Gametime: A Moo U Hockey Romance by Jami Davenport (shoe dog free ebook txt) 📗

And that’s where we stayed—in the middle of the ice on our backs. I gulped in air, trying to breathe despite the pain tearing through my chest and thighs. I stared up at the arena lights. A few feet from me, Patrick sounded as if he was struggling as much as I was.

I prayed he didn’t find an untapped reserve and scramble to his feet to resume our mad race. I’d have to do the same if he did, and I’d much rather lie here and bleed out, even though I wasn’t bleeding. At least not literally.

I was unable to focus and squeezed my eyes shut. The cold from the ice seeped into my overheated body.

I didn’t know how long we lay there. At some point in time, I heard the scraping of Patrick’s skates and his gasps as he struggled to his feet.

Oh, fuck no. I scrambled to stand, ignoring my abused body’s outraged protests.

We faced each other with five feet between us, both bent over at the waist, holding weary upper bodies with hands braced on our thighs.

We eyed each other like two prizefighters sizing the other up before the big fight. I prayed he didn’t start this insane competition over again, and my prayers were answered. Patrick didn’t seem any more interested than I was in finishing our race.

He raised his gaze and met mine. I glimpsed a new measure of respect in his blue eyes so much like mine. “I won.”

“Like hell you did.”

“Why are you doing this?” he gasped, still short of breath.

“Doing what?”

“Changing the way you play. Hogging the puck.”

I started to dispute the hogging claim and snapped my mouth shut. Maybe Lex was right. Maybe I’d overdone Coach’s instructions. I’d accept some of the blame. I’d never explained what was going on to my best friend in the entire world. Looking back, I’d made a grave error in judgment by not discussing Coach’s mandate with him. I hadn’t trusted him enough to have my best interests at heart, and I was ashamed I’d been such an ass.

“Because the Sockeyes coach talked to Garf. He wanted to see more out of me, and Coach Garf knew there was more in there. We’ve been working on my confidence problem. He felt I passed too much when I had a good shot. He challenged me to play to my potential.” I spoke between gulps of air.

“Coach Garf was part of this?” Patrick rose to his full height, and so did I.

I nodded. “I wanted out of your shadow. Do you fucking know what it’s like being the overlooked brother?”

A muscle jumped in Patrick’s jaw. “I thought you enjoyed your role. We had an understanding, this weird twin mojo where you always knew when to pass the puck to me so I could score.”

“We did. Did you ever think of passing it to me when I’d set up a good scoring opportunity?”

Patrick flinched. “It’s not like I’ve never done that.”

“Not often. You’ve been programmed to believe you were the better player by our dad, our coaches, anyone remotely related to hockey in our lives. I was told to play a secondary role as the guy who enabled your greatness and to be happy with that role.”

Patrick gaped at me as if dumbstruck. “I never saw it like that. Never knew it bothered you. I thought you were happy with how well we clicked.”

“Do you know what it’s like living in your shadow, being compared to you, and always coming up lacking?”

“Yes,” Patrick said honestly.

I squinted at him, not understanding.

“Do you know what it’s like being known as the dumb twin? The one who barely passes his classes? To be told by Dad that I’d better have a hockey career because that’s the only thing I’m good at? The only thing I’m smart enough to do?”

My turn to be shell-shocked. “I had no idea you felt that way.”

“You know what else? You want the truth?”

“Yeah, I fucking want the truth,” I said.

“Here it is, plain and simple. I’m jealous of you. You’re graduating early with honors. You’re going pro. And you have Naomi.”

“I don’t have Naomi. Not anymore. Besides, you and Dad are the ones who claimed she was using me.”

“We were wrong. You’re the one she wants.”

I shook my head. “Not anymore. I saw her with you. It’s always been you.”

“You saw me with her?” He scowled and shook his head. “I’ve never been with her. She doesn’t want me.”

“I saw you near the locker room last week, arms around each other and having an intense conversation.”

“Fuck.” Patrick rolled his eyes and snorted. “Are you really that dense? She’s in love with you. I was comforting her because she was upset about you pulling away from her.”

“Then why did she break up with me?”

“For a smart guy, you’re really stupid. She wanted to do the right thing for your future even if it meant losing you. Everyone was telling her you needed to concentrate on hockey, including you, and didn’t have time for a relationship.”

“I struggled with that. I still don’t know where I am.”

“You’ll need to figure that out, bro. I can’t help you there. You do love her, don’t you?”

“Yeah, but the timing is off.”

“The timing will always be off. Do you think it’ll get any easier when we go pro? When you’re gone more than you’re home? When you live your life in a fishbowl and belong to your fans? You think then the timing will be right?”

I considered his words for a long moment. He had a point, but right now I had more immediate matters to settle. Naomi could wait. My brother and I were on the verge of mending fences. “I’ve missed you, bro.” I didn’t care if my words might be dismissed as mushy or whatever, I’d take the chance.

“I missed you, too. Maybe I’ve been purposely drawing away so it won’t be as painful when we’re not together anymore.”

“Maybe we both have.”

“When you started dating