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you when itā€™s my time,ā€ Martin said, then Ro was flying, soaring, and Conner was right behind him, knowing Ro couldnā€™t flee his pain. Life and death didnā€™t work that way. He caught up to Ro in the alley of Virginiaā€™s CafĆ©. As much as Conner hated the place, he wouldnā€™t leave Ro there to stew.

ā€œItā€™s done, itā€™s the past, you canā€™t change it,ā€ he said as Ro glared at the spot where Conner had seen him with JD.

ā€œI donā€™t get why Dad is so angry about it. Why heā€™s so ashamed!ā€ Ro threw a punch at the wall, cursing when his fist went through it effortlessly. ā€œHeā€™s going to hate me now because I had sex with a guy here? Is that really so evil? Or is it because it was a guy? I never thought Dad didnā€™t accept me, but maybe that was just because he hadnā€™t had to think of me with another man.ā€

Conner didnā€™t think it was any of those things, or at least, it wasnā€™t for the most part. ā€œThere are things we donā€™t know about ourselves until something happens, some climactic event or tragedy that forces us to say or do things we wouldnā€™t normally say or do.ā€ He moved over to Ro and stroked his hip as he spoke. ā€œMaybe your dad was shocked, and angry, and hurt. He didnā€™t see you as a sexual being, because heā€™s your dad and also he never had a need to. You didnā€™t bring guys around or even mention any. So he didnā€™t know, and then it was right there, in his face, in the form of a drunken obnoxious fool.ā€ And that was Conner being nice in his description of JD. ā€œHeā€™d just lost you, and JD blabbed then your dad felt guilty, really guilty. He didnā€™t want your name smeared in town, and maybe part of it was he didnā€™t want it to get out for his sake, too. But reallyā€”ā€ Conner positioned himself in front of Ro, looking into his eyes. ā€œReally I think he did it because he wanted everyone to remember the good things about you, and even though what you did with JD didnā€™t negate those things, you know how people are. They love a scandal, and gossip. Theyā€™d have made it sordidā€”ā€

ā€œMore sordid,ā€ Ro corrected. ā€œI was lonely. Mom disappeared, and youā€”ā€ Ro hissed and bit his lip.

Well, that was a new guilt Conner would have to live with. Heā€™d do it, too, because if he had contributed to Roā€™s need to meet JD in that alley, heā€™d have to find a way to make peace with that. ā€œItā€™s okay. I did avoid you. I wanted you and thought you pitied me, and it hurt like a mother when I saw you here with JD. I saw you before, too, with some other guy. I couldnā€™t take it. I shouldnā€™t have been such a coward.ā€

Chapter Thirteen

Ro picked up right away on what Conner wasnā€™t sayingā€”now Conner would feel responsible for Roā€™s death. Heā€™d believe that by avoiding Ro, heā€™d pushed him toward JD, and that in turn had led to Ro crashing.

Ro wasnā€™t having it. He was tempted to grab Conner by his ears and rattle some sense into him, but he wouldnā€™t. Unless it was necessary.

ā€œLook.ā€ Ro placed his hands on Connerā€™s shoulders and glared at him. ā€œThis is bullshit, you thinking you are in any way responsible for what happened to me. I wasā€”am, ratherā€”an adult. I would have put out for JD whether you popped in and said ā€˜hiā€™ or not, Conner. Why? Because Iā€™m a guy, and I get horny, and all I wanted was sex, not love. Not from him, or any other guy, because I was already in love with you.ā€

Conner opened his mouth to speak and Ro shook his head. ā€œLet me finish. I know I said I couldnā€™t say that, but itā€™s true. Maybe it started out as a crush, but I heard so many stories about you, and saw how youā€™d interact with Sev and Laine over the years. I grew to love that man who could make them laugh and make Laine snarly and happy at the same time. I loved the way you didnā€™t abandon them even when it seemed they only thought of you as a prankster rather than the spirit who helped them and saved them at times. I knew you before I died, Conner, and I know you now. I love you, and no one on Earth would have made me happy, because they wouldnā€™t have been you.ā€

ā€œButā€”ā€ Conner began and Ro decided to shut him up and make him forget whatever it was heā€™d been about to say. Ro climbed up Connerā€™s body and got his legs around Connerā€™s waist at the same time that he kissed him.

It wasnā€™t a gentle kiss by any means, Ro clutching at Connerā€™s muscular back, digging his heels into Connerā€™s thighs while he nipped and bit and moaned. Connerā€™s moan flowed into Ro, filling him with even more need. He didnā€™t wait for Conner to will their clothes away. Ro did it himself, craving the touch and feel of his lover against him.

Conner hefted him up high, a move that wouldnā€™t have been possible had they been living bodies, Ro didnā€™t think. Conner braced him by the backs of his thighs and he sucked the tip of Roā€™s cock as Ro hung onto his head. Conner pulled him forward, taking more of Roā€™s length. Ro gasped and thrust, his eyes closing. The world shifted and he was on his back, Conner sucking his shaft down to the root.

Ro bucked and yelled, and Conner swallowed, his throat muscles contracting around Roā€™s cock with such erotic perfection that he couldnā€™t hold back. He arched and keened as Conner pushed one thick thumb into his ass, then cum jetted from his cock. Conner drank it down. He suckled until Ro was too sensitive for another lick. Roā€™s dick slipped

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