Debt-Free Forever by Gail Vaz-Oxlade (best english books to read for beginners txt) 📗

found that when people are sad, they spend more money—way more money. The researchers concluded that when people are sad, this sadness could trigger extravagant tendencies. Nicknamed the “misery is not miserly” phenomenon, it’s clear that having access to credit when you’re bummed out can end up costing you big-time.

Maybe the most disturbing part of the study was the fact that the sad people—who were made sad by watching a sad movie—spent more than four times what the not-sad people spent and had not a clue that it was their sadness that prompted them to splurge. They were completely unaware of how their own emotions were feeding into their consumerism. We’re bummed out and dumb about it, so we go Cheer Me Up Shopping.

So what’s a body to do? It would seem that if you’re feeling sad you should stay out of the stores, leave your credit cards in your freezer, and carry the minimum amount of cash. Or you could do something nice for someone else, and that’ll make you feel better and won’t cost a cent. Offer to cook a meal for a harried neighbour. Water someone’s garden. Put a dollar in someone’s meter. Little things that take your focus off you and your misery and move your focus outward will help you overcome the desire to go Cheer Me Up Shopping.

An investment in getting happy might just pay dividends on the financial front. Happiness isn’t always about getting what we want. It’s about wanting what we have. So instead of making lists of all the things we want or wish we had—even silent lists in our heads—today make a list of all the things you have that you want. This would be your inventory of how full and rich your life is. Then you can focus on what you have instead of what’s missing. Then the next time you see a tear-jerker movie, break up with a friend, bang up the car, yell at your kids, fail to get the promotion—whatever it is that’s triggering your sadness—you can look at the blessings in your life and say, “Thank you.”

What are you going to do the next time you feel sad and are battling the urge to splurge? Make a plan now since one won’t come easily once you’re in the dumper. And if you don’t have a plan, you’re only going to be sadder when the credit card bill arrives!

Strategy 10: Avoid Buyer’s Remorse

Have you ever bought something you just couldn’t live without and afterwards found yourself scratching your head and wondering what the hell you were thinking? Then you’ve experienced something called Buyer’s Remorse.

The fallout of shopping with the Impulse Gremlin on your back, Buyer’s Remorse makes you feel really crappy. You feel guilty about the money you’ve spent. You wonder whether you got a good deal. You question whether you bought the right product.

Whether you leave the restaurant wishing you’d ordered the fish instead of the steak, or cringe because you ended up spending 40% more than you’d planned on the new surround-sound system, Buyer’s Remorse turns shopping into an excruciatingly painful experience. And Buyer’s Remorse is far more widespread than most people think, mostly because we tend to suffer silently. Do you know that some researchers estimate that most people end up regretting up to 80% of their discretionary spending within a year of having spent the money? Wow! That’s a lot of “I wish I could take it back,” isn’t it?

Buyer’s Remorse often climbs on our backs when we find out we’ve paid too much for something, so making sure we know how much the item we’re buying is really worth can go a long way to removing the remorse. So can putting a little time between seeing the item you want to buy and actually slapping down your money. Getting a second opinion often helps too. Take your sister, your best friend, your mom or dad with you, and ask whether they think it’s worth the price. And if there’s financing involved, figure out what the item will end up costing once you’ve paid the financing charges. If you don’t do this step, you’re deluding yourself and you deserve to feel like a dope.

The best way to avoid Buyer’s Remorse is to ask yourself, “What else could I do with the money I’m spending on this item?” Are you working toward a goal that would be served well by applying this money? Is there another priority that should take precedence? Figure out (or refocus on) what’s really important to you, and then put your money where it will do you the most good.

JUSTIFICATION VERSUS RATIONALIZATION

I was yakking with a TV news chick one day when she confessed that she and her husband sometimes go out for dinner and spend a lot of money. She said they could justify it because they eat at home most of the time. I said, “The only thing you have to worry about is your use of the word justify.”

If you’re spending money on dinner out because you have the money and you want to eat dinner out, why do you have to justify it? You don’t. Justification only comes into the equation when you’re trying to convince yourself or someone else that what you’re doing is okay. If you want to be honest about your shopping—instead of playing mind games—lose the justification and move to rationalization.

Here’s how rationalization works:

You see a new set of dishes and you really, really like them. You decide you want to buy them. You ask yourself two questions:

1. Do I have the money to pay for these right now?

2. Do I have another purpose for that money?

If you have the money to pay for the dishes, and you have no other purpose for the money—a bill that’s coming due, a savings goal, a debt that must be repaid, or an upcoming expense—and you want to buy the dishes, buy the dishes. If you have to justify buying the dishes