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your notebook and pen?”

That caused him to halt his movements. “Why?” he asked slowly.

“I need a piece of paper and a pen to write a note, and I knew you’d have some.”

Moving out of the kitchen, Dean went into a little storage area and came out with a legal notepad and a pen. “Here,” he thrust them at me. “Now leave me be. You know I can’t concentrate on anything else until my space is clean.”

I did know that. Dean would freak out if I left even a sock on the floor in our room. I would make sure to never room with him again after I found everything of mine rearranged because Dean stated it was all wrong. Why he was looking in the drawer under my bed, I’ll never know, but I didn’t like people going through my things. Not that anyone did, but we had so little we could bring with us, and he’d gone through all of it. Dean didn’t have OCD or anything like that, so I was betting he was trying to find out more information about me and had gone through all my belongings and then didn’t know the order I had them. I was a tidy motherfucker after being in the military, so I knew my shit wasn’t messy.

“I’ll be downstairs in the crew kitchen until I have to go pick them up.” I wasn’t sure why I told him where I’d be, except in the hope he’d leave me alone to write my note. A note where I had no idea what to say. Who was to say Stella would believe me after she read it?

I stared at the paper in front of me, trying to come up with what to say and knowing that my time was limited. I wasn’t trying to be a poet or write a sweet love note. Putting the pen to paper, I started to say my truth.

Stella,

I know you don’t want to hear from me, but please don’t throw this away until you’ve read it through.

While I don’t know everything Ophelia told you about her and me, what I do know is we’ve never been in a relationship. Not for one single day. I was having a bad day, got drunk, and wasn’t thinking straight when I slept with her. It was only that one time. I promise you. Has she offered it again? Yes, many times, and I always turn her down. Nothing could make me have sex with her again.

I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to leave and think I’m a cheater or a liar. I’m neither, and I couldn’t bear to think of you leaving here having that impression of me.

Our night together was special. You’re the first and only guest I plan to ever have sex with. I only wish we’d had more time, but maybe that’s for the better. I already can’t imagine not seeing your beautiful face on this boat every day, and I know it would only be harder the closer we got.

I wish you all the best once you get back to California and start your new life. You’re a wonderful person who deserves the best. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.

All the best,

Remy St. James

Folding up the note, I went back up to the kitchen to find Dean leaning back against the counter, gulping down a bottle of water. He set it down when he saw me come in.

“Did you get your letter written?”

“I did. Do you by any chance know if we have any envelopes I could put it in?”

His face scrunched up while he tapped the bottom to his chin. “I can’t remember seeing one, but I wasn’t really looking. Are you mailing something?”

“Something,” I answered back.

He had a triumphant look on his face as he replied. “If you can’t answer me, then I can’t help you.”

“Fine.” I rested my hands on the counter and leaned forward. “You’re so damn annoying. I wrote Stella a letter, and I want to make sure no one else reads it before her.”

Cocking his head to the side, Dean asked with a smirk, “Has O been on the warpath?”

“You know damn well she has. She’s been telling Stella lies. I don’t want her leaving here thinking I was a mistake.”

“See what happens when you can’t keep your dick in your pants? Nothing but trouble.”

“Tell me something I don’t know. From now on, he’ll stay nicely put away for no one to see.”

“You say that now until the next pretty lady comes along and bats her eyelashes at you.” He laughed, slapping the countertop when he saw the murderous look in my eyes. “I’m joking, mate. You need to lighten up a little.”

“My dick is no laughing matter,” I said with a straight face, only to crack a smile.

“No, it’s not. You know, if you ever get tired of the ladies, I’m waiting for you.”

“As nice of an offer as that is, I don’t think it’s going to happen. Sorry, dude.”

“You can’t say I never offered.”

That was true. At least once a charter, Dean offered. At first, I thought he was joking, but I quickly learned he was serious. I think the entire crew was shocked to learn he was gay one night when he got drunk and told us all about his ex-boyfriend who stole his credit card and maxed it out while he was away one season.

Dean was rugged with muscles that were always popping out of his shirt and the kindest smile you ever saw. Not one thing about him said he was into men until he opened his mouth and started to talk about dick.

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about if you put it in her room. All the guests will probably go to their rooms when they get back, and if not, they will before turndown service. If you’re afraid O’s going to find it, put the letter in her bag or something.”

I could very well see O

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