The Girl Who Dared to Think by Bella Forrest (best novels of all time TXT) 📗

on her lips. I hid my face behind Grey as I felt it turning bright red. Grey didn’t turn around until he was certain I was ready—something I was eternally grateful for. When I was, he made sure to grab my hand before turning.

Cali’s smile had only grown, and facing her now, I could see that she was genuinely amused by the two of us. She held up the blankets she was holding, and Grey let go of my hand long enough to take them.

“Relax,” she said. “You’re both adults—I can’t stop you from getting involved with each other. But Tian runs around here all the time, and I’d prefer not to expose her, just as I’d assume you’d rather not be exposed. So, just try to be more circumspect in future, all right?”

I nodded, while Grey said, “All right.”

Cali grinned, the corners of her eyes wrinkling, and then turned to leave. “Good night!” she called over her shoulder.

“Good night,” we said together.

When she was halfway up the stairs, Grey turned to me. “Are you... I mean... How are you?”

My cheeks, still red from the embarrassment of Cali catching us and calling us out like that, started to inflame again, and it was getting painful. I let go of his hand and began massaging them with my fingertips.

“Incredibly embarrassed,” I told him after a second.

“Because Cali caught us?”

I hesitated, and then shook my head. “Not exactly. I... I mean we...” I trailed off, flustered. How could I explain that I was a little afraid of how I just... reacted with him? To him? It was like someone had flipped a switch and I had lost all semblance of control. It was intimidating, and I didn’t know how to process it on top of this already crazy day.

“Hey, hey.” He stepped close, and placed his hands on my shoulders, instantly trying to console me. “It’s okay... I think I get it. It’s been a long day, and a whole lot has happened.”

“Yes,” I breathed, instantly relieved that he understood. “I just need some time to think and process and... come to terms with everything, I guess.” I twisted around to face him. “Is that okay?”

“Of course it is,” he said gently. “I’m sorry for—”

“Don’t apologize,” I interrupted, pressing my fingers to his lips. He gave me a confused look, and I smiled. “It would be like you were apologizing for kissing me in the first place, and I don’t want you to... I don’t want you to feel sorry about that.”

His expression softened, and I sensed the moment threatening to return, and diverted it by taking a small step back. “I’m gonna head to bed, I think,” I said, swallowing hard, and he nodded, moving away a few paces over to his hammock. I felt the need to add something, so I did: “Thanks for giving me a little time.”

“My pleasure—just don’t think I’m going to let it go,” Grey said, sitting back into his hammock like an old pro. He met my gaze, a confident smile playing on his lips. “Because I’m not.”

My heart continued its heavy drumming against my ribcage, and I quickly lashed up the few feet to my own hammock and gingerly climbed into it, needing some space between myself and that cocky, enigmatic face, lest I cave.

But Cali was right, and I wasn’t ready to just... fall into bed with a guy I barely knew. You know all that you need to know, my mind whispered, but I shoved it aside. I wasn’t that girl, and we had barely started acknowledging our attraction to each other. I needed for this to go slowly.

“Good night,” Grey’s voice said teasingly from below. “Here.” Something flew up from below, spinning up and over and landing with a thump on top of my chest—the blanket that Cali had brought in.

“’Night,” I called down quickly, needing there to be an end to everything. I held my breath and waited, hearing the fabric rustle as he lay back into his hammock a few feet below. I waited for things to go still, before finally starting to get ready for bed.

I quickly shrugged out of my uniform and spread out the woolen blanket that Grey had just tossed up, curling up under it. It took me a few minutes to figure out how to adjust my limbs and lie in the hammock, but I finally found a comfortable position. The hammock swayed back and forth, and I stared out the window for a long time, using my arms as pillows. I thought about everything that had happened today, and about what the next step might be. I thought about Zoe. I thought about my parents and Alex. I searched for ways out of this mess.

Long before the answers came, my eyelids grew too heavy to resist the draw of sleep, so I gave up trying.

29

I spent most of my first day in Sanctum in my hammock, fast asleep. It was, admittedly, not the wisest move to make, considering the situation, but it was as if everything had just suddenly caught up with me. I’d spent weeks not sleeping properly, barely eating, and just clinging onto the ledge with every fingertip dug in tight. Now that it felt like I was out of sight of the Tower, I could finally breathe. Sleep was the only natural recourse after that.

As a result, the first day there was a blur that consisted of two bathroom breaks, some sort of salad that contained an inordinate amount of tomatoes for some reason, and a visit from Grey (and that was to deliver said salad, as I had slept through dinner).

The second day there, I got sick. There was no rhyme or reason, save that my system was still rundown enough that a virus could sneak its way past my defenses. I must have brought it with me when we came down. I knew something was wrong when I woke up in a sweat, my joints aching with