TONY: Slow Burn (Raging Fire Book 1) - Kallypso Masters (types of ebook readers txt) 📗

allowed to continue searching. We weren’t sure if there would be one bedroom or two, but were hopeful we’d find the kids alive.” He paused, swallowing hard. “By the time we found them huddled together in a closet…” His voice broke.

Rafe resumed the story. “We got them out of the house and to the paramedics as quickly as we could, but it was too late.” Rafe continued, his voice weaker. “My anxiety level skyrocketed after that—both on and off duty. Finding those kids was the hardest thing I’ve ever experienced.”

“The medical examiner later said the boys died of smoke inhalation,” Lieutenant said, “and probably were gone before we even showed up. We wouldn’t have been able to save any of them, even if we’d arrived fifteen minutes earlier.”

“There were no working smoke detectors in the house,” Rafe added.

No wonder Rafe was always the first at the station to volunteer to speak in schools and civic groups every fall about the importance of changing batteries in smoke detectors at the same time they reset their clocks when Daylight Savings Time ended. At the same time, he encouraged members of church and civic groups to have their chimneys cleaned annually.

“Even though I didn’t hear a single scream that night, I heard them in my nightmares for months after. Not only that, but every time a kid screamed—especially while playing—it took me back to that house and those two innocent boys we couldn’t get to in time.” His eyes grew bright with unshed tears and his chin shook as he fought to regain his composure.

Mama stood up and went around the table to give Rafe a hug. “You did all you could, Raphael. I’m so sorry you had to experience that.” With a glance to the lieutenant, she added, “You, too, Lieutenant Anderson.”

Rafe hugged Mama back before she let go and returned to her seat. He met Tony’s gaze again steadfastly and cleared his throat. “Tony, I know how hard it’s been for you hearing those screams for help from that mother and toddler over and over again, because I’m hearing them, too.”

Of course he would. Rafe had been on that ladder right behind Tony. He was beginning to see the extent of how this bad call had affected everyone involved.

“But I’m here to tell you that if I hadn’t gone to see Lisa Doyle all those years ago, I wouldn’t be doing this job today. I might not even be here.”

Was he saying he’d been suicidal? Or only that he’d have left Aspen Corners? Shit. Either way, how had Rafe kept up his stoic front all these years without letting on? Had Mama known about all this? She had to at least know he’d struggled after something like that, because he’d lived at home at the time. Maybe Matt and Franco knew about it as well, since they were in the fire service by then. Only Tony had been oblivious to his brother’s pain back then, focused more on his winter break from college and hooking up with old girlfriends than what his brother was going through.

“It was a rough time for the entire station,” Mama said, “but especially hard for your crew.” Rafe and Lieutenant nodded. Of course, she’d have been aware. Not much got past Mama. “I still remember your father’s first disastrous SAR mission,” Mama said. She looked at Rafe, but Tony had the feeling her words were mostly for his own ears.

“A mother and her young children were stranded on a remote road, stuck in snow and mud. Papa’s team was the first to reach them. Unfortunately, the mother and her youngest had already passed away before they could be helped. She’d given all the food and water in the car to her two children and had ventured out on foot to try to reach a house, but succumbed to the elements before she could return to them.”

Mama took a deep breath before continuing. “The older daughter survived. She was only four and was in severe hypothermia by the time Papa pulled her from the vehicle.” Mama’s voice cracked, and Tony squeezed her hand, not certain he wanted her to continue but needing to know this story he’d never heard before. “Your papa and another SAR worker wrapped her up in their coats. She was pressed against Papa’s chest as they hiked back out, hoping to infuse warmth back into her tiny body.

Mama cleared her throat. “The girl’s estranged father couldn’t be located immediately, and Papa stayed by her side at the hospital for days, simply holding her hand and talking to her so she wouldn’t feel alone. She was about Angelina’s age at the time, and I think he put himself in the place of those parents and his own daughter.”

Mama’s voice trailed off again, but she wiped away a few tears before going on. “When that little girl died, she took a part of your papa with her. SAR and first responders didn’t go to therapy much in those days; it wasn’t done much back then. But that little girl haunted him the rest of his life, especially around the anniversary of her death.”

“Anniversaries make it feel like it just happened yesterday,” Rafe warned. Ryder and Lieutenant Anderson nodded in agreement.

Tony would forever be haunted by the little girl and her mother from that river? He turned to Rafe. “Do you still have nightmares about that family?”

“Yeah, but not nearly as often. Like Papa, anniversaries are the worst for me too. But Lisa taught me some ways of dealing with it and preparing for those dates so they wouldn’t be as hard.”

“That’s why we’re hoping you’ll talk to her or someone, Tony,” Mama said. “I don’t want you to suffer the way Papa and Rafe did.”

“I’m doing okay, Mama.”

She narrowed her eyes and her scrutiny burned through his conscience until he could no longer meet her in the eye.

“We’re here today because we care about you, Tony,” Lieutenant Anderson said. “Every last one of us has