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the cold ground a sense of belonging takes over. Oh how I’ve missed the feeling of a warm breeze playing across my snow white fur. I lift my snout into the air and take a deep breath through my wet black nose and close my eyes listening to my surroundings. The flapping of wings catches my attentions and my eyes rip open starting into the sky and scanning tree limbs. About 50 feet from me perched on a branch in a tall oak was a large white and grey owl, a gorgeous creature. I turn my body and face the Owl my eyes locked onto his. I throw my head back and let a deafening howl rip from my throat and shatter the silence that blanketed the the East Wing. The owl opens his wings and floats down to me and before he reaches the ground he shifts into Ares. “I knew that was you” I said sarcastically. A single brow raised he crosses his arms and looks down to me, still in wolf form, “Did you now? Are you going for a run?” I nod my head to him and turn away trotting off. I raise my head slightly in the air and throw up my tail. Ares knows that this is a gesture and I hear him chuckle behind me. “Is that how it’s going to be?” I ignore his question and begin to pick up the pace. There is silence behind me for a pregnant pause and then he rips past. A midnight black wolf racing ahead of me jump starts my heart and I chase after him.

 

I catch up to within seconds. Ares is not match for a true Wolf. He only pretends to be wolf when he wants to be and the only time I have seen the Midnight wolf we have always been alone. It was a secret pleasure I had. He never knew how much it meant to me that he would only show his wolf to me. Although he is Shifter and can change into anything he wants, the Wolf he took on was only ever for my eyes. If Ares consciously made that decision I will never know, but I never saw the Midnight wolf unless it was just him and I.

Our paws beat upon the soil as we race out of the Castles borders and out into the free lands of the Realm. I speed further ahead and Ares struggles to keep up with my pace. I have been wolf my whole life and know my limits and have pushed the boundaries of my power. Ares has not yet scratched the surface of being wolf. I feel him gaining on me and I slow my pace to allow him to reach me and we continue to run shoulder to shoulder. He turns his head and looks to me his green eyes burning into my own. My heart skips a beat at his possessive glare and I speed ahead of him. I hear him laugh as the wind pushes past my ears and float through my soft fur. I haven't had a run like this in ages and I have not ran with Ares since the day we met. The only time I saw his Wolf is when we were training alone before I left to join the ranks. At that time, I thought that we were at least close friends. He was rude and cruel at time but he was an amazing teacher and I learned the basics of war from him.  I was madly in love with him when we meet and I knew that we were meant to be Bonded the moment our eyes locked. Even though it is rare to bond with another species of paranormal but it happens. Ares denied his feelings for me and that is was hurt me the most and was drove me to leave. I was under the impression that he thought I was not good enough for him or I was not what he was looking for. Being the right hand of Khan and his war dog, I thought joining the ranks would show him I was worthy of him but all it proves is how unworthy he is of my time and devotion. Being bonded is the highest honor in my opinion. You have the one person that was created for you in your life until the end of time. A love that cannot be broken and a bond that is everlasting.

 

My heart begins to tear apart thinking about what could have been. I slow my pace and Ares follows and slows his own. He looks to me as I direct my gaze to the ankle high grass surrounding us. We are utterly alone in the middle of nowhere. He lowers his snout to mine, “Are you alright?” Not wanting him to see my pain I look away from him and turn round to head back to the castle, “That is enough for one day I am going back.” He hurries in front of me and blocks my path, “Enyo…” he looks to the ground for a moment and then raises his eyes back to mine. He looks to be in pain and I feel the stab of pain through my own chest. “Enyo...Please. I cannot take this anymore. Being apart from you is too painful.” Although those are the words that I have desperately been waiting to hear, I cannot just let him back into my life because he is ready now. What about all the years my soul died for him. Being denied by your mate is the most physically painful thing I have ever experienced and I had to go through that pain alone. My eyebrows crease in anger and I stalk towards him my shoulders rising and falling with every step. My tone is harsh and angry, “You expect me to let go of all the years you denied me and take you in wholeheartedly because you accept me now.” He throw my head back in a mock laugh, “Ares...it’s your turn to feel the pain of denial.”  His eyes sadden and my heart breaks. I speed past him faster than I ever have and I know he cannot keep pace with me. I hear a screech and look into the sky. He shifted back into his favorite form...the grey and white owl and fly past me high in the sky heading back to the castle. I have a feeling that this conversation is far from over. Ares has never wanted something that he did not obtain. If I decide to give him another chance it will be on my terms and not his. I try to focus on the sounds around me to drown out the breaking of my heart.

 

We must have ran miles from the Castle because it is taking much longer to get home than I anticipated. The sun is making her journey towards to horizon and I have become quite tired. I slow my pace and trot down the long Cobblestone road that leads directly to the castle. These are the time I wish I had Dex. He sleeps lazily in his pasture and I am hoofing it back to the Castle. Ares probably made it back hours ago and I am the idiot that is stuck walking. I let out a huff of annoyance and look to the sprawling fields of wildflowers. The smell is intoxicating and I brings back so many memories of Grizel. Running through the fields as children picking flowers and making crowns from them. The wind begins to pick up throwing the flowers around making the fields look like the waves of the sea. the strong breeze swirls around me and I hear her laugh on the wind. “Grizel...I miss you… I wish you were still here.” A small tear escapes my eye and rolls down my creamy white fur. I need to get home. I increase my pace and begin to sprint the moment I see the Castle in the distance. My paws pound the cobblestone as I inch closer and closer to the front gates. I have much to think about and Ares is burning through my brain making it hard to concentrate. The issue needs to be resolved but I cannot help but want him to feel the pain that I have lived with all these years. He needs to know the consequences of his actions and what I had to go through to disconnect myself from him, just so I could release the pain of the denied bond. I want him to hurt… I want him to feel what I felt but at the same time I want him for myself, I don’t want him to be in pain but there is a part of me that wants him to suffer as I did.

I am stuck between letting him back into my life and possibly letting him hurt me again and feeling like a fool or keep him at a distance and never having my Mate. The Castle is close now and I need to go straight to my room. I need to be alone with my thoughts.

 

As I step out of the shower after washing the worries and stress of the day away I hear a knock at my bedroom door.  “Just a moment!” I call out. I dry off quickly with throw my black silk robe on and let my wet hair fall down my back. I slowly make my way to the large wooden door my feet padding on the cold stone floors. I open the door only to see Ares standing there. “What do you want?” In mock annoyance. My cheeks heat realizing that I am naked under this robe. Nudity is not something that wolves are ashamed of but for some reason Ares makes me...shy.     He looks me up and down and tried to hide his smile. “May I come in?” I look behind me and try to think of a reason to deny him but I really want to see him and I am curious in what he has to say. I roll my eyes, “I supposed but make it quick.” He nods his head and I move to the side allowing him to enter. My heart rate increases and my nerves are out of control. I have never been this scared in my life. I have rode into battle against thousands of breeds and never have I felt this terrified. This man has affect over me that I cannot control or explain.

 

He moves into the room smoothly as if he owns the place and motions to the bed. “Please sit.” I walk past the bed and pull out the dark cherry wooden chair from the large gothic Vanity at the opposite side of the room taking a seat. A small wolfish smile spreads across his face. I fear that if i get anywhere close to that bed I am going to lose control of myself. Need begins to build in my core having him so close to me. He takes slow strides towards me and stands before the vanity staring into my eyes. His green eyes scorching me. I swallowed deeply and try to speak with confidence, “What is it Ares, I am very tired.” He kneels down in front of me and his scent washes over me. My need grows and my sex begins to throb. I tighten my thighs together trying to stop the pain. His voice is cool and low, “Enyo, Why do you deny me still knowing the whole story.” My heart begins to quicken and I try to stay calm as I answer, “Do you know what it feels like to be denied by your Mate? Do you know the pain that I suffered trying to break the partial bond I made to you?” He looks to the ground and shakes his head, “No Enyo I don’t and I never

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