Radley's Labyrinth for Horny Monsters by Annabelle Hawthorne (parable of the sower read online txt) 📗

people your tits on the internet, ordering pizzas for people you don’t like. And apparently discussing the restorative properties of my spunk.”

“We were just comparing notes.” Naia gave him a mock pout. “I mean, if you’re going to bring strange girls home, we’re gonna talk about your junk.”

Mike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I suppose that’s fair.” He looked down at Jenny. She stood patiently on the edge of the fountain. If he didn’t know any better, he would think a child had left her there. “You’re not talking about my junk with Jenny, are you?”

“That’s actually a sore subject,” Naia whispered. “The whole ‘not having a body’ issue.”

“Oh.” That made sense. Jenny had been a young woman when she had been accused of adultery, then burned at the stake for being a witch some centuries ago. “I’ll tone it down a bit.”

“You’re so considerate.” Naia kissed his cheek. “So what next?”

“We wait for Beth to get here. I’m not entirely certain how I’m going to break it to her, but I’m afraid we’re going to need to borrow her body. Jenny said that she’s been through the Labyrinth, and it would be easier to guide me while inside a body. I suggested using mine, but then I would be in the doll and not much use. That and apparently she can’t use mine.”

“That would be the soul exchange,” Naia whispered. “Anyone who tries to boot you out ends up going against that chunk of my soul.”

“Like in the Dreamscape,” Mike said, remembering how he had found Naia hidden inside his own psyche.

“Exactly,” Naia said. “It’s your secret weapon.”

“I’ll have to remember that.” Mike crossed to the other side of the fountain. “Well, I guess I’d better get ready. I’m not sure when Beth is getting here, but she said she was coming early.”

“Good luck.” Naia waved at Mike, and he walked back inside. He grabbed the dagger from where he had hidden it, then sat on the couch with Jenny. The doll sat with him, kicking her legs on the edge of the cushion. Mike watched the doll, wary of any sudden changes in behavior. Their talk had been relatively brief, Jenny communicating through pictures in his mind more than anything else. While it was clear that she hadn’t yet forgiven him, it seemed she was just as eager for a second chance as he was.

Mike slid the dagger out of the sheath, inspecting it for the first time. He expected a magic weapon capable of cutting through most anything to be lots of things, but boring wasn’t one of them. The blade had a small groove in the middle, the hilt a simple T shape. The handle had been wrapped in leather that looked old. He wondered if it would glow in his hands if orcs came near. Or was it trolls? He was having trouble keeping his thoughts straight. He swung it experimentally. Could he actually use it on a living creature?

The doorbell rang, the sound echoing through the house. Taking a deep breath, he looked out the window. He couldn’t see who was at the door, but he did see that the woman in white was missing from his front yard. Shit.

“Please be Beth, please be Beth,” he whispered under his breath, then answered the door, the dagger clenched tightly behind his back. Beth stood on the porch, a bag over one shoulder and a handful of files in the other. There was no sign of the woman in white, but the cold feeling in his gut intensified. Leaning out the door, he looked all around, wondering where she could have gone. Cecilia appeared briefly by her swing, then shrugged. She clearly had no idea either.

“Come in, quickly.” He pulled Beth inside by her wrist, shutting the door behind her. Letting out a deep breath, he looked outside again. “Did you happen to see anybody else out front?”

“No. Should I have?” The question didn’t seem to faze her at all, which meant she must be telling the truth. It suddenly occurred to Mike that the snake woman out front could just as easily cast a spell to blend in or maybe even become invisible. Rubbing his face with the palms of his hands, he sighed. The anxious feeling in his gut was still there, and he was convinced that if he looked out one of the windows, he would see the witch staring back in. His mind filled with visions of the front yard, teeming with snakes. It had never actually occurred to him that inviting Beth over meant putting her life in danger.

“No, don’t worry about it.” He was about to tell her a lot of things, things that weren’t going to make sense, and he felt that starting with a society of witches trying to break into his house would be a bad idea. “It’s a long story, but we’ll get around to it eventually.”

“So what did you need my help with?” she asked. Today she wore a white blouse with a black pencil skirt that clung tightly to her thighs with black shoes to match, and her hair had been pulled up into a bun. As usual, she was a vision to behold, but something was off. Mike looked at her for a few seconds, wondering where to begin. He felt antsy, appraising Beth once more. Why couldn’t he shake the danger sense in his gut?

“It’s complicated,” he told her, unsure of how to continue. “I want to show you something.” He walked into the living room and stood next to the fireplace. Jenny had returned to her position on the mantel, so he picked her up and held her out. “Do you remember when I gave you this?”

“Yes.” She took the doll from him. “I took it home with me. You said to get rid of it.”

“It isn’t just a doll. Here, may I?” He took Jenny back from her before setting the doll down on the table. “So I suppose you are