The City of Crows by Bethany Lovejoy (novels in english .txt) 📗

I reached into my pocket and withdrew the glass vials. “Three times a day, every single meal. Try not to drink too much water or shower too often, she allocated you extra doses but, it’s better if you don’t stretch it. In your final moments you should take whatever’s left, it’ll make it easier for you.” I nodded to myself, reassuring myself that I’d correctly repeated the instructions before dropping the vials in his hands.

He caught them. His face fell as he watched me shrink out of his reach. Still, he reached for the vials,shoving them into his coat pocket without a moment’s hesitation. He’d take one the second he got home, I knew that. “Thank you, Lyra,” he said, his eyes boring holes into the side of my skull as he sat beside me. He was reluctant to get up, slow to allow the side of the umbrella to cover only himself. His black eyes watched me, waiting for a response.

What could I say? “It was nice knowing you, Leo.” Anything but that.

He nodded, not a hint of a smile visible on his face. His expression almost reflective, I couldn’t help but wonder what he must be thinking. “It was nice knowing you too, Lyra,” he said , his hand jutting out in my direction, as if a handshake was a viable way to say goodbye when one was dying.

I couldn’t resist the urge to touch him one last time. His hand wrapped around mine as I gingerly laid my palm in his. The heat from his palm seemed to radiate into mine. It was unfair, it would always be unfair to have met him, known him, and felt this warmth only to have it taken away so suddenly. That short, simple shake was nothing more than painful to me, and it was one of the most unfulfilling moments of my life.

With that, he got up and began to turn away. I couldn’t tear my eyes off him. A part of me, a loud and demanding part, wanted to chase after him. To do something, anything. I wanted to tell him the truth, to tell him that I loved him. But the louder, more predominant part of my brain won out; the coward.

He’d leave. It would be over. I’d go back to my lonely, disappointing, unfulfilling life. I’d find a new job at a new bookstore, and continue living in Marlow Heights. I’d have to find a new roommate, but then, wouldn’t that make it easier? I couldn’t live with Yvie watching me, waiting for me to breathe again. She would likely move in with Gigi, begin forming the life that she deserved, begin the process of forgetting about me. Hopefully, everyone would forget about me.

Still, despite knowing that, I couldn’t tear my eyes off Leo’s back. I could never do it; I couldn’t run after him. Nothing would change the fact that I wasn’t that type of person. I had to understand that our story ended there.

I had to ignore the way that his steps slowed, I had to pray that the wind would keep pushing his umbrella forward, guiding him away from me, keeping us apart just as fate intended. I had to fight down the scratching in my throat, which so loudly demanded…

“Leo,” I betrayed all sensibility with that word.

It was impossible for all the distance that we stood apart, unimaginable with the volume of the rain pounding against the sidewalk; but he stopped. His head tilted towards the sky, umbrella lowering as he stopped.

My mouth fell open, I was unable to contain myself as I watched him. Did he hear? Did he know? His umbrella ruffled in the insistent wind, urging him to keep moving forward.

“Leo,” my voice grew louder, legs wobbling underneath me. I couldn’t let him go, for once I couldn’t let the world make a decision for me.

My feet beat hard against the pavement, cold wind and pouring rain tried to stop me. And yet, I couldn’t. I couldn’t imagine stopping, turning around and going home alone. The heavy rain pelted against my face and entered my lungs, but if the cold and the howl of the wind couldn’t stop me, then neither could they.

“Leo!” A yell, an actual yell escaped my lips, swallowed by the rainstorm but not forgotten. “Leo!”

His shoulders rose and fell, did he think he imagined it?

“Leo, Leo Hoang!” His feet began to move again, to walk with those impossibly long strides away from me. There was no hope, not really, and yet “Leo Hoang, I love you!” My scream hit the air, scattering the crows off of electric lines and gaining the attention of those around me, but did it reach him?

He stopped. For a moment, he did not move, he seemed to process what had happened. It was impossible that he could have heard. The wind fought harder against his umbrella, and yet…

Eyes. Beautiful black eyes, perfect black eyes, wonderful black eyes. They stared toward me once again as he looked over his shoulder in surprise. A white cloud of steam from the cold erupted from his mouth, all the air leaving his body. He heard.

I couldn’t move any further underneath that gaze. “Leo, please just—” I called, and yet I truly did not know what I would do next. What ifs ran through my mind, each one worse than the last, and yet, maybe if I—

He stepped forward just the smallest step. Still the wind fought him, still it urged him away. Away from me, away from this, into the reality that he knew. But his hands loosened, another daring step in his direction while I could barely move. His eyes wide, like a man seeing the sun rise for the first time. He heard.

His hand tightened around the umbrella as the wind gave a final push, a harsh breeze knocking the umbrella out of his grasp, attempting to take him with it. And yet he paid it no heed, nor did he give weight