The Awkward Age - Henry James (ap literature book list .txt) š
- Author: Henry James
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No collapse of Mr. Longdonās was ever incompatible with his sitting well forward. āāAgainā?ā
āDo you look so blank,ā she demanded, ābecause youāve really forgotten the gratitude I expressed to you when you were so good as to bring Nanda up for Aggieās marriage?āor because you donāt think it a matter I should trouble myself to return to? How can I help it,ā she went on without waiting for his answer, āif I see your hand in everything that has happened since the so interesting talk I had with you last summer at Mertle? There have been times when Iāve really thought of writing to you; Iāve even had a bold bad idea of proposing myself to you for a Sunday. Then the crisis, my momentary alarm, has struck me as blowing over, and Iāve felt I could wait for some luck like this, which would sooner or later come.ā Her companion, however, appeared to leave the luck so on her hands that she could only snatch up, to cover its nudity, the next handsomest assumption. āI see you cleverly guess that what Iāve been worried about is the effect on Mrs. Brook of the loss of her dear Mitchy. If youāve not at all events had your own impression of this effect, isnāt that only because these last months youāve seen so little of her? IāVE seen,ā said the Duchess, āenough and to spare.ā She waited as if for her vision, on this, to be flashed back at her, but the only result of her speech was that her friend looked hard at somebody else. It was just this symptom indeed that perhaps sufficed her, for in a minute she was again afloat. āThings have turned out so much as I desire them that I should really feel wicked not to have a humble heart. Thereās a quarter indeed,ā she added with a noble unction, āto which I donāt fear to say for myself that no day and no night pass without my showing it. However, you English, I know, donāt like one to speak of oneās religion. Iām just as simply thankful for mineāI mean with as little sense of indecency or agony about itāas I am for my health or my carriage. My point is at any rate that I say in no cruel spirit of triumph, yet do none the less very distinctly say, that the person Mr. Mitchettās marriage has inevitably pleased least may be now rather to be feared.ā These words had the sound of a climax, and she had brought them out as if, with her duty done, to leave them; but something that took place, for her eye, in the face Mr. Longdon had half-averted gave her after an instant what he might have called her second wind. āOh I know you think she always HAS been! But youāve exaggeratedāas to that; and I donāt say that even at present itās anything we shanāt get the better of. Only we must keep our heads. We must remember that from her own point of view she has her grievance, and we must at least look as if we trusted her. That, you know, is what youāve never quite done.ā
He gave out a murmur of discomfort which produced in him a change of position, and the sequel to the change was that he presently accepted from his cushioned angle of the sofa the definite support it could offer. If his eyes moreover had not met his companionās they had been brought by the hand he repeatedly and somewhat distressfully passed over them closer to the question of which of the alien objects presented to his choice it would cost him least to profess to handle. What he had already paid, a spectator would easily have gathered from the long, the suppressed wriggle that had ended in his falling back, was some sacrifice of his habit of not privately depreciating those to whom he was publicly civil. It was plain, however, that when he presently spoke his thought had taken a stretch. āIām sure Iāve fully intended to be everything thatās proper. But I donāt think Mr. Vanderbank cares for her.ā
It kindled in the Duchess an immediate light. āVous avez bien de lāesprit. You put one at oneās ease. Iāve been vaguely groping while youāre already there. Itās really only for Nanda he cares?ā
āYesāreally.ā
The Duchess debated. āAnd yet exactly how much?ā
āI havenāt asked him.ā
She had another, a briefer pause. āDonāt you think it about time you SHOULD?ā Once more she waited, then seemed to feel her opportunity wouldnāt. āWeāve worked a bit together, but you donāt take me into your confidence. I dare say you donāt believe Iām quite straight. Donāt you really see how I MUST be?ā She had a pleading note which made him at last more consentingly face her. āDonāt you see,ā she went on with the advantage of it, āthat, having got all I want for myself, I havenāt a motive in the world for spoiling the fun of another? I donāt want in the least, I assure you, to spoil even Mrs. Brookās; for how will she get a bit less out of himāI mean than she does nowāif what you desire SHOULD take place? Honestly, my dear man, thatās quite what I desire, and I only want, over and above, to help you. What I feel for Nanda, believe me, is pure pity. I wonāt say Iām frantically grateful to her, because in the long runāone way or anotherāsheāll have found her account. It nevertheless worries me to see her; and all the more because of this very certitude, which youāve so kindly just settled for me, that our young man hasnāt really with her motherāā
Whatever the certitude Mr. Longdon had kindly settled, it was in another interest that he at this moment broke in. āIs he YOUR young man too?ā
She was not too much amused to cast about her.
āArenāt such marked ornaments of life a little the property of all who admire and enjoy them?ā
āYou āenjoyā him?ā Mr. Longdon asked in the same straightforward way.
āImmensely.ā
His silence for a little seemed the sign of a plan. āWhat is it he hasnāt done with Mrs. Brook?ā
āWell, the thing that WOULD be the complication. He hasnāt gone beyond a certain point. You may ask how one knows such matters, but Iām afraid Iāve not quite a receipt for it. A woman knows, but she canāt tell. They havenāt done, as itās called, anything wrong.ā
Mr. Longdon frowned. āIt would be extremely horrid if they had.ā
āAh but, for you and me who know life, it isnāt THAT thatāif other things had made for itāwould have prevented! As it happens, however, weāve got off easily. She doesnāt speak to himā!ā
She had forms he could only take up. āāSpeakā to himā?ā
āWhy as much as she would have liked to be able to believe.ā
āThen whereās the danger of which you appear to wish to warn me?ā
āJust in her feeling in the case as most women would feel. You see she did what she could for her daughter. She did, Iām bound to say, as that sort of thing goes among you people, a good deal. She treasured up, she nursed along Mitchy, whom she would also, though of course not so much, have liked herself. Nanda could have kept him on with a word, becoming thereby so much the less accessible for YOUR plan. That would have thoroughly obliged her mother, but your little English girls, in these altered timesāoh I know how you feel them!ādonāt stand on such trifles; andāeven if you think it odd of meāI canāt defend myself, though Iāve so directly profited, against a certain compassion also for Mrs. Brookās upset. As a good-natured woman I feel in short for both of them. I deplore all round whatās after all a rather sad relation. Only, as I tell you, Nandaās the one, I naturally say to myself, for me now most to think of; if I donāt assume too much, that is, that you donāt suffer by my freedom.ā
Mr. Longdon put by with a mere drop of his eyes the question of his suffering: there was so clearly for him an issue more relevant. āWhat do you know of my āplanā?ā
āWhy, my dear man, havenāt I told you that ever since Mertle Iāve made out your hand? What on earth for other people can your action look like but an adoption?ā
āOfāaāHIM?ā
āYouāre delightful. OfāaāHER! If it does come to the same thing for you, so much the better. That at any rate is what weāre all taking it for, and Mrs. Brook herself en tete. She seesāthrough your generosityā Nandaās life more or less, at the worst, arranged for, and thatās just what gives her a good conscience.ā
If Mr. Longdon breathed rather hard it seemed to show at least that he followed. āWhat does she want of a good conscience?ā
From under her high tiara an instant she almost looked down at him. āAh you do hate her!ā
He coloured, but held his ground. āDonāt you tell me yourself sheās to be feared?ā
āYes, and watched. Butāif possibleāwith amusement.ā
āAmusement?ā Mr. Longdon faintly gasped.
āLook at her now,ā his friend went on with an indication that was indeed easy to embrace. Separated from them by the width of the room, Mrs. Brook was, though placed in profile, fully presented; the satisfaction with which she had lately sunk upon a light gilt chair marked itself as superficial and was moreover visibly not confirmed by the fact that Vanderbankās high-perched head, arrested before her in a general survey of opportunity, kept her eyes too far above the level of talk. Their companions were dispersed, some in the other room, and for the occupants of the Duchessās sofa they made, as a couple in communion, a picture, framed and detached, vaguely reduplicated in the high polish of the French floor. āShe IS tremendously pretty.ā The Duchess appeared to drop this as a plea for indulgence and to be impelled in fact by the interlocutorās silence to carry it further. āIāve never at all thought, you know, that Nanda touches her.ā
Mr. Longdon demurred. āDo you mean for beauty?ā
His friend, for his simplicity, discriminated. āAh theyāve neither of them ābeauty.ā Thatās not a word to make free with. But the mother has grace.ā
āAnd the daughter hasnāt
āNot a line. You answer me of course, when I say THAT, you answer me with your adored Lady Julia, and will want to know what then becomes of the lucky resemblance. I quite grant you that Lady Julia must have had the thing we speak of. But that dear sweet blessed thing is very much the same lost secret as the dear sweet blessed OTHER thing that went away with itāthe decent leisure that, for the most part, weāve also seen the last of. Itās the thing at any rate that poor Nanda and all her kind have most effectually got rid of. Oh if youād trust me a little more youād see that Iām quite at one with you on all the changes for the worse. I bear up, but Iām old enough to have known. All the same Mrs. Brook has somethingāsay what you likeāwhen she bends that little brown head. Dieu sait comme elle se coiffe, but what she gets out of it! Only look.ā
Mr. Longdon conveyed in
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