Legacy: Letters from eminent parents to their daughters by Menon, Sudha (books suggested by bill gates txt) 📗

the elders in our house where parenting was a community responsibility and children learnt values from whichever elder happened to be around at various points in our lives.

I believe business education boxes people completely. I did not train the both of you in either accounts and balance sheets or profit and loss issues but I am glad I got you interested in humanities. While understanding the nuances of finance is very important, I knew you would learn these anyway while being involved in the business. If you had first learnt about finance or business in classrooms, I believe you wouldn’t have gathered the ability to learn the softer aspects of life, the importance of understanding human beings, society, social trends and culture—all of which are just as important in a consumer business like ours.

At a superficial level, you may find that the world values the people who can talk suavely about numbers and discuss balance sheets. But it is my belief and experience that in the long run, it is people who matter. It is how you understand and interpret people, how you deal with them and inspire them, and how you lead and challenge them that decide how successful and happy you are. The training you receive in a classroom can only help you to an extent. Life has been my best teacher.

Ashni, Avni, you have both grown up hearing me talk about the importance of human values. I believe that the source of everything in life is our thoughts, vichaar, soch. For me, there isn’t a separate set of values for business and another set of values for one’s personal life. All my values are intertwined and what I practice at home is the same as what happens between me and my team at work.

To me, the study of human behavior is the most important. Once you understand how and why human beings behave the way they do, it is easy to learn business. But it is not as easy as it sounds because to understand human beings and their mysterious ways, you have to understand there is no absoluteness where human beings are concerned. Every truth is contextual. You have to understand that life is not black or white and that there are lots in between the two ends of the spectrum. If we look around us, we will see there is a constant worldwide search for absolute truth but in reality, I think no such thing exists. Each of us process information in our individual way depending upon our background and upbringing and our truth depends on our unique set of circumstances. If we are able to accept these simple facts, life becomes less of a challenge and more of a journey of learning.

I know I have been an unconventional father and ours has been an unusual parent-child relationship, where I have been more at your beck and call, being ordered around by the both of you rather than being the authoritative parent who has sought to impose rules in your life!

Ashni, I still remember you came to me once when you were still a teenager and surprised me to no ends when you questioned me, asking why I was so different from the other fathers that you knew and why I did not keep tabs on what you both did with your time, your pocket money, and your whereabouts when you were out with your friends! It has been a different childhood for you and I am glad it has been that way because the both of you have managed to carve out the map of your lives the way you want to live it.

What makes me happy is that our constant discussions on life, the Indian mindset, the lessons we can learn from our mythology, seem to have all come together to make you both very unique people with very clear ideas of your own.

Avni, I am filled with joy that you have grown up to be a person who is so widely-travelled and so welcoming of the amazingly diverse people that you have accepted as your friends from all over the world, during your studies abroad. Today, I am always so proud to notice the energy and sense of dynamism that you bring to your work. I am sure these will stick to you as you grow and reach new milestones in your life and work.

Ashni, you are a deep thinker and over the years, your in-depth research and what I must admit is a very unique study of Indian communities, their festivals, customs, rituals, and beliefs, has added immense value to our business. The customer insights that you have gathered and the way you have led the innovation and incubation team in the business gives me the confidence that you will always have a superior edge in any business that you pursue. In fact, sometimes the way you deal with situations and the way you ideate at work make me feel you understand life, our business better than I do.

But I also believe that this is the beginning of a long journey. I believe that as you grow, achieve more, and take on more responsibilities, you will have to be even more sensitive to the feelings of the people around you. My personal philosophy has been to never worry about what people think of me and also to never build expectations from anyone. In expecting something from someone, you are not only setting yourself up for disappointment but also burdening someone with the weight of your own need.

Though I have always encouraged both of you to think differently and celebrate your difference, I sometimes wonder if that has brought with it its own set of challenges. Even though you may think differently, you should always be open and welcoming to people who may not match up to your expectations. No one should isolate themselves from people, even if they may not match up to you intellectually. It is never a waste of