Toe to Toe (On Pointe Book 1) by Penelope Freed (comprehension books txt) 📗

being distracted. By a boy or by anything else. I know you, if you give it 100% you’ll be happy with the weekend no matter what, but if you know you’re giving less than that, you will regret it.”

Ugh, I hate it when she’s right. And she’s right so many times, it’s not fair. I do want to do well this weekend. I don’t want to be a dancer, I don’t need to win anything this weekend to prove myself. But I want to do well because I’ve worked hard for this, even if some people think I haven’t, and I want to get on stage and perform because that’s the best part, All the hard work is only worth it when you get to go on stage and just dance your heart out.

“I’m sorry, you’re right. I’m focused, I promise.” And I am. I mean, I will be. I probably shouldn’t tell her that Tyler is planning to come watch the competition tomorrow night. I wonder if I should warn Hannah? Nah, I’m sure she’s over her little crush by now. It’s been almost a month, right? Besides, she probably won’t even see him, knowing her, she’ll spend all her time backstage worrying and won’t come out into the audience at all.

“I’m not trying to make you feel bad or guilty, I just want you to finish this weekend feeling good about yourself, not disappointed,” Ms. Parker wraps her arms around me for a quick hug. “Go. They’re too wound up to listen to me right now, but they’ll copy you.” she sighs. “Go be the good example they need, and give yourself a proper barre while you’re at it.”

I pull my phone out as I make my way to join the littles, smiling at Tyler’s texts.

Tyler: You still want me to come tomorrow, right? What time? I have practice until 2

Me: Yes please, I need someone here to cheer me on. Text me when you get here and if I can sneak out I will, but no promises. You can sit at the back inside the theater.

Tyler: Do I have to sit in the back? Am I in trouble?

I send him a gif of Judge Judy rolling her eyes.

Tyler: Got it. Sit in the back. Don’t bring a sign. Clap like it’s a golf tournament. Don’t make noise. Any other instructions, ma’am?

Me: Ha. Ha. Ha.

Should I say anything about avoiding Hannah? I think about it, but it will probably just make it worse if the big dope is trying to be stealthy.

Me: Nope, just can’t wait to see you after xoxo

Chapter 10 Hannah

Don’t cry.

Don’t cry.

Don’t cry.

My throat is tight, my jaw is locked, and my eyes are burning. Everything I did was wrong. I can hear Lisa and Katy talking to Mae as we pack up our bags, but I don’t listen. It’s background noise to the pounding of my heart and the voice in my head.

Don’t cry.

Don’t cry.

Don’t cry.

My eyes are burning, my head is pounding, and my breath is shaky. Why am I even here? I was the worst dancer in the room. Tears blur my vision as I pull my warm up pants on. I can’t blink, if I blink the tears will spill over. Too late.

Don’t sniff.

Don’t sniff.

Don’t sniff.

My cheeks are wet, my nose is running, and sweat is still dripping down my temples. I was so terrible Jean-Paul had to stop the class and correct me after almost every exercise. I pull a towel out of my bag and roughly rub it over my entire face, hiding the fact that I’m wiping my eyes, not just my sweat.

“Hannah?” Lisa’s voice breaks through my silent litany.

“Huh?”

“Are you okay?” she asks, concern written all over her face.

I look around and realize that we’re the last ones left in the studio. I shrug my shoulders, but don’t say anything because I know I’ll start crying if I do. I grab my bag and stand up to walk out the door. I hear Lisa following me but I’m lost in my own thoughts.

I can’t believe I danced so terribly.

Jean-Paul Phillipe was right when he said we were doing it all wrong.

Why did I think I could do this?

My legs were shaking and heavy before we even finished the barre.

He kept picking on me, pointing out all the things I was doing wrong.

I couldn’t even land a single pirouette.

No wonder Jean-Paul kept correcting me, I was doing everything wrong. That’s what he kept saying.

I messed up every exercise, I couldn’t get a single combination right.

“Are you even listening to me?” I stop walking when Katy and Lisa block my way. “That class was awful. I swear he was trying to make us dance badly on purpose,” Katy says, exasperated.

I silently shake my head. If I open my mouth to speak, all the thoughts in my head will come tumbling out. I don’t want to say what I’m thinking, I know if I do I’ll see on my friends’ faces that they agree. I couldn’t bear it.

I pull a shaky breath into my lungs, a little hiccup at the end of it. Concentrate on breathing Hannah.

I take a couple more shuddering breaths, trying to calm my mind and focus on nothing else. I know the girls are talking but I’m not listening. I wish my mom was here.

“Hey girls,” Ms. Parker calls to us as she walks up. “How was class?”

“Um…” Katy stalls. “Honestly? It was awful.”

“What do you mean?” Ms. Parker sounds concerned. I can feel her eyes on me and I shrug.

“Well, he made the exercises really tricky. Like, almost impossible.” Lisa explains. “And then every time we did an exercise, he told us we were doing everything wrong. He kept saying that our teachers taught us everything wrong.” I hear a choked sound, then I realize that I made it.

“He was picking on Hannah a lot,” Lisa adds. “He singled her out after almost every exercise to correct her. He was pretty mean about it.”

Ms.