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even give you one of these.ā€

Ren grabs a beginner BDSM kit, clutching it to his chest.

ā€œOn that noteā€¦ā€ I say, taking a deep breath. ā€œI gotta go. Thank you for all of your help, Ren. Take good care of everythingā€”like I know you will. Iā€™ll call in as much as I can. Iā€™m sure Blake will let me use his cellphone.ā€

I walk to the front door and reach for the handle. An odd sensation rushes over meā€”like for some reason, this hunt for the pedophile ringā€”the way everything is playing out means more than I can completely fathom right now. When I get those types of feelings, I know to stop and take a beat because theyā€™re significant. It might not make sense now, but I have no doubt it will.

Turning back around, I pause and take everything in. The way the small shop is laid outā€”the lighting, the bookshelves, the herbs, crystals, and Renaldoā€™s Valentineā€™s Day merchandise. Renā€™s eyebrows tug in, but he doesnā€™t say anythingā€”he just watches me as I tune in.

The pungent smell of frankincense permeates the airā€”mixing with lavender and sage. Iā€™ve become so accustomed to those smells, I hardly even notice them anymore. But now, it all seems significant somehow.

ā€œEverything ā€¦ okay?ā€ Ren finally says, breaking the silence.

ā€œYeah, I justā€”I donā€™t know. Something made me pause,ā€ I say, shaking my head.

ā€œWhat was it?ā€

ā€œNot sure. Just a feeling, I guess. This trip is going to be significant. Perhaps life changing, I just donā€™t know how yet.ā€

ā€œMaybe you and Private Eye Tightpants will end up in one hotel room,ā€ Ren says, smiling sheepishly.

I chuckle. ā€œDonā€™t count on it. Butā€”whatever it is, I wanted to take a mental inventory of things. So I know whatā€™s changed when I come back. It may be nothing ā€¦ or it could be everything. Who knows?ā€

ā€œYou better take care of yourself, Diana. Be safe, for the love of all thatā€™s holy. Donā€™t put yourself in any unnecessary danger or anything. Yes, I know youā€”Ms. Run and Jump Before She Looks.ā€

Renaldo rarely goes all paternal on me, but when he does, itā€™s because Iā€™ve spooked him.

I walk over to him, putting my arms around him.

ā€œIā€™ll be safe. You better be, too. You hear me? Donā€™t piss off Mrs. Kaminski. Or Brody, for that matter.ā€

ā€œI hear you. And Iā€™ll try not to.ā€

ā€œGood.ā€

With that, I pat him on the back and turn on my heel. I donā€™t stop as I fling the door open and I donā€™t turn around as I walk out onto the sidewalk and down the street. Instead, I make my way deliberately forward, knowing full well when I return, things will be very different.

When Iā€™m back at my house, the strange sensations of significance hasnā€™t subsided. If anything, itā€™s gotten more powerful. Shivering away the energy, I instinctively flit my eyes to my calendarā€”one day to the full moon. Perhaps thatā€™s all it is?

Glancing at the clock as I set down my purse and keys, I take a deep breath. Itā€™s only gone 5:30pm.

I need to call Demetri.

Thereā€™s still plenty of time to pack and if for some reason anything goes wrongā€”I need to say my apology out loud.

Walking to the corded phone on my wall, I pluck it from its holder and dial his number.

ā€œHello?ā€ the womanā€™s voice on the other end answers.

For a moment, my heart skips a beatā€”then plummets into my stomach. Demetri and I never were a thingā€”not like thatā€”but heā€™s always had a special place in my heart. Heā€™s helped me through so many rough patches over the years. If he has a new woman in his life and he didnā€™t tell meā€”things are worse than I thought.

ā€œUhā€”hi,ā€ I say, recovering. ā€œIs Demetri there?ā€

ā€œSure,ā€ the womanā€™s upbeat voice responds. ā€œCan I tell him whoā€™s calling?ā€

ā€œItā€™s Diana,ā€ I say.

ā€œOh,ā€ is the response. Not the upbeat, ā€œgotchaā€ kind of ā€œoh,ā€ either. Itā€™s the ā€œholy shit, itā€™s herā€ kinda oh.

I wince.

After a bit of scuffling and voices muttering under a muffled receiver, the call clears up.

ā€œHi, Diana. What did you need?ā€ Demetriā€™s rough voice answers from the other end.

ā€œHey, Demetri. You doing okay?ā€

Silence greets me on the other end and I wince again.

ā€œLookā€”I know things didnā€™t go so well last monthā€”ā€

ā€œThatā€™s an understatement,ā€ he says.

I take a deep breath and bite my lip.

ā€œI know,ā€ I whisper, clutching the phone.

An awkward pause descends, as I search for the words I really want to say to him.

ā€œOkayā€”I know I suck. I never should have pushed you to try the ritual with me. I figured since we were already working with the Violet Flame for Morgan and Gabeā€”well, I thought it would help me, too. It was stupid and reckless.ā€

ā€œYeah, and it just about killed me, Diana. Stupid and reckless donā€™t even cover it.ā€

My fingertips graze my forehead as I nod gingerly. Heā€™s rightā€”God, heā€™s so right.

ā€œI donā€™t know what came over me. Itā€™s just been so long since I felt like doors might open. It was a long shot, I get that, butā€¦ā€ I take a deep breath, ā€œI canā€™t keep living like this and you were the only one who I trusted. Youā€™re the only one who understands my predicament.ā€

Demetri blows out a buff of air.

ā€œI get your desperation. I really do. And I know it wasnā€™t your fault. Itā€™s my fault, too. Iā€™m the one who brought up the Violet Flame in the first place. I mean, how the hell were you meant to know how powerful the magic is surrounding Morganā€™s requestā€”let alone your memory?ā€

ā€œWell, I should have guessed. Morgan has powerā€”more power than Iā€™ve felt roll off a single person in years. And with me ā€¦ I meanā€”itā€™s been a helluva long time and Iā€™ve never even gotten a glimpse of insight. Not even an inkling as to my life before I woke up that day. Iā€™ve tried everything. Literallyā€”everything I can think of. But I thoughtā€¦ I dunno, for whatever reason I thought that night was different. That the ritual we were doing together would be

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