The Castrator - Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov (most read books in the world of all time .txt) 📗

HAD TO FOLLOW THEM FOR THE SIMPLE REASON THAT I COULDN'T TELL THEM ABOUT THE LITTLE NIGHT INCIDENT, OR MY FIGHT WITH GUS.

"THEN GASS WAS A MIGHTY MANTRIC![1] " THOUGHT I. "THAT'S WHY EVEN BLUEBIRD HAD A FEAR OF HIM. HIS SPIRITUAL POWERS MUST HAVE BEEN IMMENSE!"

AS WE DROVE PAST THE TOWN, OR RATHER LITERALLY FLEW PAST IT, I COULD FEEL THE NOSTALGIA OF THOSE WIDE STREETS THAT SEEMED TO BE A SYMBOL OF FREEDOM. SOME OF THE BUILDINGS WERE IN BEAUTIFUL VICTORIAN STYLE AND WERE DESIGNED FOR HOLIDAY LETS.

I FELT THE WIND IN MY EARS AGAIN. AND THE SAME RELATIVELY UNIFORM LANDSCAPES BEGAN TO CHANGE AROUND ME. SOMEWHERE TOWARDS ASHLAND CITY WE CROSSED ONE OF THOSE STRANGE BRIDGES WITH RUSTY IRONWORK. OUR WHOLE GROUP HAD ASSEMBLED AS INSTRUCTED BACK AT IRONWOOD, BUT OUR PASSAGE THROUGH ASHLAND CITY WAS NOT WITHOUT PROBLEMS. WE HAD TO REFUEL, AND SOME ARROGANT GUY WOULDN'T GIVE ANY TO EVERYONE, AND THEN HE JUST GOT BRUTALLY BEATEN. LUCKILY THERE WERE NO WITNESSES. TO GET TO MADELINE ISLAND, WE JUST HAD TO TAKE THE FERRY FROM THE BAYFIELD TERMINAL - OF COURSE THIS TOOK A WHILE, BUT NOBODY CARED.

WHILE RIDING ON THEIR IRON HORSES, THE MEMBERS OF THE GANG DID NOT SAY A WORD TO EACH OTHER - THEY HAD A LANGUAGE OF THEIR OWN, WHICH THEY UNDERSTOOD PERFECTLY.

IN A COMPARATIVELY SHORT TIME WE WERE TRANSFERRED THROUGH LAKE SUPERIOR.

NOW ALL WE HAD TO DO WAS GET TO THE CEMETERY ITSELF - WHERE WE WOULD GET OUR PLEAS ANSWERED AND FEEL EVERYTHING. BUT IT WAS HERE THAT THE THOUGHT OF WHO HAD PLACED THE GRIMOIRE IN THE GRAVE THAT HAD BEEN DUG BY BENZOUR RAN THROUGH MY MIND AGAIN. THIS QUESTION, UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES THUS CREATED, ASSUMED PARAMOUNT IMPORTANCE.

WE STOPPED AT MIDPORT IN LA POINTE CITY TO REST FOR A WHILE, AND THE THREE OF US AND ZONAR DECIDED TO TAKE A WALK - NOT WITHOUT THE SUPERVISION OF OUR PATRONS.

WE FINALLY ENTERED THE CEMETERY PARK, ACCOMPANIED BY A FEW OF THE ROCKERS - THE OTHERS PREFERRED TO LOUNGE IN THE AREA, AND WOULD ALSO COME BACK A LITTLE LATER IF NEEDED.

IN AN AMORPHOUS SOCIETY, IT WAS EASY TO SEE THE LACK OF STRUCTURE, AND HENCE EVERYTHING ELSE.

THE ENTRANCE TO THE CEMETERY PARK WAS WIDE OPEN, BUT WE CHOSE TO ENTER ANOTHER WAY - HARDLY THE LATE BENZOUR... WHAT IF THE MANTRIC HAD JUST POSSESSED HIS BODY? SUBTLE SORCERERS WERE UNIVERSALLY KNOWN FOR THEIR SPECIAL PRACTICES THAT COULD MAKE CERTAIN PEOPLE PERFORM CERTAIN ACTIONS. THEY CONCENTRATED A SPECIFIC NEGATIVE ENERGY THAT HELPED THEM MAKE IT HAPPEN, AND THE RITUALS THEY USED WERE KNOWN ONLY TO THEM.

- "KEEP THIS MOMENT, BECAUSE IT IS ALL YOU HAVE - YESTERDAY HAS ALREADY PASSED, AND TOMORROW MAY NOT COME," ARLO TURNED TO ME, "IN FACT, NO ONE WILL REMEMBER YOU - EXCEPT THE ALMIGHTY, AND THE ONLY REASON FOR THAT IS THE FACT THAT WE HAVE A COMMON JOB TO DO. IT IS NOT A QUESTION OF LOVE, BUT OF DUTY. THESE ARE THE RULES OF THE GAME! AND YET OUR JOB IS TO LOVE PEOPLE," HE CONCLUDED.

HOW LITTLE I ACTUALLY KNEW THEM!

ARLO KNEW THAT I KNEW.

- "IF YOU REALLY ARE A CREATURE OF GOD, THEN WHY DID YOU COMMIT THAT TREASON," I ASKED HIM WITHOUT THE SLIGHTEST FORM OF FEAR.

- 'IT IS NOT GIVEN TO MEN TO UNDERSTAND THE WHOLE DESIGN OF HEAVEN,' ARLO TURNED TO ME, 'AND YET I SAW SOMETHING IN YOU. I AM THE ANGEL OF BLESSINGS[2].

I WOULD NOT HAVE EXPECTED SUCH WORDS FROM AN ANGEL FOR WHOM THE DURATION OF A HUMAN LIFE WAS TOO FLEETING, BUT I FELT RELIEF IN MY SOUL-EVEN IF I WENT SOMEWHERE BETWEEN HELL AND HEAVEN, OR IF MY SOUL DISAPPEARED AFTER A HUNDRED THOUSAND YEARS, HAVING BECOME A BLACK SPIRIT, AND MY SPIRIT WAS COVERED BY THE SHADOW OF IGNORANCE. AFTER ALL, EXISTENCE WAS HERE AND NOW! ONLY THIS MOMENT MATTERED!

WE WALKED FORWARD AND ZONARA SHOWED ME THE RIGHT SPOT - IT DIDN'T TAKE HER TOO LONG TO FIND IT. IT WAS LONELY AND UNGAINLY. FORTUNATELY, THE WEATHER WAS CLEAR, NOT LIKE IN MY DREAM.

IT WAS MY GRAVE. BUT HOW WAS THAT POSSIBLE, SINCE I HAD NEVER DIED? IT SEEMED I WAS DREAMING IN REALITY OR JUST LOSING MY MIND.

- THE MANTRIC WANTED TO USE YOUR OWN BODY AND THEN TAKE IT TO THE REAL GRAVE HE HAD DUG FOR YOU," ARLO WHISPERED IN MY EAR, "BUT WE PREVENTED HIM. "HE GOT THE KNIFE IN HIS HAND FROM US AGAIN."

- "AND WHERE DID THE GRIMOIRE COME FROM?," WONDERED I.

ZONARA, IN WHICH I RECOGNIZED MY ARCHANGEL OVERSEER AND APPROACHED:

- THY GRAVE WAS DUG IN A TREACHEROUS MANNER. THIS, OF COURSE, DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU WILL NOT HAVE PUNISHMENT FOR ALL THE SINS IN YOUR LIFE. YOUR FATE WILL NOT CHANGE MUCH - ON THE CONTRARY, BUT AT LEAST YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO SHOW THE WILL TO DO SOMETHING GOOD.

I KNEW THAT ABRAMELIN'S GRIMOIRE DATED BACK TO SOMEWHERE IN THE FIFTEENTH CENTURY - THERE WERE QUITE A FEW ANTIQUARIAN COPIES, BUT THE REAL GRIMOIRE, WITH PAGES OF ANIMAL SKIN, WAS BOUGHT BY THE BRUTAL FELISTER BECAUSE HE APPARENTLY HAD A PLAN - A PLAN FOR SOMETHING TOO BIG.

- "SO, THE MANTRIC GUS BENZOUR," I BEGAN, BUT ZONARA CUT ME OFF.

- THE MANTRIC'S NAME ISN'T THAT IMPORTANT - HE NEEDS BODIES. BODIES TO MAKE HIS PRESENCE POSSIBLE IN YOUR MATERIAL WORLD. ONES HE CAN POSSESS. BY THE WAY, TO PERFORM SUCH AN ATTACK HE NEEDS A CERTAIN LEVEL OF SPIRITUAL ENERGY.

BUT SOMETHING WASN'T CONNECTING AT ALL. IF EVERYTHING THESE CREATURES HAD TOLD ME WAS TRUE AND IT WAS EXACTLY RIGHT, WHERE THE HELL WOULD BENZOUR HAVE BURIED IT RIGHT THERE. THEN THE BLINDFOLD FELL FROM MY EYES - THE BOOK ALSO CONTAINED TELEPORTATION RITUALS.

THE CEMETERY WAS FULL OF MYSTIQUE AND AS I SAID WE DIDN'T ENTER THROUGH THE FRONT ENTRANCE SO AS NOT TO ATTRACT THE ATTENTION OF THE GUARDS WHO WERE KEEPING A WATCHFUL EYE.

WHEN I WAS A KID AT THE ORPHANAGE IN KANSAS CITY WHERE FELISTER TOOK ME, I WAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST BULLIES. IT WAS SO COMMON TO SEE BLOOD! IN FACT, UNDER THE GUISE OF WELFARE, MANY CHILDREN THERE WERE PLACED IN THE HANDS OF WEALTHY AND INFLUENTIAL ADOPTIVE PARENTS WHO COULD PROVIDE THEM WITH BETTER CARE. OUR TEACHERS TALKED ABOUT MORAL VALUES - AT LEAST THAT I COULD REMEMBER CLEARLY, BUT WE ALL KNEW WHAT A BLEAK FUTURE AWAITED US.

AND THEN, UNEXPECTEDLY, FELISTER CAME ALONG. HE WENT TO GREAT LENGTHS TO OVERRIDE THE EDUCATION SYSTEM AND GET ME OUT - EVEN WITH SOME UNWARRANTED LAWYERLY GRASPING.

I REMEMBER HOW NANCY DORAIN - THAT WAS THE NAME OF THE LAWYER FOR THE ADOPTION CASES, HAD TOLD HIM THAT MY CASE WAS ALMOST HOPELESS AND HAD EVEN TRIED TO REFER HIM TO ANOTHER CHILD, BUT THAT DIDN'T HELP.

THE BEAUTIFUL LAWYER WITH THE STERN AND PROFESSIONAL APPEARANCE MADE IT CLEAR TO HIM THAT THE CASE WOULD BE DIFFICULT, IF NOT IMPOSSIBLE. FELISTER WOULD NEVER FORGET HER REDDISH AUBURN HAIR AND HER HORN-RIMMED GLASSES THROUGH WHICH SHE SAW HER VERSION OF REALITY, STRIPPED OF ANY UNNECESSARY "DETAILS."

HER OFFICE WAS LOCATED IN CENTRAL KANSAS CITY, AND IN PARTICULAR IN RELATIVE PROXIMITY TO OVERLAND PARK, WHICH WAS A LOVELY AND PEACEFUL PLACE.

FELISTER LOOKED AT HER SOMEWHAT SADLY AND IT WAS PROBABLY THE ONLY TIME HE HAD EVER LOOKED AT SOMEONE LIKE THAT AND ANSWERED:

- MISS, AND HAVE YOU SEEN HOW THEY LIVE IN THE STREET? MANY OF THESE CHILDREN WILL PROBABLY DIE BEFORE THEY EVEN COME OF AGE. THEY HAVE LOST THEIR CHANCE TO DEVELOP BEFORE THEY ARE EVEN BORN!

AFTER GREATLY ASSISTING IN THE ADOPTION PROCESS, THIS SAME NANCY DORAIN HAD SHOT HERSELF JUST FIVE MONTHS LATER UNDER UNEXPLAINED CIRCUMSTANCES IN HER OWN APARTMENT, WHICH WAS NOT FAR FROM HER LAW OFFICE - PERHAPS MR. EMBANKS HAD "HELPED" HER IN THIS REGARD, TO COVER HER TRACKS, OR PERHAPS - WHICH I THINK WAS MUCH MORE LIKELY - SHE HERSELF HAD AT FIRST VAGUELY, AND LATER MORE CLEARLY, FORESEEN THAT THIS WOULD BE HER LAST CASE IN HER LAW PRACTICE EVER - SO SHE HAD SPARED HERSELF THE IGNOMINY. THE WEAPON SHE'D USED TO VIOLATE HER OWN EXISTENCE WAS A MOST ORDINARY .38 CALIBER MAGNUM, AND IT REMINDED ME OF THE WEAPON ZONARA HERSELF HAD USED TO BLUDGEON THOSE BAD GUYS WHO'D CHASED US INTO THOSE WILD DESERT AREAS AND GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT. THIS IMPRESSIVE JURIST HAD PERHAPS MISSED OR SUBCONSCIOUSLY OVERLOOKED THE FACT THAT THERE WAS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DIVINE AND HUMAN JUSTICE - AND IT WAS NOT SO MUCH IN THE WORDING ITSELF, BUT MORE TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT THE MOST HIGH WAS A ROYAL JUDGE, AND HIS MODEL OF JUSTICE WAS USED BY HIS EARTHLY VICEGERENTS TO BRING ORDER, BUT THEIR POWER WAS LIMITED, AND THEIR ACCUSATIONS WERE RELATED TO SPECIFIC GOALS THAT JUSTICE WAS ABLE TO DEFINE AND PURSUE IN THE PROPER ORDER ESTABLISHED.

THINKING OF THE LATE HON. NANCY DOREEN, I SEEMED TO SOUND LIKE A JURIST MYSELF-GIVEN THE FACT THAT HER SERIOUS INTERVENTION HAD BEEN INFLUENTIAL IN THIS WHOLE CYCLE OF EVENTS AND SEEMING CONTINGENCIES. BUT SHE WAS PERHAPS THE LAST REPRESENTATIVE OF A GENERALLY MORIBUND STRATUM OF PILLARS OF JUSTICE WHO WERE BLIND AND DEAF TO THINGS UNSEEN, AND WHOSE ATTENTION WAS MAINLY CONCENTRATED ON VISIBLE AND TANGIBLE EVIDENCE AND CONCEPTS THAT WERE SUBJECT TO FITTING INTO CERTAIN FRAMEWORKS. IN NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES THEY WOULD PROBABLY HAVE BOTHERED TO INVESTIGATE, BUT FELISTER DELICATELY LET HER TENTACLES GO AND VERY SOON CERTAIN QUARTERS - INCLUDING HER FORMER COLLEAGUES CAME OUT WITH A STATEMENT THAT SHE HAD ALLOWED THIS TO HAPPEN BECAUSE OF SEVERE DEPRESSION, AND THE EXPERT MEDICAL OPINIONS ABOUT THIS WERE ALSO FORGED RELATIVELY EASILY. AND THERE WAS A GREAT DEAL OF LOGIC IN THAT, BECAUSE HER ASSOCIATES - WHILE LOSING VALUABLE LEGAL PERSONNEL, ACTUALLY SAW THE PATH BEFORE THEMSELVES AS CLEAR ENOUGH, STRAIGHTFORWARD ENOUGH, AND UNENCUMBERED BY THE VAST KNOWLEDGE OF EVERYTHING THAT WAS GOING ON OR HAD GONE ON AROUND THEM THAT THE LATE NANCY DOREEN POSSESSED. YET ALL SELF-DENIAL BROUGHT SUFFERING. IT WOULD NOT BE SUPERFLUOUS TO SAY THAT I FOUND IT RATHER AMUSING, SINCE THE FAMOUS PARADOX OF ELSBERG[3], WHERE ONE WANTED TO PLAY ON PROBABILITIES, AND HERE IT WAS A MATTER OF INDETERMINACY PRESENTED IN THE SAME WAY, WHICH WAS OF COURSE ONE HELL OF A HUGE MISTAKE, APPLIED WITH FULL FORCE. WELL, DEAR NANCY, YOU COULD SAY YOU WENT EXACTLY WHERE YOU BELONGED! AFTER ALL, ATTACHMENT TO ANYTHING WAS LIABLE TO CAUSE TROUBLE, AND LIFE WAS CONSTANTLY CHANGING.

 

[1] Mantrics are subtle sorcerers.

[2] It is about the archangel Barakiel.

[3] Ellsberg's paradox is mainly expressed in the concept that people tend to act irrationally in making their decisions, preferring a known evil that could be defined in terms of mathematical probability to the uncertainty that generates fear in them.

THE ORPHANAGE

CHAPTER NINETEEN: THE ORPHANAGE

 

I REMEMBER THE UNIQUE LIBRARY OF KANSAS CITY, WHICH WAS MANY LARGE BOOKS STACKED SIDE BY SIDE. ITS WONDERFUL EXTERIOR WAS TRULY FASCINATING AND WAS PROBABLY THE ONLY PLACE I FELT AT HOME WHILE