution to this problem. The more he tried thinking of a plausible explanation the more confused he became. His confusion simply continued to mount until it was verging on hysteria.
“Dot?” said a familiar voice. “Why do you torment yourself so?” it continued.
“Camarilla? Where are you?”
“You already know, Dot. Remember?”
“Help me to understand!”
“You need not understand,” chided the silvery voice, “You only need to know.”
“What! What do I need to know?”
“Oh my love! Your innocence melts my heart. You have no true need because you already know all. That’s all you need to know.”
“Help me to remember then, Camarilla. Please,” he pleaded.
“Very well, my love.”
The ensuing moment of silence was interminable.
“You are the circle,” she revealed.
The words ganged up on Dot’s mind and pummeled it into submission. He could not at first grasp the full significance of Camarilla’s revelation intellectually but he immediately felt its impact expanding his awareness. He decided to suspend his rational judgements and just experience the ensuing transformation.
Dot turned his attention back to the cosmic egg just as a ragged crack appeared on the egg’s surface. As Dot watched the crack quickly circumnavigated the egg. From it spewed the most brilliant light Dot could ever have imagined.
The crack was a jagged line and an intense band of pure white light radiated from it. The ring of light shot out of the egg and rushed towards Dot. Just as it was about to pass him the light exploded into a sphere. The sphere shone with unparalleled power for a moment before it subsided, running through the gamut of colors from blue to red and beyond. Then it faded from view.
“I am the circle,” stated Dot.
“I am the Dot,” he continued.
“I am in all,” he finished.
Only then did the cosmic egg finally explode, and shards of it sped off in every direction.
Dot experienced his essence being torn asunder.

Transition Level #1

“Suit yourself,” he heard a voice saying, “I can’t stop you anyways, I suppose.”
Dot focussed his awareness on the familiar tone and his essence began to reassemble.
“But be forewarned,” the voice went on, “The experience is extremely compelling and it might take many eons to reassert conscious control.”
Dot’s essence coalesced and he became aware of his surroundings. He saw Zeus standing in front of him.