Fake Love (For Now) by Penny Wylder (great novels .txt) 📗

perfect and sated. I stroke my hand over her hair, feeling the silk of it between my fingers.

Fucking hell.

A lightning bolt rips through my chest and I have a moment of clarity like I’ve never experienced before.

I want this engagement to stay real. I want to help her achieve all of her dreams of becoming a vet and then bring her home every night and fuck her until she screams my name. I want to make her laugh and smile so that all the shadows leave her eyes, and pull her with me on these little camping trips so that I can spread her out under the stars.

All this time I’ve been struggling with what I needed and where I wanted to be. I’ve felt lost, and I didn’t know what my soul needed, but now I know that it needs her.

Erin stirs on my chest, and as she moves, there’s an ache inside me. A sudden conviction that I don’t know how to voice. So when she looks up at me, sleep still clinging to her, I don’t say anything. I just roll over her and kiss her as hard as I dare.

The need to imprint myself on her is roaring inside me. I still have some time—I can convince her to stay. To be mine. Because there’s no part of me that believes that she doesn’t feel this too. With both Asher and Leo, I was skeptical. Now I’m a believer.

At the same time, I know that it’s not that simple. She has a life and I have one too. No matter the chemistry and connection, there are things that will make this hard.

I’m still going to try.

We whisper good morning, and she slips out of the tent for a moment. I catch sight of her washing in the river before she comes back and puts on her clothes. There’s so much that I want to say to her, but at the same time it feels perfect between us, and we share smiles instead of words.

Neither of us wants to break the bubble that’s surrounding us, so we don’t. The entire time we break down the camp, and then longer as we walk back to the property hand in hand. We take our time, the sun well up in the sky by the time we’re approaching the group of people spread out through the green space for an outdoor lunch.

“Thank you for taking me out there,” Erin says softly.

I grin down at her. “For taking you out there? Or for taking you out there.”

“Both,” she says with her own smirk.

Up ahead, I see Erin’s parents talking to Diana, who waves to me quickly. She’s a bubbly woman, always full of joy and snark. Erin will love her.

But as we get closer, my heart drops into my stomach. First, I see the confused look on Diana’s face. And then I hear her speak. “What? That’s crazy. Of course Hudson isn’t engaged. I’ve barely seen Hudson with a woman, let alone anyone he’d be serious enough to marry.”

She looks at me then, and her gaze drops to where my hand is linked to Erin’s, and she pauses. What the fuck happened? Asher didn’t tell her that this was going on? There has to be a mistake, because Diana would never do something to hurt anyone. Especially something like this.

But now Mr. and Mrs. O’Neill are looking at the two of us and our joined hands. Hands that are now locked together so tightly because we’re both squeezing like hell.

“Erin?” her mother asks. “What’s going on?”

Mr. O’Neill looks wary as he glances back and forth between the two of us.

Erin is pale, and she looks up at me. I try to tell her with my eyes that I’m here for her. That I’ll support whatever decision she makes. That I want her.

Fuck, why didn’t I tell her everything this morning? I can’t say it now. Not when everything is on the verge of cracking apart.

Slowly, Erin pulls her hand from mine, and I feel myself breaking. I can’t protect her right now, and that fucking kills me.

“It’s a lie,” she says quietly, looking at the ground. “It’s all a lie.”

“What’s a lie?” her father asks.

Erin clears her throat. “The fact that I was visiting Blue Mountain. I never was. I was working at an emergency vet clinic even though you didn’t want me to. I told you I was coming here so you wouldn’t think I was working too much. And being with Hudson is a lie, too. We slept together because I wanted just once to feel something other than anxiety and regret. He said what he said to save me the embarrassment, it’s all a fucking lie.”

Her words ring out across the property and everyone around us goes silent.

“I’m sorry that I lied,” she says, now looking directly at her parents and nowhere near me. Her voice is filled with emotion. “I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry that I ruined your anniversary with all this and that you don’t get to plan a real wedding. I’m sorry that I disappointed you, and I’m just…sorry. I’ve gotta go.”

She breaks into a jog toward the front of the property where the cars are, and I go to follow her, only to be held back by Asher. “Let her go.”

I glare at him. “Are you fucking serious? This is your fault. Take your hands off me.” My voice is a growl that’s deadly.

“Let her go,” Asher says again, calmly. Erin’s parents are already hurrying after her. But I need to be there. I can’t just let her leave.

“Diana and Rose ended up staying in the city last night, I didn’t have the chance to tell them. I’m sorry. But you need to let her go. Let her breathe and then try again.”

He’s right. I can’t just barge after her like this. I’m nothing to her. I’m not her fiancé, and I’m not her protector. I’m just a guy she fucked a few times.

I