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anything, Reve. Least of all a car.”

“Then it will still make me feel better knowing that you and Joey are protected.”

“All right,” she says. “But you have to earn the money and not just poof it, okay? I don’t want anything unethical, and I need a regular car on human roads.”

I nod. “I’ll do it the old-fashioned way. A way of showing you I’m trying to fit in your world.”

She sighs happily. “After today, I can really see a future for us here.”

I frown slightly, not wanting this to turn into an argument. I still can’t believe anyone would want to willingly stay in this dangerous world. “I’m glad you can see a future,” I say carefully.

“I do,” she says. “It’s a little scary because I never expected this to happen. I expected to stay alone. I expected to just go about life as usual. But everything turned upside down. And the worst part is I like it.” She smiles at me.

“Why is that the worst part?”

“Because I still don’t think I deserve it, any of it, after what I exposed Joey to,” she says.

My heart pounds painfully at what she’s been through. “What Mark exposed Joey to.”

She nods.

“Hey, tell me about Sally,” I say, leaning back on the sand, hoping to relax and distract her. Her ex is a horror, but he’s in the past. I’m her future. “Why do you love that car so much when it’s so broken down?”

“I guess she’s a little like me,” she says. “She’s been through a lot, and she just keeps chugging.” She sucks in a breath, looking nervous. “Plus, she’s the reason I was able to leave Mark in the first place. I was so young and poor. I had Joey at eighteen, so you do the math. Mark found me when I was working full time at a grocery store after both of my parents died.”

I nod. “You had it rough.”

“So of course I believed Mark and his promises. And by the time I realized it was all lies and he’d manipulated a young and impressionable girl, it was too late. I was already pregnant.”

I just keep listening.

“I never thought about not having Joey. I felt deep in my heart that I wanted him, and I would take care of him at all costs. But Mark didn’t want him. He saw him as a bother, someone to take away my attention. That’s when he went from yelling to being actually verbally abusive. When Joey was old enough to understand what was going on, I was ready to leave, but I had no idea how to.”

“I see.”

“I had no family. No friends then. But one of the customers at the grocery store mentioned he was trying to get rid of his ex-wife’s old car, and when I asked the price, he said free if I could get it off his property in two hours. So I did.”

“I see.”

“I packed up that night, took off to a motel, and was free from there.” She brushes back a red lock, her beautiful hair windblown from sea breeze. “The rest is history.”

“I’m grateful to Sally, then,” I say. “And to you for being so enterprising. That was brave of you.”

“It was, wasn’t it?” Jen grins at me. “I did okay. And Joey’s okay. And I’m here with you.” She smiles as she lies flat on her back, gazing at the sky again. “I guess everything worked out just fine.”

I stare at her, still sad that I can’t take the pain away. That I wasn’t here to protect her when she needed me so long ago.

But this isn’t about me.

“Tell me what you want now,” I say, rolling over to prop myself over her with one hand. “We can talk more about the past or the future. Or eat our picnic or—”

She wraps her hands around my neck, beaming up at me. Then she pulls me down for a kiss as sea breeze blows around us, cooling our skin.

She pulls back and smiles up at me, looking radiant, so beautiful I can barely breathe. “Anything with you is heaven,” she says. “It has been since you arrived.”

Then I kiss her because I don’t know what else to say.

All I know is that I love her, and I’m going to show her in every moment I can.

15

Jen

Kissing Reve like this, on a cloudy day by a turbulent ocean, with cool sand beneath my back is the most real things have felt for us.

It’s the opposite of the lush, vibrant dreamscapes Reve creates for us in my dreams.

It’s real, and as Reve deepens the kiss and heat rises in me, my hands fall from around his neck to grab the blanket beneath us, brushing the malleable sand.

It’s not the most comfortable position. No silk or down mattresses or regal setting. We aren’t on clouds.

But just here with the real sky above us, on a date, kissing, laughing… it’s like the youth I wish I’d had.

I feel like a teenager here with him, and it makes me feel slightly guilty because I gave up a normal youth when I decided to be a mom.

But right now, I’m just Jennifer, being kissed by a gorgeous guy with ash-blond hair, a body to die for, and eyes the color of a sea on high exposure.

He pulls back, propping himself above me, and smiles, and the ocean behind him, the silver and yellow and blue sunset, frames his gorgeous face and powerful shoulders.

I just look up at him, amazed.

He’s been amazing me since he came into my life. He cares about me and Joey. He’ll do anything I ask.

Yes, he can get impatient and push things faster than I want. Like meeting Joey or finding out more about my life. Or wanting to fix my car.

But I find myself actually trusting someone for once when it’s been a long time since I allowed myself to rely on anyone but me.

It feels good but scary.

I just hope he doesn’t let me

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