Dark Legacy by Jen Talty (reading books for 4 year olds .txt) 📗
- Author: Jen Talty
Book online «Dark Legacy by Jen Talty (reading books for 4 year olds .txt) 📗». Author Jen Talty
“I’ll consider it, depending on why you want to find to find her.”
“So, if my answer meets your requirement, then you’ll do it. Otherwise, I get pawned off?” Fuck it. She reached for her pendant, fingering it once again. It didn’t lower her heart rate, but it did stop her from wanting to tell Jackson she’d made a mistake and march into her house.
“You can look at it that way if you want. But the truth is, I want to help you. I just need to know why it’s so important to you.”
As long as she didn’t get into the details of what’d happened, that should be an easy enough question to answer. Only her mind searched for the words, and none formed.
She cleared her throat. “I was sixteen and scared shitless. In a bad situation all around.”
“I’m sorry that you had to go through that. And I don’t mean to belittle your situation, but lots of young girls find themselves pregnant and unsure of what to do. Sadly, it’s not uncommon.”
There was nothing typical about what had happened to her, but she wouldn’t go down that path. Not today.
Not ever.
Not with Jackson.
“And that doesn’t tell me anything about why you want to find her.”
“I just want to know she had a good life. That by me giving her up, I gave her a better life. Once I know that, I will step away and continue to let her live it. Hell, I don’t even want to meet her. I just need to know.”
Jackson tossed back the rest of his wine before folding his arms across his chest. “How is knowing who she is going to make you take a step back and leave her alone?”
“Wow. That’s really unfair. I’ve spent almost nineteen years knowing that I couldn’t be a good mother, and all I want—”
“You think you can be a mother now?” he asked behind a tight jaw as he jumped from the plastic chair, sending it tumbling into the grass. “I don’t understand women like you. You give up a child. Just walk away. And that’s fine. I get it, and God, I value that decision. It was the best thing my birth mother ever did for me. But then you think it’s perfectly okay to go poking around in that child’s life, expecting them to be all warm, welcoming, and grateful to see you without thinking about what that might do to the child or the families they grew up in?”
If she were in the confines of her office, she wouldn’t be shocked by the venom-laced words, and she’d be able to process his emotions from the caring yet objective perspective of a therapist.
But she’d put her heart on the line, and he’d squeezed the blood out of it like he knew what her life had been like.
“If I wanted to be beaten up emotionally for giving up a child, I would be having this conversation with my own mother. I don’t want to find her to make a mommy connection or anything. And, frankly, I resent you making rash judgments about me.” She took in a deep breath through her nose and let it out through her mouth, counting to four. “What happened between you and your birth mother that left you so angry and resentful?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Like hell, it doesn’t. You’re drawing conclusions about me, my decisions, and what I want before ever letting me tell you my reason why—all based on your own personal experience.”
“You just told me your reasons.”
“Not really.” This was getting deeper than she wanted.
“All right.” He smoothed his hair before picking up the chair. “Why don’t you tell me why you need to find her?”
“Okay. But not until you take a seat.”
He nodded.
“And I want you to tell me what happened with your birth mother.”
He arched a brow.
“You’re refusing services because of what happened to you. If I’m going to plead my case, and you still refuse, I feel you at least owe me the rationale behind it.”
“Fair enough.”
She poured another hefty glass of wine. “All I want is to know that I did the right thing. That she has a better life than I could have ever given her,” she said.
“And what if she didn’t have a good life?” he asked. “Have you thought about that?”
Shannon sucked in a quick breath. “Yes. As a matter of fact, I have. And if something bad happened, I will have to live with that.”
“Can you?”
“Jesus. Just give me the name of your friend. I’ll have them find her.”
He reached out and encircled his fingers around her wrist. “You gave her up for a reason. You own that reason. But once you made that decision, you gave up getting to own the outcome.”
“I understand that.” She slid her arm out from under his grip. “But I need to know.”
“Do you? Or do you, deep down, want to meet your daughter?”
“You have no idea what it’s like not knowing anything about a person you gave birth to. I need to know she exists. That those cries I heard when she was born were real.”
Jackson had moved his chair so it faced hers, and it made it very difficult not to look at him. “What does that mean?”
She blinked. “I don’t know how to make it any clearer. I need to know what happened to her.”
“I know I sound like a broken record, but what if what I find out isn’t good?”
Tears formed in her eyes. “Anything is better than not knowing she exists. Will you help me or not?”
“You don’t want any contact with her?”
Shannon shook her head. “I understand how disruptive that could be, even if my intentions are good. That’s why I don’t want to meet her. But to know she’s out there… Somewhere. It would ease my aching heart.”
He touched the side of her cheek. Gently, he took his
Comments (0)