The Small House at Allington - Anthony Trollope (i want to read a book txt) 📗

her whom he was seeking, he became more and more conscious of the hopelessness of his errand. Him she had never loved, and why should he venture to hope that she would love him now? He would have turned back had he not been aware that his promise to others required that he should persevere. He had said that he would do this thing, and he would be as good as his word. But he hardly ventured to hope that he might be successful. In this frame of mind he slowly made his way up across the lawn.

“My dear, there is John Eames,” said Mrs. Dale, who had first seen him from the parlour window.

“Don’t go, mamma.”

“I don’t know; perhaps it will be better that I should.”

“No, mamma, no; what good can it do? It can do no good. I like him as well as I can like anyone. I love him dearly. But it can do no good. Let him come in here, and be very kind to him; but do not go away and leave us. Of course I knew he would come, and I shall be very glad to see him.”

Then Mrs. Dale went round to the other room, and admitted her visitor through the window of the drawing-room. “We are in terrible confusion, John, are we not?”

“And so you are really going to live in Guestwick?”

“Well, it looks like it, does it not? But, to tell you a secret⁠—only it must be a secret; you must not mention it at Guestwick Manor; even Bell does not know;⁠—we have half made up our minds to unpack all our things and stay where we are.”

Eames was so intent on his own purpose, and so fully occupied with the difficulty of the task before him, that he could hardly receive Mrs. Dale’s tidings with all the interest which they deserved. “Unpack them all again,” he said. “That will be very troublesome. Is Lily with you, Mrs. Dale?”

“Yes, she is in the parlour. Come and see her.” So he followed Mrs. Dale through the hall, and found himself in the presence of his love.

“How do you do, John?”

“How do you do, Lily?” We all know the way in which such meetings are commenced. Each longed to be tender and affectionate to the other⁠—each in a different way; but neither knew how to throw any tenderness into this first greeting.

“So you’re staying at the Manor House,” said Lily.

“Yes; I’m staying there. Your uncle and Bell came yesterday afternoon.”

“Have you heard about Bell?” said Mrs. Dale.

“Oh, yes; Mary told me. I’m so glad of it. I always liked Dr. Crofts very much. I have not congratulated her, because I didn’t know whether it was a secret. But Crofts was there last night, and if it is a secret he didn’t seem to be very careful about keeping it.”

“It is no secret,” said Mrs. Dale. “I don’t know that I am fond of such secrets.” But as she said this, she thought of Crosbie’s engagement, which had been told to everyone, and of its consequences.

“Is it to be soon?” he asked.

“Well, yes; we think so. Of course nothing is settled.”

“It was such fun,” said Lily. “James, who took, at any rate, a year or two to make his proposal, wanted to be married the next day afterwards.”

“No, Lily; not quite that.”

“Well, mamma, it was very nearly that. He thought it could all be done this week. It has made us so happy, John! I don’t know anybody I should so much like for a brother. I’m very glad you like him;⁠—very glad. I hope you’ll be friends always.” There was some little tenderness in this⁠—as John acknowledged to himself.

“I’m sure we shall⁠—if he likes it. That is, if I ever happen to see him. I’ll do anything for him I can if he ever comes up to London. Wouldn’t it be a good thing, Mrs. Dale, if he settled himself in London?”

“No, John; it would be a very bad thing. Why should he wish to rob me of my daughter?”

Mrs. Dale was speaking of her eldest daughter; but the very allusion to any such robbery covered John Eames’s face with a blush, made him hot up to the roots of his hair, and for the moment silenced him.

“You think he would have a better career in London?” said Lily, speaking under the influence of her superior presence of mind.

She had certainly shown defective judgment in desiring her mother not to leave them alone; and of this Mrs. Dale soon felt herself aware. The thing had to be done, and no little precautionary measure, such as this of Mrs. Dale’s enforced presence, would prevent it. Of this Mrs. Dale was well aware; and she felt, moreover, that John was entitled to an opportunity of pleading his own cause. It might be that such opportunity would avail him nothing, but not the less should he have it of right, seeing that he desired it. But yet Mrs. Dale did not dare to get up and leave the room. Lily had asked her not to do so, and at the present period of their lives all Lily’s requests were sacred. They continued for some time to talk of Crofts and his marriage; and when that subject was finished, they discussed their own probable⁠—or, as it seemed now, improbable⁠—removal to Guestwick. “It’s going too far, mamma,” said Lily, “to say that you think we shall not go. It was only last night that you suggested it. The truth is, John, that Hopkins came in and discoursed with the most wonderful eloquence. Nobody dared to oppose Hopkins. He made us almost cry; he was so pathetic.”

“He has just been talking to me, too,” said John, “as I came through the squire’s garden.”

“And what has he been saying to you?” said Mrs. Dale.

“Oh, I don’t know; not much.” John, however, remembered well, at this moment, all that the gardener had said to him. Did she know of that encounter between him and Crosbie? and if she did know of it, in what light did