Embracing Today, a firefighter romance: (The Trading Yesterday Series, #3) - Kahlen Aymes (old books to read .TXT) 📗

the unspeakable suffering that he must have gone through, but if his relatives’ actions and Marin’s bruises were anything to judge the situation by, then maybe he’d gotten what he deserved.

One thing I did know, I wanted answers. These feelings eating away at my insides needed to know. I felt frustrated as fuck trying to be sensitive to her situation, when I didn’t understand why a woman, any woman, stayed with an abusive man.

Marin hadn’t admitted he was abusive, but I knew it as sure as I knew my own name. Why didn’t she want to talk about it or share her experiences? What if she was one of those battered women who still thought she was in love with the bastard doing the beating? Anger flared and my jaw tightened. Missy was like that at first, always making excuses for Derrick, until Dylan became the subject of some of the abuse. Then she woke up.

I sucked in a heavy breath and let it out, my fingers tightening on the steering wheel of the old Chevy truck as it lumbered down the dirt road, bouncing obnoxiously with every bump I had the misfortune to hit in the dark.

When she pulled into the driveway and stopped the truck in front of the house, I rolled to a stop behind her. The single light on top of a high pole that stood between the farmhouse and the barn cast a soft yellow glow across the yard, while the full moon shone in the inky black sky; the stars brilliance muted by the illumination of both.

I was already out of my truck when she opened the door to hers and slid the short distance from the seat until her feet touched the ground. I put my hand on the open door ready to close it for her and looked down into her eyes. They sparkled in the moonlight as she looked up at me, but she didn’t move. It was if the warm night air wrapped us up together and desire stirred as my eyes roamed over her face, then dropped to her luscious, moist mouth. It would be luscious… it could be nothing less. I wanted to find out more than anything… ever.

Marin’s skin, illuminated by the low light, glowed. I could see she was tired, but to me at least, she looked vulnerable and so incredibly beautiful. Her loose bun of blonde hair was messy from all day in the car and soft tendrils moved in the slight breeze. Instinctively, my hand raised to brush her hair back, but I realized what I was doing before my fingers touched her jaw, and I dropped my arm to my side.

“Marin, I…” I began.

“Thank you, Ben.” She reached out and lightly touched the front of my shirt. Her fingers burned me through the thin material caused the muscles there to contract. Her eyes expression soft and unknowingly alluring. I felt the ache that I’d been fighting all day begin anew and with increased fervor.

“Will you be okay?” I stood two feet from her, longing to lean in and kiss her sweet mouth. I could almost taste it and my body responded involuntarily, though I willed it to stop. I wanted to reach out and brush her hair back again, my fingers tingled with it. “I can stay,” I suggested softly, caught up in the moment, my gaze locked with hers.

“What?” she asked, stiffening a bit.

When I realized how she’d interpreted my words, I rushed to explain and took two steps back. “I didn’t mean like that. I’m worried about those goons showing up, and I’d just rather not leave you alone in the middle of the night.” It was true, but I knew I’d let the attraction I felt for her get the better of me and she could see it. I had to get it under control. At least for now.

“Oh,” she said, flustered. “I see. Um, sorry I didn’t mean to suggest—”

“Don’t worry about it. We’ve both had a long day, and we’re both exhausted. I’ll just look in on the horses and then I’ll get out of here.”

I was embarrassed at my own weakness and that Marin had immediately jumped to the conclusion that I was suggesting we have sex. It wasn’t as if I wasn’t aroused by her nearness, and her fragility screamed at the protector inside me, but if we ever made love it wouldn’t be because she was grateful or feeling needy. Something inside me suffered that she might think so little of me.

“No, Ben…” she called after me as I turned and headed in the direction of the barn. “I’m sorry!”

I turned back but didn’t close the distance; just stood drinking in the site of her. “I don’t know what happened to you, and maybe one day you’ll be able to tell me, but you can trust me. I’m not that guy. You don’t have to be afraid of me. I promise. I’d never take advantage of a vulnerable woman.”

“I know that,” she said softly, regretfully. “I’m just… cautious. I’m not used to someone being so unselfish and kind and wanting nothing in return. The last time I trusted someone it didn’t turn out well.”

A plethora of emotions ran through me. A flash of anger surged at the thought of anyone expecting sex from her… for any reason, and I was ashamed that I desired her myself. It should be the last thing on my mind considering her situation. It was difficult not to want her, but I’d be damned if I’d make her think less of me by acting on it.

“I was trying to be a good friend… and I feel protective of you. If something happened to you, I’d never forgive myself. I won’t lie, Marin… I feel a strong attraction between us, but I know you’re not ready for another man in your life. I was only offering to stay on the sofa; to be here in case you needed me.”

“Okay,” she answered.