REAPER: GOLDEN SKULLS M.C. by Rebecca Joyce (elon musk reading list TXT) 📗

“What about the buildings?”

“Smoke and Viper are going to help the local fire department do a controlled fire. The land was signed back over to the parish to do as they pleased. I suggested maybe a wildlife refuge or a park. Maybe they can make something good come from all of this madness.”

“How is she?”

“She still hasn’t woken up.”

“Talk to her, Reaper. Tell her everything.”

“I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“How about the beginning.”

What was he talking about? What did the devil need to tell me? I already knew so much. I knew he wasn’t what he seemed. He is a liar, a murderer. That was enough. He helped others trafficked men, women, and children. He should be in jail, not beside me while I lay helpless, unable to defend myself.

I heard a door close and the devil sigh. I didn’t have to see him to know something was bothering him. I could hear him.

“I don’t know what to say, Remi, other than I am so sorry I wasn’t there to stop Hellhound or Snake. If I could kill them, I would, but someone beat me to it. Chisel is going to be fine. Healer was able to stop the bleeding. He’s going to need therapy for a while to learn to speak again, but he’s alive. Shamrock is beside himself, Remi. He feels like it was his fault you were taken. I tried to tell him it wasn’t, but he doesn’t believe me.”

It was nobody’s fault but my own. I trusted when I shouldn’t have. I was happy to hear that Chisel was going to live. That made me feel a little better, but I wondered if Chisel knew what Reaper did with him being in the Golden Skulls. Did he do it behind their backs? Was it just him? Did any of the others know? I hoped Shamrock didn’t. I really liked him. He was a good friend to me. I know losing Snake was going to be painful for him. They grew up together. Yet, Snake was his namesake…a snake. He delivered me into the hands of my own personal hell and said nothing. Not even sorry. At least Hellhound seemed remorseful, but even he too betrayed me.

They all did.

Every one of them.

“The night you were taken, I learned that the people who I was helping stop such atrocities were the very people who were guilty. I couldn’t believe it. For so long, I worked with them, I knew their families, helped them find people who were taken, and they were the ones kidnapping them all along. I feel like a fraud. Like it’s all my fault. Then, I learned that my sister was taken too. I lost it baby. I destroyed everything I saw. If it weren’t for Ghost, I would have burnt down the clubhouse with me in it.

“Ghost was the one who brought me the evidence my father kept hidden from me. He was the one who told me that my own Uncle worked with them, giving them information on the club. They knew everything. Where to hit us, and how hard.

“When the dust settled that night, reality set in that I had lost you. Failed to keep my promise, and I lost it. I went dark baby. I hurt Player, almost hit my mom. God, I was so lost worrying about you. All I wanted was to keep my promise, to keep you safe, and I couldn’t even do that. I failed you.”

As I lay there and listened, I didn’t want to believe him, but I couldn’t ignore the sorrow in his voice. That was real. Why would he be remorseful for something he wanted to happen? He wasn’t making any sense. He said it himself. He worked with the others. He had been helping them all along. My brain was in chaos. I didn’t know what to believe. Who to believe. I wanted to rest. To sleep and never wake up.

“I tried to kill myself one night. The brothers don’t know about it, but I think Ghost suspects. I couldn’t deal with what I did and how my actions caused you more pain. I didn’t know if you’d be strong enough to handle being taken again. I feared you were going to die, and I wanted to be with you in death. I thought if I killed myself first, then when your time came, I would be there to help you move on. But I even fucked that up.

“I guess what I’m saying is that I’m useless without you, baby. I need you so much. I don’t think I can live without you. So, if you decide you don’t want to live in this world anymore, I understand. I will gladly go with you to the next. We can start over, no mistakes, no nightmares, just us.”

I didn’t know how to respond to that. He was completely sincere. He meant every word. I know he did. It scared me knowing that a man such as Reaper would give up his life to spend eternity with mine. I wasn’t sure I even wanted him there with me. My head was playing tricks on me. I couldn’t decipher what was real and what wasn’t anymore. I knew those who hurt me were Golden Skulls, yet I knew of Golden Skulls that were kind. Men who wouldn’t hurt an innocent for nothing. It was all confusing. Flashes of the bad men filtered in with the good ones. It was giving me a headache. I couldn’t handle it and succumbed to nothing once more.

I didn’t know how long I slept that time, but I felt things I hadn’t before when I woke. Like how sore my back was, my stomach ached, and Max’s hand still holding mine.

“How is she?”

Max sighed, kissing my hand. “The same. The doctors don’t know why she isn’t waking up. They think it’s because of all the trauma. Healer thinks she will do better once we can get her back