Leaving Home by Chase, A. (life books to read .txt) 📗

left to let us be with you. He knew you wouldn’t really want to see him, and considering how Tony feels about him at the

moment, it was a good idea on his part.”

Peter hadn’t known Chaz had been there. The last time he remembered Chaz being

around him, aside from a few minutes ago, was inside the truck.

He closed his eyes and sighed. “Right now, I don’t know what I think or feel, Les. I just want to heal and get out of here. Once they release me, I’ll think about what I’m doing.”

“Understandable.” Les trailed his fingers over Peter’s forehead, soothing him. “Go to

sleep, Peter. One of us will be here when you wake up.”

Exhaustion overwhelmed him, and he drifted along the tide of sleep, more than willing

to forget everything going on around him.

* * * *

After flopping onto a bench outside the hospital, Chaz buried his face in his hands and

sobbed. How the hell had he got so bad that he would risk Peter’s life because he was high?

Jesus Christ! He was so stupid, and had been so reckless with something so precious and rare that once it was broken, he’d never be able to fix it.

He remembered how relieved he’d felt when he’d seen Peter open his eyes in hospital.

Chaz didn’t know what he would have done if Peter had never regained consciousness. It

hadn’t mattered that the surgeons weren’t worried about Peter’s recovery. All that mattered was how guilty Chaz would have felt if anything else had happened to his love.

“You love him, don’t you?”

He dropped his hands before shooting to his feet. Les stood in front of him, arms folded

over his chest. He studied Chaz’s face, obviously noting his tear tracks and his absolutely wrecked expression.

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“Of course I love Peter, but it doesn’t matter anymore. I destroyed any chance I had

with him.” Chaz rubbed the back of his neck. “Also, I’m going to lose my job when the head of the PBR hears about this accident.”

“That’s not the important thing in all of this. You love Peter, and it’s the only thing that matters. What would you do to get him back? Would you not contact him for at least six

months, and go into rehab until you can beat the addiction?”

Chaz frowned, but only hesitated for a second before he said, “Yes, I’d do all of that, for even a moment with Peter to tell him how very sorry I am for everything I did.”

“I’ll pay for the rehab and to get you there. When you get out, if you stay clean for at

least six months after that, I’ll see what I can do about getting you a job. But you can’t contact Peter at all until you’ve completed all of my requirements.” Les stared at Chaz intently.

“Why do this? After what I did to Peter, I’d think you’d be like the rest of your friends and want nothing to do with me. Or, like Tony, want to kick my ass.” Chaz wrapped his

arms around his waist, trying his best not to shake.

Les turned away to look at the far-distant mountains. “Oh, don’t get me wrong. I’m

very angry with you. You took something so delicate and fine, and damaged it. It’s not

irreparable damage, but still you almost destroyed it. It’s going to take some time and lots of love to fix what was broken.”

Chaz bit his bottom lip to keep from screaming at Les that he knew all the terrible

things he’d done to Peter. Les didn’t have to go over the list any more when Chaz could see it in his head, taunting him.

“But like I said, it can be fixed, and I don’t think you did any of it on purpose to hurt Peter. I’m not excusing you for taking the drugs. It was your choice to keep using them, even after you should have discontinued or sought help from your doctors. You’ll have to deal

with that, but I’ve seen you with Peter. Not just since the accident, when you never left his side until he woke.” Les didn’t look at him, just moved his gaze to the hospital.

“I couldn’t leave him alone, Les. I was so afraid he wouldn’t wake up.” Chaz could feel

the tremors rack his body, and he knew it was only a matter of minutes before he fell apart completely.

Les nodded. “I know. That’s why I’m giving you this chance, Chaz O’Brien. This one

chance to fix what’s wrong in your life, and earn the possibility of winning Peter back. That

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man up there loves you very much, but he doesn’t have the strength to heal and take care of you at the same time.”

Chaz’s sigh was interrupted by a sob. “I know. That’s why I left when he asked me. I’m

not good enough for him, and I’ve accepted that. I’m surprised we lasted as long as we did.

From the first moment we met, I really thought Peter would come to his senses and break it off with me. I mean, all of you could see how bad I was, yet he continued to believe in me.

He trusted me not to hurt him, and I did in the worse possible way.”

He jumped when Les patted him on the shoulder.

“As long as you’re willing to change the direction you’re taking on this path, then I’m

willing to give you a second chance. You’re a good man, Chaz, who needs a little help and hope. I’ll give you both for now.”

“All right,” Chaz said, throwing his shoulders back and holding his head high. “Tell me

where I need to go, and I’ll do everything I need to do to make myself worthy of being in the same room with Peter. I love him more than I love bullfighting. If I can only get one back, I want it to be him.”

Les squeezed his shoulder, then stepped back. “There’s a taxi waiting to drive you to

the airport, where my jet is ready to go.