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Mom I'm so sorry I said any of that stuff. I do know why dad left. I do know why you still go by Mrs. And I do know why you do that job. It's just. I was ticked off and upset. Can you forgive me?"
"Of course I can Sweety. I'm so sorry I've been trying to turn you into something you're not. I know you don't like any of those things. Can you forgive me?"
"Yeah Mom I can. So. How badly is my ankle broken?"
"Well you're going to be on crutches for a month. Just be lucky about your head. The doctor said a couple centimeters lower and you would have lost an eye."
"UUUGGGHHH!!! This is not what I need. Clarissa is going to torture me. I can hear it now. 'Hey Crutches! How's the head?' She'll kill me Mom!"
"Oh now don't be so dramatic. She won't kill you."
"Mom. Third grade? The monkey bars. My arm still won't unbend all the way!"
"You know that was an accident Martha."
"She told me she was going to do right before she did it! She has it out for me! I don't know why but ever since I started hanging out with Ryan and Jake she's hated my guts. Before that she just ignored me!"
"Well I don't know what to tell you. Just stay close to Ryan and you'll be fine."
"What about Jake?"
"Even if he does make a full recovery, he won't be there for the rest of the year."
"Oh my gosh! Why does every thing happen to me?!?"
Just as my mom was about to say something a bunch of alarms started going off. Suddenly I heard a voice over some speakers.
"We have a situation in the ICU wing. Room 458. I repeat. We have a situation in the ICU wing. Room 458. A patient in critical condition has stopped breathing."
I looked desperately at my mom. The look on her face told me that it was Jake's room. I started crying and my mom came and held me.
"It's going to be okay. It could be a mistake. Maybe it's a different room. Or it's just a drill."
"No! Why? I want to go see him as soon as possible. I don't want the last time to see him to be on the bus when I thought he was dead."
"Okay Sweetheart. As soon as we can I'll have a nurse get a wheel chair and we'll go down there and see him."
After I heard the alarms stop I calmed down a little. I calmed down even more when Stacey and Ryan came in.
"Hey Mar. What you doing?" Ryan said happily. Since he was this happy I figured Jake was fine.
"Hoping that Clarissa won't try and murder me like she did in third grade. Say umm. Was that Jake's room that all the alarms went off for?"
"What? Oh no! It was the room right next to that. But Jake isn't doing that good. I guess you're going to want and see him?"
"Yeah. Just in case. You know."
"Yeah. I'll get the nurse." with that Ryan walked out of the room.
"All right. Help me out of this bed." I said some what bossily to my mom and sister.
"Okay. Let's help her. Give us your arms."
I slung my arms over their shoulders so they could support me. In a few seconds Ryan came back with a nurse and a wheel chair. My mom and sister helped me sit down in it while Ryan got a blanket to cover me up since the hospital gown wasn't that decent. It was short and kind of see through. After that the nurse wheeled me out of the room and down to Jake's room. My sister got the door so I could get through. As soon as we went in I saw Jake laying there. He seemed like he was just sleeping. But I knew that wasn't it. He was in a coma. And it was one he might not come back out of. I felt so helpless. Why couldn't all these things stop happening to me?
I suddenly heard the rhythmitic beeping of the machine start to fade. I instantly knew what was going on.
"Get me out of here. " I told the nurse frantically. She looked at my mom who started shaking her head yes.
As we headed out I heard the machine go from 'beep... beep... beep...' to a flat line. Suddenly a bunch of people came rushing in. The nurse expertly manuevered me out of the way and into the hall. As we headed back to my room I heard them working with the shock paddles. I didn't want to hear it any more so I covered my ears and closed my eyes.
I apparently dozed off a little because the next thing I knew Ryan was shaking me.
"Mar! Martha! Wake up!"
"Huh what?!?" I said frantically. I think I may have punched him in the face because I suddenly heard him grunt in pain. "Oh Ryan! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!?"
"Yeah. I'm fine. What about you? You fell asleep."
"I'm fine. Umm... What about? What about Jake?"
The look on his face told me instantly. I had lost one of my bestfriends and my first boyfriend.
"Oh my God! He's dead! I can't believe this! Why? How?"
"They don't know. They're trying to figure out. They figure his heart just gave out because of all of the things. Or one of his broken ribs punctured a lung. I'm so sorry Mar. I know how much he meant to you."
"Thaknks Ryan. But that doesen't change anything. I just want to go back to bed."
"Okay. Here. Put your arms up around my neck." I did as I was told and he lifted me up with absolutely no problem at all. "Wow. You need to put on a couple of pounds Mar. You're about the weight of like three carts."
"Don't worry about it. Just get me in the bed."
"Okay. There. Here's your blanket. Now just call if you need anything."
"Thanks again Ryan. I'll do that. Promise me you'll stay nearby?"
"I promise." and suddenly he did something I hadn't expected. He bent over and kissed me on the cheek. He blused a bright cherry red and walked out of the room. I decided not to think much about it. And with that last odd thought in my head, I drifted off into a fitful sleep.

Chapter Eleven

I see Jake running towards me on a bus. Suddenly it starts sliding off the road. Jake falls and cracks his head off a seat. Oh my God. He's turning white. Wait. Why is my mom and sister here? Why are they taking him away. NO! Bring him back!
I suddenly sat up in bed with Ryan standing over me. I felt cold and clammy. And my head hurt like freaking hell.
"What the freak Mar. You had me scared half to death! Let me guess. Another nightmare?"
"Yeah. I'm sorry. Did I wake you?"
"No. I just came in. Your mom said I could just come on up. You know it's been a week. I know you miss him but these dreams can't continue. Are you taking your meds?"
"Yes. Dude trust me. I am not arguing with my mom on that. And yes. I am going to therapy and checking with the school counselor every day at school. Dude. You've got to quit worrying so much."
"How can I do that when I love you like crazy?"
"I don't know. Now get out of my room will ya? I know you're my boy friend and all but the PJs I have on are not something that you or any one else should see."
"Oh all right. I'll be out in the hall."
"Okay. I'll be out in a minute."
He walked out of the room still looking kind of nervous. I knew he worried about me but I wish he wouldn't check on me every day. And I really wish my mom wouldn't let him come up here while I was still asleep. I mean. What if i wasn't? What if I was naked? That would be very awkward.
I pushed that thought out of my head, grabbed my crutches, and got up. The school let me go without my uniform skirt and let me wear pants because of my cast. Well pretty much all the kids on that bus were in casts or not even back in school yet.
'No.' I told myself mentally. 'Quit thinking about that. It's over and in the past. Get dressed and get out there. You don't want to be late for school.'
I went to my closet grabbed my clothes and changed. After getting on my shoe and putting a sock over my cast, I grabbed my bag and went into the hall way.
"You ready to go Mar?" Ryan asked me still looking slightly worried.
"Yeah. Let's go."
He grabbed my bag so I could use my crutches. Unfortunately the stairs in my house were really narrow so Ryan had to walk infront of me instead of beside like we did at school. The teachers made it so that he would be with me in every class. No matter what anybody said. I was glad that they had taken the time to make arrangements for me but that didn't stop the fact that Clarissa was still being a bitch to me.
"So. Are you looking forward to school today?" my mom asked us when we got down the stairs and into the living room?
"Mom? Are you seriously asking that? One more stupid question and I just may shove something down your throat."
"Now Mar. Be nice to your mom."
"Okay. I'm sorry Mom. You ready to go Ryan?"
"Yep. See ya later Mrs. Kindler."
"Now Ryan. How many times do I have to tell you? Just call me Jane."
"Okay. See ya later Jane. Come on Mar. We're taking my car."
"All righty then. Bye Mom!"
Ryan helped me out to the car and threw our bags in the back.
"So. Are you ready to go back and see every one?"
"Do you want me to shove something down your throat too?"
"Sorry. Shutting up now."
"Okay. I'm sorry Ryan. I just haven't been getting much sleep lately."
"Okay. Oh. We're here. Ready?"
"Ryan..."
"Sorry."
With that we walked into the school together. I was happy that we were aloud to take our bags from class to class. I wanted to avoind contact with Clarissa as much as possible. And the fact that her locker was right next to mine didn't help anything. Well. It's time to go back to my own personal hell.

Chapter Twelve

We walked into the school and were immediatly met by a mob of people. They were all asking how Ryan and I were doing and if we needed anything. We both answered fine and we didn't need anything. Ryan grabbed me close and led us through the crowd of students. They weren't breaking very well until someone cleared their throat. I knew who it was immediatly.
"Ryan?"
"I'm here. Don't worry Mar."
"Well... well... well... Look who's back. It's Crutches and her bodygaurd. How are you guys? Still recuperating from your faked accident? Or did you go far enought to actually hurt yourself? You know what. I bet you made that bus crash just to get all this attention."
Ryan was standing infront of me protectively. That was how it had always been. Jake would stand behind me and hold my hands while Ryan was infront of me. They knew I could break bones but refused to break them. Unfortunately every one else knew it too.
"Clarissa back off."
"Why? I like messing
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