The Blind Date by Landish, Lauren (free children's ebooks pdf txt) 📗

go first. But the change in plans doesn’t bother me the way it once would. I can adapt now. Riley taught me how to do that.

“I’m sorry too,” I say. “I love you.”

“Oh, my God, I love you too!” Riley exclaims. She throws herself at me, arms going around my neck in a tight hug with her head on my shoulder. It’s not heated, not a precursor to make-up sex. It’s simply relief and reassurance that this is real.

My hands wrap around her waist, and I hug her back just as tightly. I need to feel her against me, know that we’re going to repair the damage we’ve both done.

Words fail me, and I just hold her for a long minute until I feel a wet nose pushing against my ankle. I look down to see Raffy nosing at my pants leg. “Rowf!”

“I missed you too. Who’s my good boy?” I ask when Raffy shoves his way between our legs. I pet his head, scratching behind his ears before I tell him, “Let me talk to your mama for a few minutes, okay?”

He licks my hand affectionately, and Riley pets him absently too.

“Can we start over?” I ask when we meet eyes again. Riley nods, letting me speak. I gather my thoughts, all the practiced bits of speech that’ve been rolling through my mind all day. “We have a lot to unpack, but . . . I shouldn’t have sprung the whole BlindDate sponsorship on you like that. When Elisa first mentioned it, my automatic answer was no. I want you to know that.” Riley looks understanding, so I continue.

“But the more she talked about it, the better it sounded. BlindDate has been my focus for a long time now. I’ve put my heart and soul, blood, sweat, and tears into that app, all with the hope that with it, I would make something of myself while also helping people make connections. It means a lot to me. Fuck, until recently, BlindDate has meant everything to me. But I only wanted you to consider Elisa’s offer. I never wanted to pressure you. I know what Riley Sunshine means to you and how hard you’ve worked to create it from the ground up. It just seemed like the deal might be good for us both, and I got excited.”

“I do know how much BlindDate means to you, Noah,” Riley says as she takes my hands. “I didn’t mean to insult you or your work. I don’t think dating apps are for losers or anything awful like that. I should’ve never thought that, much less said it. It was my insecurity speaking—no, screaming at me—inside my heart.”

“I shouldn’t have walked away. No matter what you said or I said, that is something I said I’d never do. I won’t be like my dad, Riley. I promise you that.” The vow is weighted with significance, and I press my lips to the back of Riley’s hand to seal that promise.

“You’re nothing like him. He walked out and kept on walking, leaving behind his responsibilities and commitments without a look back. We had a fight, and even if you walked away for a moment, you’re showing up now to do the hardest work of all, to take responsibility, talk through the hard stuff, and forgive me for my mistakes too. You are nothing like your dad, Noah. I don’t even know him, but I know that. You are a good man.”

“That’s one I haven’t heard. I think most people see me as a cold, driven, workaholic asshole. Only you see me as good. But you see everything, everyone that way. That’s one of the things I love about you.”

Riley’s lips twist. “I’ve been doing some thinking on that too. I got so caught up in Riley Sunshine, that image of positivity, that I tried to maintain it at any cost. And the truth is . . . sometimes I’m lonely, or angry, or judgmental, and I shouldn’t gloss over that, pretending it doesn’t happen in favor of some false reality that doesn’t exist.”

She squirms like the words are trying to wiggle their way out of her. “My fear overwhelmed me. Fear that you were using me . . . because I’ve had people try to befriend Riley Sunshine to benefit themselves. Fear that people would judge me for not being perfect. Fear that by needing help, I wasn’t good enough to be a positive influence for other people.”

“But you burst through that fear. I’ve seen the video of you talking to your followers and read a lot of the comments today. You took on the naysayers and turned the tables on them.”

“You watched the apology video?” she asks uncertainly.

“You did say you’re sorry, but what I watched was a rebirth of Riley Sunshine, a better, more real you. That’s what I saw,” I reassure her.

Her smile is soft, blooming in millimeters until it’s her full-wattage one that blinds me with its beauty. “Thank you,” she whispers.

“Did we do it?” I tease, lighter now that we both seem to have said what’s been weighing on our hearts. “Did we have a conversation about how we fucked up and how we’re going to do better?”

“I think we did,” she says with a quiet giggle. “I want you to know that I’m always going to be positive and perky, with a big dose of sunshine. But I’ll be real about things too. I’ll share with you, not push down anything negative and pretend it doesn’t exist.”

“Good. I want you . . . Riley Watson, not Riley Sunshine. Though she’s pretty hot.” I let my eyes trace down her body, hoping she can feel the weight of my gaze. “And I’m still going to be an asshole who works too much. But I’ll find a balance so you never have to worry where my priorities lie. Because you are my number-one priority, always.”

“I promise to trust you so that even when your fears are at their biggest and you need a minute, I’ll know that you’ll come back to