On a Roll by Beth Bolden (free ebook novel .txt) 📗

It was perfect. Not as perfect as Sean, but that was a high bar.

“But,” Sean continued, before Gabe could get his brain on the same page and ask if all this meant what he hoped it meant, “truthfully, I liked this even better.” He fit into Gabriel’s arms like they’d been made to hold him. Sean smiled, and leaned in, brushing a quick kiss across his lips. “I’m sorry, I made a huge mess out of things. It sucked to watch you walk away. It sucked to be the one who made you do that. But I couldn’t keep going like I was . . . I needed to get my head on straight.”

Gabriel held his breath. “Is it?”

“Yes,” Sean said with a nod. “It’s never been on straighter. And now so is my heart. I . . . I wanted to come back and tell you that I was wrong about so many things. First, I never should have been so goddamned stubborn about the name. It’s just a name. So I changed it,” he said, gesturing behind Gabe. “I’m not going anywhere. I’d rather cut my arm off than sell this truck. You aren’t getting rid of me that easily.”

“I changed mine too,” Gabriel said, with a sheepish grin, fingers tightening on Sean’s arms. “Or I am changing it. I . . . I guess I should have asked you first. But it felt like the one thing I could do to prove to you that I was the right guy. That I love you.”

“You know what? Ditto.” Sean grinned wildly, looking as happy as Gabriel had ever seen him. Happier, lighter, so much more alive. If Gabriel hadn’t loved him before, there was no way he didn’t love him now.

Gabriel kissed him then, because he didn’t want to hear what he was sorry for. He’d already heard everything he needed to hear, even if Sean hadn’t said it out loud.

He loves you, just the same way you love him. His heart did break then, reforming around the knowledge that even though nobody could ever know what the future held, it didn’t matter, because they had each other now.

“Wait,” Sean gasped, moving back a half step. Gabriel reached out for him, but Sean held his hand up. “It’s important that I say this. I mean it when I say I fucked this up.”

“I don’t care,” Gabriel said.

“But I care,” Sean said tenderly. “You deserve the apology and you deserve to hear everything that I couldn’t say before.”

“Okay.” Gabriel shoved his hands in his pockets so he wouldn’t interrupt him again.

“I love you,” Sean said, and Gabriel was unprepared for the way the words hit him. He’d known them, believed in them even when Sean had claimed he was wrong. But to hear them now? It was like the dawn of a spring day, even though it was the height of summer, and the air was so hot and dry. “I think I loved you a long time too, I just couldn’t face it. I . . . I didn’t think I’d ever really move on, but I did, and I didn’t even realize that I’d done it. I couldn’t let myself realize it. But every moment I spent with you, it was like you were showing me how to live again. I wanted it, I craved it, craved you. But even then, it was never just getting naked.”

“Hey, I’m happy to get naked with you anytime,” Gabriel interrupted, because he couldn’t quite help himself. The joy was bubbling out of him, like a champagne bottle that had just been unceremoniously uncorked.

“I’m gonna hold you to that,” Sean said seriously, and Gabriel laughed. “But I mean it, I love you. Today, tomorrow, every day in the future. Even if things don’t work out, and I sure as fuck hope they will, but I’ll always be grateful for everything you did for me.”

“I was a selfish asshole. I am a selfish asshole. I didn’t do it for you,” Gabriel said, and reached for him again. This time Sean came willingly, sinking into his arms, head resting on his shoulder. “Well, I kinda did it for you.”

“I know you,” Sean murmured into his ear. “No matter what you might try to claim, I know you did it for me.”

Chapter Sixteen

By the time they made it back to Gabriel’s apartment, he felt overheated and overwhelmed.

“I’m sorry,” Gabriel had said between hot drugging kisses they’d been trading in the shade by Gabe’s truck. Gabe’s new truck, which was now called something wild that was going to drive Tony around the bend. “I’ve got to head back to my place, at some point. Ren’s finishing up the recipe testing for the new menu, and I promised I’d help him.”

“New name, new menu, new recipes,” Sean said wonderingly. Still shocked that they had both ended up changing their name—and not only had Gabriel taken the step that he’d sworn he’d never do, he’d re-envisioned everything he was doing.

It was brave or it was crazy.

Maybe it was a little bit of both.

“Yeah, well,” Gabriel had blushed—or was that the flush from the heat and the arousal that Sean had felt pressed hard and hot against his hip? “Someone encouraged me to try something different. And I decided it was important to prove that I could.”

“And Ren is helping you,” Sean asked after Gabriel had signed the sign guy’s paperwork, officially transitioning On a Roll to Balls & Buns.

Tony was really going to lose his shit. Sean couldn’t wait to see it.

“Even better, Ren is doing it with me,” Gabriel said as they’d begun their long, hot trek towards his place.

“Really?” Sean was thrilled for Gabe.

“He even came up with the name that’s probably going to get me murdered,” Gabe said with a sly grin.

“Yeah, I want to be there when you tell Tony,” Sean said. “Promise me.”

“You gonna be around tomorrow morning?”

Sean squeezed his hand. It was almost too