When the wolves come knocking - Becca (small books to read .txt) 📗

She won't call anyone. She cant, she cares too. I'll hurt her to. Im a monster. Cant stop, no control. Alice put her phone away, not calling anyone. She and Nick are both yelling over the wind. "Its not your fault" Alice keeps yelling. "Calm down Char! You have to stop, you might think its your fault, but its not. You didn't know. You can't hurt me, the only way you can is by not letting me in" he says serousily. The wind deeters for a moment, and thats all he needs.

A vine is around my shoulders, and it distracts me enough so the wind is gone for a second. He hurries over to me, just as the wind starts back up.

Hes by me in seconds.The vine receeds But I pick the wind bakc up. It dosn't affect him, hes inside now. He holds my shoulders, and looks me in the eyes. "It.is.not.your.fault" he says, determined. But it is. "Its my fault, I killed him" I whisper. I dont know if he can hear me at first, the wind is so loud.

"You did not. Now stop, I know you can" he says. "Go away" I cry, Im sobbing now. "Stop" he repeats. I shake my head. He grabs my chin so I look directly in his eyes. The deep brown sends me into a trance. "Im sorry" I hear him say as Im drifting off, lost in sleep.

The dream is so real. Demetri dieing. Hes torn apart by the winds, my wind. Im killing him. I can't stop. Its pooring, and Im killing him.

I wake up panting and shaking. Im in Nick's arms still. Hes holding me tightly. Demetri is dead, and its my fault. Im shaking more. Nick holds me tighter. "Stop thinking about it" he commands. Just his voice, make me stop thinking about him dead. "It is not your fault. You will not hurt anyone." he says sternly. "It is, and I will" I whisper. He pulls me back slightly, and looks me in the eyes. I flinch away. I can't help it. I choose him over Demetri. What did he do to me last night?

His face softens a little. "You wont, and its not" he says, reaching a hand out to brush my hair out of my eyes. I flinch back. Habit. "Im not going to hurt you" he whispers, pulling me close. "Your eyes last night..." I whisper. They scared me. "Im sorry. You wouldn't calm down. I didn't know what to do. All earth users can do it. I dont know why" he whispers.

I look over at Alice, who is asleep on her bed. "She didn't know what to do, she didn't what you to hurt yourself. She couldn't sleep" Nick explains. Alice looks worried, even in her sleep. The bed it a mess from her tossing and turning.

"Im sorry" I whisper as tears stream down my face. I was suprised I still had some left. "Don't cry" he says, whiping the tears off my face. We lay like that for a few peaceful moments, then I can't stand the silence. I stand up abrutly, and go to my dresser. I look in my glasses case. Its gone. They found it, and took it out. I throw it, frustrated. "Whats wrong?" Nick say, standing up. I quickly grab some clothes. "Im taking a shower" I say, and quickly close the bathroom door behind me and lock it.

I don't have the razor. I claw at my wrists. I've done everything wrong, and its my fault. I killed him. Blood gushes from my wrist. Its not neat. It's ragged and too much blood is comming out. No, no, I went to deep. Maby I deserve to die. No, Nick wouldn't forgive it if I died. I hear Alice wake up. She'll know. She'll know what Im doing. I hear her angerly yelling at Nick. Then she pounds on the bathroom door.

"Char, open the door. Stop it, I know what your doing" she says, frantically trying to get the door open. Im panicing. I messed up. Too much, too deep. I hear Alice swear as she leaves and I hear things moving around. Nick is asking whats going on. I frantically try to make the bleeding stop, to heal it. I can't, Im fried. Blood is all over both my hands as I keep trying to find somthing to stop it. My hands are shaking and I cant do anything. The lock clicks and Alice rushes in. She dosn't react to the blood, just gets to work. Nick however, looks shocked. Im covered in blood, and crying. Im so stupid.

She pushes me to sit on the edge of the tub, and takes my wrist. She try to stop the bleeding, it helps a little. "Call someone!" She shouts at Nick. Real panic shoots through me. No one should know. I look at Nick pleadingly. He hesitates as he meets my eyes, but dashes out of the room.

Alice is wraping my wrist, trying frantically to stop the bleeding. I can't stop shaking. I feel sick, and light headed. Nick rushes back in with someone else. She looks to be about in her 40's, and she quickly pushes Alice out of the way and does her thing. Shes quick, and stops it. I feel really sick now.

Its silent for a moment, then I have to rush over to the tolite. I throw up, and feel even more sick. The lady help me stand back up, and she signles for Alice and Nick to leave. They both start to protest, but a sharp look from her sends them away, and they shut the door.

I sit down on the floor, still feeling sick. "What did you do it?" she asks gentaly. "I can't tell you" I whisper, shaking my head. "Why not?" she asks. "I can't even tell you that" I say. She walks over to the cupord above the sink, and takes out the little pill case. She already knew. I bet they all did.

She takes out one, then gets another one from another case she already had. The one she took was the depression one from the cupord. "Take them" she orders, holding them out to me. I shake my head, keeping my mouth clamped shut.

"You know what one is. The other is so you can sleep" she says. I shake my head again. I wont take them. I don't want to feel their pitty, and feel like a pyco who needed pills to control herself. Then again, maby I was.

She sighs, and helps me up. We both walk out of the bathroom. "Get her somthing to eat. Tell Them I requested it" she tells Nick. He nodds and quickly leaves, not looking at me. I feel disgusted with myself. I still feel sick on top of that.

She hands the pills to Alice. "Make sure she takes them after she eats" she says. Alice takes them, and puts them on her dresser. "I will" She says, noding. Then the lady turns to me. "You are not to go anywhere today. Sleep, you need it" she says sternly. I nodd. She gathers her things, and leaves the sleep pills.

Nick comes in with a tray of food. An apple, sandwhich, and a orange juice. I almost throw up again at the sight of food. He sets it on my bed, and then sits on my bed, pulling me into his lap. "Don't you ever, ever do that again" he whispers, voice pained.

"Im sorry" I mumble, looking down, letting my hair fall in my face. "Stop saying that" Nick says, puling my chin up. "Stop being sorry, I know you are, you don't need to say it" he says, letting go.

Alice clears her throut akwardly. I move off Nicks lap, and he stands up. "I have to go, they want me for somthing down in the office" he says, looking at his phone. Before he closes the door, he looks at me. "I will

be back" then hes gone.

I look down at the food, and push it away. "Oh no, you are not

doing that. You are going to eat, weather you like it or not" Alice says, pushing it back twords me. My stomach heaves as I look at it, and I rush into the bathroom. I throw up all thats left in me. I come back out after I rinse my mouth out.

"Drink first, you look like your about to pass out" she said warrily. I sit back on my bed, I felt like I was going to pass out. I take the juice, and dont think as I drink half of it. I set it back down, and wait until Im sure I won't have to rush into the bathroom. I drink he rest, and eat the apple. "I can't eat anymore" I say, pushing it away.

"Eat it later" she says, putting it on my dresser. Before she can tell meto take the pills, I tell her I need to take a shower. "Im not going to do it again, it made me feel sick" I say, looking down shamefully. After a second, Alice speaks. "Go ahead, I just worry about you. What about you eh...wrist? dont you have to keep it dry?" she says akwardly. "I can" I say. I could feel some of the power still in me, I could make an air bubble around it.

She understands, and I go in the bathroom. There is still blood on the tub, and floor. I almost throw up again. I quickly clean it up, not wanting to look at it. I take a shower, and my air bubble theory works.

When Im done, Im wearing dark grey sweats, and one of my random shirts. I walk back into the room. Nick is there with Alice, waiting. They sit as far away from eachother as possible. "Okay, no more stalling, take the pills" Alice says, standing up. She holds them out to me. "No" I say firmly. I sit on my bed and cross my arms over my chest.

"For gods sake, take them Char. Im going to tell Ms.Shannon you didn't, then that will start another issue" Alice groans. Nick is standing off to Alice's side. "No" I repeat. Nick sighs and takes them from Alice, and stands in front of me. "Please just take them, it will help us all relax" he says, holding them out.

"I don't need pills to control myself" I argue. In a flash, Nick pinned me back down on the bed. I struggle a little, but I cant move, and I still feel sick. "I know that. They just help you, not control you. Now, take them" he whispers, pushing them into my hand. "Stop being so difficult" Nick says. I sigh, giving up. "Then get off me" I grumble. He gets off, watching me closly. I take them.

Somthing feels like its lifted from me after a couple seconds. My mind foggs, and I suddenly feel exausded. I lay back down on the bed, and fall asleep.

When I get up, I honestly don't know what day it is. Only Alice is in the room this time, shes on her bed, reading a magizne. I look out the window, its morning. "Okay, what day is it?" I ask, sitting up. Alice looks over at me. "Its Thursday" she says. Thursday? Then I must have slept through Wednesday.

Why did I sleep so long? I think back...Oh...now I rember. I don't think about it. "Lets get somthing