Legacy: Letters from eminent parents to their daughters by Menon, Sudha (books suggested by bill gates txt) 📗

you are not a star, and that is because we have taught you to be rooted in reality at all times. Showbiz is about make-believe. Everybody will rush to do things for you and pander to your every desire when you are on top. But the cameras that follow you everywhere will eventually fade and what will remain is the real world. If you occasionally wonder why we refuse to treat you like a star, it is because you are our daughter first and a film star later, and we want you to remember that you have to eventually return to the real world.

Dear Deepika, you are in an industry where there is much negativity, but I hope that you are the game-changer in it. As in every other industry, so too here, there is a place for everyone, and I believe that you don’t have to put anyone down in order to get work. If you can live your life without harming anyone, or talking badly about anyone, you can set an example for others. You might not succeed, you might even risk ridicule, yet continue to refuse to be a part of the circle of negativity. Strive to generate positivity around you even though you are too new and too small a player to effect a big change. Often you will find people who will lie and say untruths about you, but remember never to retaliate or talk their language. If what they say is untrue, ignore it. And if it is true, use their criticism to improve and transform yourself.

You are in an industry where there’s always going to be big money, but I hope that’s not your only motivation for work. I believe that it is important to try to be the best in whatever you do, regardless of money. Always focus on what you want to become as an individual and empower yourself to reach your goals without distractions. That big car or ‘things’ will follow later.

The things that really matter in life are relationships, honesty, and respect for your parents, and elders. Material success is important, not fundamental to happiness and peace of mind.

I have not always been perfect, but over the years I have learnt to strike a balanced view of life. After a life well lived, what is important to me today is peace of mind and good health. Your health is your most important wealth. Take care of it, nurture it.

I can’t tell you enough about the rejuvenating power of prayers and a little faith. You know it, of course, because offering prayers is a long-standing tradition in our family. Now that you are a professional with a demanding career, you might not always find the time to accompany us on our annual pilgrimage to Tirupati. Instead, spare a few minutes of your day, even if it is just twenty, to close your eyes and meditate, to think about God and you will see how much that faith in His power will strengthen you.

In the end, when your career is behind you, what remains with you and for you is family, the friends that you have made who will stand by you.

Live a life that is healthy, my children, and one that will allow you to live with your own conscience. Everything else is transient. And remember, no matter what, we are always going to be there for you.

Lovingly,

Papa

P.P. Chhabria

.P. Chhabria was born in pre-independence Karachi into a wealthy trading family that raised its children with immense luxury. Pahlaj, (as he was fondly called) and his nine siblings grew up in a sprawling bungalow set amid lush gardens and towering trees. He still remembers the happy times when the kids would go off on jaunts in horse carriages that were specially maintained for them, with dedicated staff to supervize.

But that life of comforts soon changed into a nightmare when his father died unexpectedly of a massive heart attack, leaving behind a grieving wife and young children. Almost immediately afterwards, his elder siblings speculated, unwisely as it turned out, in the commodities market and had to sell the family assets to repay creditors. And yet, he says, his mother, a hardworking woman who slogged silently to tend to her family, never complained because she knew her boys had to sell the family assets to honour their father’s name.

Twelve-year-old Pahlaj was put to work in a small wholesale cloth merchant’s shop, working as a lowly paid worker sweeping and cleaning, doing odd jobs around the place and offering tea and refreshments to the people who came there to tie up business deals. For the young man who had been used to having a paid servant to bathe and dress him, this came as a huge blow and proved to be a humiliation which he says had him raging against destiny.

The tough years continued, with one menial job after the other, till his family packed him off to faraway Poona to work as a servant in his paternal aunt’s home for a monthly salary of Rs 30 and lodging.

Looking back at his life on a high summer Pune afternoon last year, PP saab, as he is fondly called in his adopted city where his stature now is that of a loved family elder, told me it was his deep longing to free himself from the life of indignity and bondage that led him on a journey that began as a small time salesman of electrical accessories to the head of a Rs 4,000 crore plus conglomerate.

‘It has been a journey of great learning,’ said the 82-yearold patriarch of the Finolex group of industries, who continues to lead a life of discipline and hard work, despite the fact that the younger generation has stepped in to look after the business. Being a salesman who hopped from one tiny shop to the other in the