Indigo Moon - Deborah Borrett (black books to read TXT) 📗

ankle
Sweater sleeves
Stretched
Peeking out beyond jacket arm
Draped over wrist
Hiding crisp white shirt
Tie revealed at collar
Shoes flat
Bag heavy on left side
Shoulders sloping
Feet moving slowly
One before the next
In repeated left-right motion.

He stood
Each day at the window
Watching
Waiting.
His head pounded each time she passed by
On rain drenched pavement.
He watched her
And remembered knowing her;
Knowing her
Whilst fly buzzed against pane
With continual noise;
Knowing her
Due to forced insistence;
Knowing her on dog stained carpet
That smelled old
And was littered with debris…
Stood watching
Remembering
Waiting for her
To amble past
While she ambled past
Remembering to forget him.


Traveller.

If I could travel to the farthest recesses of time
And collect each sliver of
Shattered mirror that reflects upon your life today
I would willingly do so.
If I could journey to the corners of your memory
To steal varnished glimpses of experiences past
Fresh and newly raw
I would do so, to understand you.
My imagination can travel through time
But truth cannot
So I wait for your to come to me and tell me;
Piece by piece your faltering words
Will hesitantly stumble from your tongue
And through salted hindsight
Your diction will piece together the mirror
To create a quivering reflection -
On one side of the glass
The adult eyes within the child;
And reflected,
Child tears falling down adult features.
You words will create for me a reproduced image.
As the ticking clock obscures my passage through time,
Prevents my physical transport to your past,
It commands time to proceed forward
Thus enabling my presence to protect y our future;
Travelling forward with you
In OUR Time.


TURNING.

Twilight beckons
Moonlight shimmering on dusted surface of flattened sea
Serenity mirroring the still façade
And shadowing the depth that stirs beneath.
On the shore the waves break
Pebbles cluster then roll,
Settling where the dusky foam
Betrays their onward journey.
Magnetic pull of moon upon gravity.
Slowly
Surely
The tide turns.

Distantly a clock strikes the ravaged tone of midnight.
Revellers cheer
Kisses imparted
Hugs thrown abundantly.
Midnight - the dawn of a new hour
The dawn of a New Year.
But You, you stand alone,
Distant
Ever watchful.
For the New Year brings for you
Just one more day,
Another hour,
Evaporating minutes,
Irreplaceable seconds.

And then it is gone.

The moment you could have clutched is vanished,
Vanquished to the era of The Lost,
It’s potential slipping from heart’s view,
Minds’ eye already replacing
With what will become You in the next moment.
What could have been is displaced
By the emotion of You
Who You are now - right this second.
And I realise the dream has changed,
Altered in texture
Shape
Smell.
What Was is superseded,
Substituted
By a new malleable force…
It’s shape ever shifting
Altering
Waiting for You to reach out
Grasp
Clutch
Mould it into what could be a Future.

In the Second that clings onto the Present
Comes
The magnetic pull of moon upon gravity
And the tide of emotion turns,
Word shaped pebbles cluster
And roll
Dulled by water

And a choice is made.


Unaware

It is beyond me.
I simply cannot comprehend
How you love me as you do…
…
…Or why.

You say you wish you could see inside me;
To the place where my thoughts are conceived
And ideas birthed.
I know you would not want to be there,
In the place where I am most wretched
Often unsure of where I get my own breath,
And desperate to tear my soul apart
In order to find a more worthwhile possession of myself.

You look at me with such tenderness,
Your chat - your causerie - loving, generous,
Almost blind in its care;
Not understanding how scurrilous and thersitical
My thoughts sometimes are
When I hate myself
Don’t understand my own direction
And struggle to see what I am really worth.

You ask me what I am thinking.
Sometimes you ask me when I am thinking nothing at all,
Paucity in my musings
My mind dull and numbed -
Saving & sparing weariness.
Other times my minds’ wanderings are in upheaval and disorder
Ponderings full of bouleversement.
I struggle to deracinate my ideas,
To displace my natural self examination
To uproot my environment of thought
From safety, to pain, to relief.
Yet you, with your simple questioning
And naïve inquisitively
Probe me,
Make me step beyond myself,
Extend myself into you
Into a place of trust.

It scares me so much.

I am afraid I will dream dreams I thought were passed,
Invite ghosts into my shadows,
Coax nightmares of distrust into our relationship.
My thoughts of the past are disjointed,
Intrusive,
I don’t want them to intrude between us.
Sometimes I wish I could take flight,
Subject my History to a fugue
So forceful in its nature
That it wipes clean the slate of who I am.

But this is me.
I am this confused person
A woman who is so much in love it makes me cry
And so afraid it make me weep.

Not afraid of you
But afraid of life.

You take my hand and pull me forward.
You coax
Offer platitudes,
Push me to discover who I am
With you beside me
And with me.

My journey to becoming whole has started… With you.


YOU.

A dance in the morning
Barefeet moistened with dew;
Rainbow crystals
Reflecting from droplets of water
Perfectly captivated by the dawn air.
Petals opening -
A perfect fragrance to capture my soul;
An aroma to fill my heart with you.
Sunlight peeping through
Delicate green shoots freckled with buds,
Dappled shadows on the grass.
Exact stillness of the glittered midnight sky
Reflected in my memory
Of the nights we spent apart;
When daybreak happiness
Became a shared dream of perfection;
A haze of embroidered life
Entwining us together through honesty.
You are more beautiful than everything
And the world reminds me of you.
Imprint

Text: All poems are copyrighted
Publication Date: 02-04-2010

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
to my Hoobie