A Thief in the Night - E. W. Hornung (phonics reader .TXT) 📗

a tall, ungainly man whom he addressed as Ernest, but whose surname I never learned. Ernest in turn introduced me, with a shy and clumsy courtesy, to the two remaining guests. They were the pair who had driven up in the hansom; one turned out to be Kingsmill, Q.C.; the other I knew at a glance from his photographs as Parrington, the backwoods novelist. They were admirable foils to each other, the barrister being plump and dapper, with a Napoleonic cast of countenance, and the author one of the shaggiest dogs I have ever seen in evening-clothes. Neither took much stock of me, but both had an eye on Raffles as I exchanged a few words with each in turn. Dinner, however, was immediately announced, and the six of us had soon taken our places round a brilliant little table stranded in a great dark room.

I had not been prepared for so small a party, and at first I felt relieved. If the worst came to the worst, I was fool enough to say in my heart, they were but two to one. But I was soon sighing for that safety which the adage associates with numbers. We were far too few for the confidential duologue with one’s neighbor in which I, at least, would have taken refuge from the perils of a general conversation. And the general conversation soon resolved itself into an attack, so subtly concerted and so artistically delivered that I could not conceive how Raffles should ever know it for an attack, and that against himself, or how to warn him of his peril. But to this day I am not convinced that I also was honored by the suspicions of the club; it may have been so, and they may have ignored me for the bigger game.

It was Lord Thornaby himself who fired the first shot, over the very sherry. He had Raffles on his right hand, and the backwoodsman of letters on his left. Raffles was hemmed in by the law on his right, while I sat between Parrington and Ernest, who took the foot of the table, and seemed a sort of feudatory cadet of the noble house. But it was the motley lot of us that my lord addressed, as he sat back blinking his baggy eyes.

“Mr. Raffles,” said he, “has been telling me about that poor fellow who suffered the extreme penalty last March. A great end, gentlemen, a great end! It is true that he had been unfortunate enough to strike a jugular vein, but his own end should take its place among the most glorious traditions of the gallows. You tell them Mr. Raffles: it will be as new to my friends as it is to me.”

“I tell the tale as I heard it last time I played at Trent Bridge; it was never in the papers, I believe,” said Raffles gravely. “You may remember the tremendous excitement over the Test Matches out in Australia at the time: it seems that the result of the crucial game was expected on the condemned man’s last day on earth, and he couldn’t rest until he knew it. We pulled it off, if you recollect, and he said it would make him swing happy.”

“Tell ’em what else he said!” cried Lord Thornaby, rubbing his podgy hands.

“The chaplain remonstrated with him on his excitement over a game at such a time, and the convict is said to have replied: ‘Why, it’s the first thing they’ll ask me at the other end of the drop!’ ”

The story was new even to me, but I had no time to appreciate its points. My concern was to watch its effect upon the other members of the party. Ernest, on my left, doubled up with laughter, and tittered and shook for several minutes. My other neighbor, more impressionable by temperament, winced first, and then worked himself into a state of enthusiasm which culminated in an assault upon his shirt-cuff with a joiner’s pencil. Kingsmill, Q.C., beaming tranquilly on Raffles, seemed the one least impressed, until he spoke.

“I am glad to hear that,” he remarked in a high bland voice. “I thought that man would die game.”

“Did you know anything about him, then?” inquired Lord Thornaby.

“I led for the Crown,” replied the barrister, with a twinkle. “You might almost say that I measured the poor man’s neck.”

The point must have been quite unpremeditated; it was not the less effective for that. Lord Thornaby looked askance at the callous silk. It was some moments before Ernest tittered and Parrington felt for his pencil; and in the interim I had made short work of my hock, though it was Johannisberger. As for Raffles, one had but to see his horror to feel how completely he was off his guard.

“In itself, I have heard, it was not a sympathetic case?” was the remark with which he broke the general silence.

“Not a bit.”

“That must have been a comfort to you,” said Raffles dryly.

“It would have been to me,” vowed our author, while the barrister merely smiled. “I should have been very sorry to have had a hand in hanging Peckham and Solomons the other day.”

“Why Peckham and Solomons?” inquired my lord.

“They never meant to kill that old lady.”

“But they strangled her in her bed with her own pillowcase!”

“I don’t care,” said the uncouth scribe. “They didn’t break in for that. They never thought of scragging her. The foolish old person would make a noise, and one of them tied too tight. I call it jolly bad luck on them.”

“On quiet, harmless, well-behaved thieves,” added Lord Thornaby, “in the unobtrusive exercise of their humble avocation.”

And, as he turned to Raffles with his puffy smile, I knew that we had reached that part of the programme which had undergone rehearsal: it had been perfectly timed to arrive with the champagne, and I was not afraid to signify my appreciation of that small mercy. But Raffles laughed so quickly at his lordship’s humor, and yet with