The Fight In Us: A Brother's Best Friend College Romance (The Four Book 4) by Becca Steele (read me a book txt) 📗

ignored their calls and messages. My initial anger had turned to numbness, but every now and then, the stabbing pain would rage through me. Losing my mum when I was only thirteen had left a huge hole in my life, and the thought that my family and closest friends had been keeping a secret from me had really fucking hurt.

The day passed in a blur, Lena a constant presence yet giving me my own space. After she’d dragged me into the media room, that was. I zoned out, watching mindless action movies while she curled up in a chair off to the side of the room, working on her laptop. I couldn’t even remember what I ate; everything was bland and tasteless.

That night, sleep finally pulled me under sometime around 4:00 a.m., and I woke late in the morning, with the sun high in the sky.

I knew where I wanted to go.

Palming my keys in my hand, I pushed down on the latch of the wrought iron gate that led into the small hilltop cemetery. I made my way up the familiar winding path and picked my way across to the black marble headstone that marked my mum’s resting place.

Joanne Cavendish. Beloved wife and mother.

Suicide. Could I have seen the warning signs? Was there anything else I could have done?

Sinking to the ground, I leaned my head against the cool marble. “I’m sorry, Mum. Sorry I failed you. I wish I’d known. I wish…I wish things could have been different. I wish I could’ve helped you.”

By the time I’d finished speaking, my throat was raw and my eyes were stinging, swollen from the tears I’d finally given in to.

Blowing out a heavy breath, I pulled my phone from my pocket and sent a text to the one person that I knew would be there for me, the person who understood my situation and hadn’t let me down.

Me: I need you to make me forget.

When the reply came, the relief was instant.

Come to me.

The Drummond home was silent as I entered the foyer, using the key Lena had given me. I headed into the huge open lounge area, and there she was. Silhouetted against a wall of glass, the sun setting over the sea behind her, she looked…

She’d dressed down in loose black cotton trousers and a black vest top, and her ever-permanent black eye makeup was absent. As I approached her, she held up a bag, the sound of bottles clinking inside. She eyed me cautiously for a moment, before dropping her gaze, licking her lips.

Nervous. Lena was nervous?

“Want to get drunk and high?”

All I could do was nod. Although she wasn’t looking at me, she turned on her heel and headed for the doors that led out to one of the outside areas. All white stone, looking out over the sea, there was a firepit and a covered area with huge outdoor cube-shaped sofas, big enough to lie on.

She paused in the doorway. “Wait. I got your stuff. It’s in the guest room.”

“Thanks.” I’d asked her if she could persuade Cassius to bring me some of my clothes while I was at the cemetery. “I’ll grab a shower and change, then meet you out here?”

When I returned, feeling more human, Lena was curled up on one of the sofas, stretching out her legs in front of her. Glancing up at me, she patted the space next to her. Kicking off my shoes, I crawled onto the sofa and reclined back, propped up by the cushions behind me.

“West?” Her voice was low and hesitant.

I took a deep breath. “I don’t want to talk. I want to forget.”

“Okay.”

Fuck knows how much time had passed, but by the time I was feeling numb, the sky was completely dark, dotted with stars, and the only light came from the firepit and the dim glow of the lights that were inlaid into the floor, illuminating the walkways.

Finishing up the last of the joint I’d been sharing with Lena, I flicked the stub away and rolled onto my side, almost completely horizontal by this point. The alcohol and weed had left me with no fucking filter, because when I opened my mouth, what came out was “Why is it weird between us lately?”

Lena stared at me, her mouth opening and closing for a moment, before she turned back to stare up at the sky. “I don’t know.”

Propping myself up on my elbow, I reached out and ran a finger down her arm, watching with satisfaction as goosebumps pebbled along her skin.

Fuck. I shouldn’t be touching her. But I didn’t want to stop. “I do. I think you like me.”

Her breath hitched, and she squeezed her eyes shut.

My dick stirred, and I shifted my position. As much as the drinks and the weed had lowered my inhibitions around her, something was telling me that I needed to take it slow with this girl.

But, fuck.

We might never get this chance again.

“I wanted to kiss you on Friday night at the party.” I admitted the truth that I hadn’t even been able to admit to myself at the time. “Did you want me to kiss you?”

She remained silent as I let my finger trail up her arm again and onto her collarbone. Her chest rose and fell, her breath coming faster. “You’re so responsive,” I murmured, as my finger continued to journey across her collarbone, up her neck, and finally to her lips.

A tiny whimper escaped her as I traced the outline of her lips. “Guess what?” I leaned closer, my breath skating across her skin. I waited until her eyelids fluttered open again and she met my gaze. “I know I probably shouldn’t, but I really want to kiss you right now.”

A soft gasp escaped her lips; then they parted slightly, and her tongue darted out to touch the tip of my finger.

That was the only sign I needed. My hand moved to cup her jaw. “I need…I want to forget.”

I could feel