Callisto 2.0 - Susan English (sad books to read .txt) 📗
- Author: Susan English
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I had no idea what it was like to kiss a man, but kissing a woman was like nothing else in the Universe. A small part of me envied Hadley. I hadn’t kissed a woman since Olivia.
“And the flowers were so beautiful.”
“Who else but an engineer would have given you holographic flowers?” I smiled at 113
the thought.
◆◆◆
Later that afternoon, I took a break and headed to Naomi’s lab, wanting to tell her about Hadley and Andrea. I found her huddled on the couch, arms wrapped around her chest.
“Naomi, what happened? What’s the matter?” I hurried to sit beside her.
“It’s Evan, he ended things with me.”
“Naomi,” Annie’s voice filled the room, “are you certain you don’t want me to call Doctor Gamon?”
“No, Annie, Doc can’t mend a broken heart.”
“Okay, Naomi, but please let me know if I can do anything for you.”
Naomi shook her head and looked at me. “Annie’s concerned about me.”
“I am, too, Naomi.” I put my arms around her. “Tell me what happened.”
“Evan, he—he’s seeing someone else.” She buried her face in my chest, and I held her tighter. “He says he’s in love.” Her voice was muffled.
I rubbed her back with the palm of my hand as her tears soaked my jumpsuit. She shifted away from me and I released her, searching her face. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered.
Naomi wiped her eyes with one hand. Globules of tears floated away. “I don’t even understand why I’m weeping. It isn’t as if we had a future together, a real one. And we always had an open relationship, you know.”
I nodded, even though, in fact, I hadn’t known.
“We both knew we weren’t meant to last.”
“But still, it hurts.”
“It does.” She sniffed loudly.
“I have gossip, if you want to hear it.”
Naomi perked up. “Spill the tea, sister! Help me get out of my head.”
“Hadley and Andrea, it’s official.”
Naomi’s doleful expression transformed into a smile. “About time.”
I looked at her, struck by what an extraordinary woman she was. Even with her heart broken, she still felt joy for other people’s happiness. “I’m sorry about Evan.”
“Thanks, Calli.” Her smile faded. “I’m blessed to have you.”
◆◆◆
Naomi’s breakup with Evan hit her hard. We spent hours on the couch in her lab, holding the mice and talking about relationships.
When I told her I hadn’t been with anyone since Olivia, she couldn’t believe it.
“How can that be true? You’re incredibly attractive!”
“Aw, thanks Naomi.”
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“I’d be into you if I weren’t hetero.”
“Come on, we both know that’s a lie. Our relationship is one hundred percent in the friend category. Even if you took some kind of pill to change your sexual orientation overnight, it would never happen. You’re like my sister.”
“Do those pills exist? Please, sign me up!”
I laughed.
“You’re right,” she said. “We’re much like sisters, the two of us. Though for you, that’s an awful long time to be single.”
“It’s true, but until my infatuation with Diana—” I felt the heat in my face, and Naomi patted my thigh, “I hadn’t even thought about it, not really. I was married to my work.”
“Yeah, I know how it can be. Even so, wouldn’t it be nice to have someone special in your life?”
“I have you, Naomi.”
She leaned over to give me a quick hug. “It’s true. We don’t need the troubles of romance.”
“Exactly.”
“Though it would be lovely,” she added wistfully.
“How are you doing, really?” I studied her face. “Are you still sad about Evan?”
“Yeah, maybe I am.”
“I figured as much.”
“Even though I knew we weren’t the right match, my heart held on to hope.”
“Ah yes, that pesky hope.”
“I doubt if I’d even meet someone else. It isn’t like I have plenty of interaction with men.”
“Not here, anyway.”
Naomi examined her hands resting in her lap. “I’m thinking of making myself a profile on a virtual dating site.”
“That’s a great idea.”
She looked up at me hopefully. “You don’t think it’s too soon?”
“You said yourself you and Evan weren’t meant to be together in the long run, so why not? You can think of your relationship with him as a warm-up for something deeper.”
Her face brightened. “I think I’ll give it a go.”
“What have you got to lose?”
◆◆◆
Since that day, Naomi had gone on a few “virtual” dates with men living on the Moon (Earth was too unreasonably far), but there was no one she was particularly interested in.
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At dinner one evening, Naomi lamented, “Like I said earlier, I swear Izumi and Diana ruined it for me as far as relationships go.”
“Come on, Naomi, I’m sure it wasn’t always like that with them,” I said, thinking of my conversation with Izumi in the gym. “Relationships are more than just love, they take a real commitment to work things out, and mutual respect. Those things take time to cultivate.”
“How did you get so wise in the ways of the world, Miss Celibate-for-Five-Plus-Years?”
I laughed. “All theory, my friend. And we both know the difference between theory and practice is sometimes astronomical.”
Naomi laughed. “Isn’t that the truth?”
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Things were stagnating with the warp drive research. It had been five weeks since the testing of the prototype, five grueling weeks of knocking our heads against the wall, with nothing to show for it except crushing disappointment. My peace and tranquility from a few weeks before had all but disappeared. I had been going later and later to the gym, so I barely saw Izumi, and my visits with Naomi and the mice were few and far between. I was too anxious to relax. If we hadn’t been so very close, maybe our inability to move forward wouldn’t be so disappointing.
One morning, after a half-hearted workout, I dragged myself to the lab to find Hadley and Andrea cuddling on the couch. My temper flared. How could Hadley be enjoying herself when there was so much work to be done?
“Hi Calli,” said Andrea, and Hadley smiled at me, then buried her face in Andrea’s neck.
I nodded to them and pushed my way over to my console. When Hadley giggled, I gritted my teeth. How was anyone supposed to concentrate with all that noise? Why couldn’t they go somewhere else? I tried to focus on the same equation I had been staring at for at least a week without a glimmer of inspiration, but then Andrea laughed this time, and my blood boiled in my veins. I sat seething, staring at my computer screen.
“Okay, sweetie,” Andrea said, “I need to get to work.”
Yeah, about time someone besides me thought about work.
“No, not yet,” pleaded Hadley. “Stay a little while longer.”
Please, just go already. I glared at the backs of their heads, as if the force of my will alone could make Andrea leave.
“Marta is expecting me, but I’ll see you tonight.”
“Oh, okay,” said Hadley, pushing herself off the couch and following Andrea to the door. They shared a long kiss, and, finally, Andrea left.
I pretended to write in my notebook as Hadley made her way to her console. A little while later she said, “Hey Calli, want to go over the collapse data with me again, see if there’s something, anything we might have missed?”
“We’ve already gone through it,” I said, my tone harsh. “I don’t see the point.”
“Okay.” She shrugged and turned back to her screen.
I got up, and went to the door, pulling it open with more force than necessary, and propelled myself into the hallway. What was wrong with me? Nothing was going right.
I went to my quarters, thankful to not have run into anyone, and zipped myself into my sleeping bag. It wasn’t just Hadley, everything seemed to put me on edge. Why couldn’t we figure out the collapse? What weren’t we seeing? There was an answer, I knew there was, so why couldn’t we find it? That evening, stomach rumbling, I ate two energy bars I had stashed in my room. Why bother to go all the way to the dining room? It was Friday, but I wasn’t about to go to the social, to pretend to be happy. With the exception 117
of my first Friday on Shambhala, it was my first time to miss it.
◆◆◆
The following afternoon Diana and I crossed paths in the farm corridor where I had been wandering aimlessly.
“Calli! I’ve been looking for you.”
“Hi, Diana,” I said in a subdued voice, grabbing onto the rail to stop my forward motion.
“Listen, I have a proposition for you.”
I cocked my head, waiting.
“I know you’ve been feeling dissatisfied with your research.”
My cheeks burned. “Is it that obvious?”
“Oh, my dear, we all go through it, trust me. What I’ve found helps me is a change of scenery.”
“I’m listening.”
“Why don’t you go to the lunar facility, Arcadia, for a few weeks?”
My jaw dropped with the realization that this was exactly what I needed. “Diana, you are a genius!”
Diana laughed. “Okay, for the sake of full disclosure, Izumi was the one who suggested it.”
“A collective genius then, you and Izumi.” A trip to the Moon! Why hadn’t I thought of that?
She laughed again. “Tomorrow is Sunday, so the Moon shuttle will be leaving at twelve-thirty p.m. Shall I tell Sook to save you a seat?”
“Yes, please!” My mind was already racing, the cloud of depression lifting. “Thanks, Diana.”
I went straight to the lab to tell Hadley the news, and found her working at her console.
“Oh, hi, Calli.” She looked up and rubbed her eyes.
“Hey, I wanted to let you know I’ll be gone for a week or two. I’m going to spend some time on the Moon, recharge my batteries.”
“Hmm, let me guess, Izumi’s?”
“How did you know?” I shook my head. “That woman has a sixth sense. It’s almost scary, except she’s so sweet and kind-hearted.”
“Imagine if she used her powers for evil and not good. We’d all be in deep trouble.”
I hesitated, looking down at my feet, then met Hadley’s eyes. “Hey, sorry if I’ve been short with you lately.”
“You’ve been as
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