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her.

Not an Astor or horsemen or victim or survivor—just hers, forever.

Her blue eyes seemed to be layered in shades of blue and hints of gold, this warmth that seemed happy with scar tissue that was simply decorating her creamy skin.

I killed her demons, now she was going to kill the last of mine.

The guys walked in behind me, ruining the moment like they always did. I didn’t bother turning around. I was busy begging and worshipping Eve at the same time.

Khaos spoke first, “Oh thank god. That secret was killing me.”

I watched Eve smile to herself, softening against someone who used to bring out something much more pointed in her than just a smile. Whispering just to Eve, I looked up at her, “Careful, Princess, he might get the wrong idea and then we’ll be stuck with him forever. We just want this little one in here forever.”

Holding her palm in my hand, her smile twisted into a smirk. “Or Vic will just get jealous you have two best friends.”

Vic stood next to the couch still in the apron, now bloody, pulling the black latex gloves off. I could feel the stun in how quiet he was being; I could hear a pin drop through all the judgment coating the air. I knew exactly what they were thinking: how is the cult fuck up and glorified drunk going to raise a child.

Finally, Vic swallowed in a hard way that assaulted my senses. “How are we fixing this? There has to be a way to fix this. We have to find a solution for this if you’re doing… that...” his voice was always flat and responsible but this time was different. It was determined and concerned for the reason I was crying in a way no one has ever seen.

Not even when Braeden died.

I didn’t realize me being broken breaks everyone around me until this sobering moment.

Looking over my shoulder, I tossed out the only solution I had—destroy the problem like I always do. Only this one wasn’t a dead body, it’s a whole island that belongs to a cult. “Burn down the island.”

I didn’t know if I was still drunk or just as determined to slay my demons now that Eve was pregnant. That news alone can motivate you in ways you don’t expect.

I couldn’t fuck up my kid like I was fucked up.

Khaos smirked, jumping over the couch and landing on his ass. “I’m all for burning shit down but Bowen doesn’t fly…”

He wasn’t wrong.

I hated how much he knew about me without trying.

I haven’t flown since I tried to go to Denmark a few times when I turned eighteen, and I had no choice but to get plastered just to ease the nervousness of being in a tin can in the air.

Grimm looked like he was thinking when his words slithered out. “Guess you better get okay with it if that’s what it takes.”

Whatever hate he harbors will be tenfold if we go to the island and the truth comes out. A truth I buried, not because I wanted to but because I was forced to. Grimm hated me for resembling Braeden, but he was going to learn why really quickly that was simply because he was deflecting the guilt he had for something he didn’t remember.

GRIMM

I didn’t hate planes. Fuck, I didn’t even hate islands but there was something about this that made my leg bounce uncontrollably.

Abigail wasn’t here so I only had one vice left when I popped an extra Xanax.

It wasn’t going to kill me.

Maybe it would.

Anything to not be here on a plane with Conquest, War, and Famine. It just felt like a receipt for a disaster.

They were all engrossed in some kind of plan to christen Bowen while I avoided eye contact at all. I was here for moral support, not teamwork.

Khaos stepped over my legs, taking the seat next to me on the private plane. Out of all the empty seats, he chose the one next to me. “You okay? You’re sweating.”

“People sweat,” I bit off my words.

His hand landed on my thigh, giving it a squeeze through my boxer briefs. “You never sweat. Always cool as a cucumber. Separation anxiety?”

My eyes snapped to his in a mild panic like he was knocking on doors in my head that were padlocked and I didn’t even know what was inside.

I was still clutching the pill bottle in my tight fist when his eyes went wide and he tilted his head down to the bottle. “Maybe you should take some more, buddy. I think your monster is showing.”

No, my monster is strangling me from the inside out.

Twisting down on the childproof cap and spilling two more in my hand, I decided even if it did kill me at least it would be a peaceful death.

It was a short plane ride, an hour tops since we were already on the coast. The island where our highest-ranking members and inner circle line our pockets. I never thought about what goes on there until Bowen confessed to being molested and raped too many times to count.

I could feel my heart hollow and my throat thicken trying not to throw up at the thought of it.

An island the Clave owned and ran, right under our noses.

When we finally landed, I was hoping we could make this quick when I realized we had to take a boat to another island. Groaning internally, I was finally feeling the meds kick in, ironing out the wrinkles in my feelings.

Just my feelings; not the rapid speed of my heart or feeling colorless.

I felt drained already and nothing had happened.

Following the guys, taking my time, I was hoping to get lost so I could

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