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I have fallen for a man who is in many ways so like the free-loving parents I ran from?

I always thought I wanted stability and figured it was synonymous with predictability.

I was wrong. This man is both rock and adventure.

All I have to do is hold on.

I struggle to find words to express what I’m feeling, but in the end I say nothing and simply press a kiss over his heart. Then I lift my head and find his warm eyes on me.

“I should go pee on a stick,” I whisper, and those crinkles I’ve grown to love appear at the corners of his eyes.

“Yeah.”

Not long after he walks out of the bathroom, the stick I left on the counter in his hand. He managed to distract me with some kissing and light petting while we waited, but now the butterflies are back. I don’t even know what I want it to say.

“Tell me,” I prompt him.

Too nervous to look myself.

_______________

“We’re having dinner at Arrow’s Edge,” Tse announces.

He’s about to leave to go to Paco’s place.

We’ve just finished breakfast and Blossom announced she wanted to go into town and stop in at Nature’s Oasis to grab some groceries for dinner tonight.

This is after Tse and I filled in my parents over waffles, something I felt we couldn’t avoid. Surprisingly they took the news in stride and agreed to keep it to themselves until I was much further along.

I’m going to be a mother.

When Tse told me we would need more space, it took me a moment to clue in. Then I burst out in tears I now know are the result of raging hormones. No wonder I’d not been feeling myself and seemed weepy all the damn time.

I’m pregnant.

I’m having a baby and I’m terrified, but also excited.

Tse’s words from earlier keep coming back to me; It’s never about the destination, it’s about the ride. I’m trying, but still my mind is already attempting to anticipate and problem-solve any roadblocks up ahead. Tse and my parents seem almost too casual about this.

I haven’t been paying much attention to the conversation but I did hear what Tse just said.

“At Arrow’s Edge? Since when?”

“Finn’s birthday,” he answers dryly.

Oh no. With everything happening this last little while, I’d almost forgotten about it. In fact, I just now realize I haven’t seen him in over a month.

“I can’t believe I forgot.”

Tse’s hand finds the back of my neck and he gives me a little squeeze.

“We’ve had a lot going on, babe.”

“What about my parents?”

“They’ll come,” he says matter-of-factly, as if that wasn’t even in question.

I make a mental note to call Lisa at some point this morning anyway; to give her a heads-up there’d be two more mouths to feed. I can’t bring myself to think about my parents in a motorcycle clubhouse, it’s too much to wrap my head around, so I just let it go.

“I don’t even have a gift for him.”

“Good thing we’re heading into town, then,” Blossom pipes up. “Tse can go to work, Duff will take care of the dishes and the dog. Right, Duff?”

My father nods. He doesn’t care as long as he doesn’t have to go shopping.

Ten minutes later, we’ve dropped Tse off with his tools from the back of the Jeep and are heading down the mountain.

“It’ll be good for him,” Blossom mumbles, as usual starting somewhere in the middle of her thought process. It can be hard to follow.

“What’ll be good for whom?”

“The baby, for Tse.”

I stop at the stop sign at the bottom of the road and turn to her.

“What makes you say that?”

“Oh, my Sophia, you’ve found yourself a good man, but it won’t be smooth sailing. His aura is full of dark shadows. Tse carries a lot of pain.”

My mind instantly goes to the scars on his back.

Over the past weeks I’ve discovered the thick rope of tissue under his chain tattoo isn’t the only one. There are others, not quite as visible, but definitely there. The pretty ink only skin-deep, barely covering the story underneath.

I haven’t asked him how he came by them. I already know he had a very difficult childhood and concluded he’d been abused. He never talked, and I never questioned. Now I wonder if I should have.

“Good thing my baby girl is strong,” Blossom says, patting my knee. “You’ll need to be.”

Tse

“Fuck. I keep thinking the woman is talking to me, the way she’s waving her hands.”

I’m sitting beside Nosh at the bar in the clubhouse and follow his line of sight into the kitchen, where Blossom is wildly gesturing while talking to Lisa.

“Strange bird,” he signs, shaking his head.

I grin. She does look like some kind of exotic bird with all her flowing scarves in bright colors. Duff isn’t much better in his tie-dyed shirt and socks in sandals, sitting on the large sectional with some of the kids who are trying to explain their game to him. They look entirely out of place in the clubhouse, but oddly enough seem perfectly comfortable here. I bet they’d be comfortable anywhere.

Sophia, on the other hand, is tense. She’s walking through the clubhouse with Finn’s little hand in hers—he just started walking—but every so often darts looks in the direction of her parents. My eyes are constantly drawn to her. Watching her with Finn has a whole new meaning now.

I watch as Wapi stops by her, exchanging a few words. The bright hot jealousy I used to feel at seeing him with her is now no more than an alert awareness; no different from any other man who’d stop to talk with her.

A split second later she looks over at me, a smile teasing her lips. That feeling I sometimes have, when my heart feels too damn big for my chest, washes over me. It’s moments like this—when we’re physically apart, but still somehow connected—I wonder if this is what love feels like.

I jump at the sharp elbow in my ribs, and look over at Nosh.

“Goner,” he rasps

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