The Life of Trust - George Müller (bill gates books recommendations TXT) 📗

of poor children, bereaved of both parents, and seek in other respects, with the help of God, to do them good for this life. I also particularly longed to be used by God in getting the dear orphans trained up in the fear of God; but still, the first and primary object of the work was, and still is, that God might be magnified by the fact that the orphans under my care are provided with all they need, only by prayer and faith, without any one being asked by me or my fellow-laborers, whereby it may be seen that God is faithful still, and hears prayer still. That I was not mistaken, has been abundantly proved since November, 1835, both by the conversion of many sinners who have read the accounts which have been published in connection with this work, and also by the abundance of fruit that has followed in the hearts of the saints, for which, from my inmost soul, I desire to be grateful to God, and the honor and glory of which not only is due to him alone, but which I, by his help, am enabled to ascribe to him.

November 28. I have been, every day this week, very much in prayer concerning the orphan house, chiefly entreating the Lord to take away every thought concerning it out of my mind if the matter be not of him; and have also repeatedly examined my heart concerning my motives in the matter. But I have been more and more confirmed that it is of God.

December 2. I have again these last days prayed much about the orphan house, and have frequently examined my heart, that if it were at all my desire to establish it for the sake of gratifying myself I might find it out. To that end I have also conversed with brother Craik about it, that he might be instrumental in showing me any hidden corruption of my heart concerning the matter, or any other scriptural reason against my engaging in it. The one only reason which ever made me at all doubt as to its being of God that I should engage in this work, is the multiplicity of engagements which I have already. But if the matter be of God, he will in due time send suitable individuals, so that comparatively little of my time will be taken up in this service.

This morning I asked the Lord especially that he would be pleased to teach me through the instrumentality of brother C.; and I went to him, that he might have an opportunity of probing my heart. For as I desire only the Lord’s glory, I should be glad to be instructed through the instrumentality of any brother, if the matter be not of him. But brother C., on the contrary, greatly encouraged me in it. Therefore, I have this day taken the first actual step in the matter, in having ordered bills to be printed, announcing a public meeting on December 9, at which I intend to lay before the brethren my thoughts concerning the orphan house, as a means of ascertaining more clearly the Lord’s mind concerning the matter. December 5. This evening I was struck, in reading the Scriptures, with these words: “Open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.” I was led to apply this Scripture to the orphan house, and asked the Lord for premises, one thousand pounds, and suitable individuals to take care of the children. December 7. To-day I received the first shilling for the orphan house.

December 9. This afternoon the first piece of furniture was given,—a large wardrobe. This afternoon and evening I was low in spirit as it regards the orphan house, but as soon as I began to speak at the meeting I received peculiar assistance from God. After the meeting, ten shillings was given to me. There was purposely no collection, nor did any one speak besides myself; for it was not in the least intended to work upon the feelings, for I sought to be quite sure concerning the mind of God. After the meeting, a sister offered herself for the work. I went home, happy in the Lord, and full of confidence that the matter will come to pass, though but ten shillings has been given. December 10. I have sent to the press a statement, which contains the substance of what I said at the meeting last evening. I have received a letter, in which a brother and sister wrote thus: “We propose ourselves for the service of the intended orphan house, if you think us qualified for it; also to give up all the furniture, etc., which the Lord has given us, for its use; and to do this without receiving any salary whatever, believing that if it be the will of the Lord to employ us, he will supply all our need,” etc. In the evening a brother brought, from several individuals, three dishes, twenty-eight plates, three basins, one jug, four mugs, three salt-stands, one grater, four knives, and five forks.

December 12. While I was praying this morning that the Lord would give us a fresh token of his favor concerning the orphan house, a brother brought three dishes, twelve plates, one basin, and one blanket. After this had been given, I thanked God, and asked him to give even this day another encouragement. Shortly after, fifty pounds was given, and that by an individual from whom, for several reasons, I could not have expected this sum. Thus the hand of God appeared so much the more clearly. Even then I was led to pray that this day the Lord would give still more. In the evening, accordingly, there was sent, by a sister, twenty-nine yards of print. Also a sister offered herself for the work. December 13. A brother was influenced this day to give four shillings per week, as long as the Lord gives the means: eight shillings was given by him as two weeks’ subscription. To-day a brother and sister offered themselves, with all their furniture, and all their provisions which they have in the house, if they can be usefully employed in the concerns of the orphan house.

December 14. To-day a sister offered her services for the work. In the evening another sister offered herself for the institution. December 15. A sister brought, from several friends, ten basins, eight mugs, one plate, five dessert spoons, six teaspoons, one skimmer, one toasting-fork, one flour-dredge, three knives and forks, one sheet, one pillow-case, one table-cloth; also one pound. In the afternoon were sent fifty-five yards of sheeting, and twelve yards of calico. December 16. I took out of the box in my room one shilling. December 17. I was rather cast down last evening and this morning about the matter; questioning whether I ought to be engaged in this way, and was led to ask the Lord to give me some further encouragement. Soon after were sent by a brother two pieces of print, the one seven and the other twenty-three and three fourths yards, six and three fourths yards of calico, four pieces of lining, about four yards altogether, a sheet, and a yard measure. This evening another brother brought a quantity of household articles, and told me that it had been put into the heart of an individual to send to-morrow one hundred pounds.

December 18. This afternoon the same brother brought, from a sister, a counterpane, a flatiron-stand, eight cups and saucers, a sugar-basin, a milk jug, a teacup, sixteen thimbles, five knives and forks, six dessert-spoons, twelve teaspoons, four combs, and two little graters; from another friend a flatiron, and a cup and saucer. At the same time he brought the hundred pounds above referred to. Since the publication of the second edition, it has pleased the Lord to take to himself the donor of this hundred pounds, and I therefore give, in this present edition, some further account of the donation and the donor.

A. L. was known to me almost from the beginning of my coming to Bristol, in 1832. She earned her bread by needle-work, by which she gained from two shillings to five shillings per week; the average, I suppose, was not more than three shillings sixpence, as she was weak in body. But I do not remember ever to have heard her utter a word of complaint on account of earning so little. Some time before I had been led to establish an orphan house, her father had died, through which event she had come in possession of four hundred and eighty pounds, which sum had been left to her (and the same amount to her brother and two sisters) by her grandmother, but of which her father had had the interest during his lifetime. The father, who had been much given to drinking, died in debt, which debts the children wished to pay; but the rest, besides A. L., did not like to pay in full, and offered to the creditors twenty-five per cent, which they gladly accepted, as they had not the least legal claim upon the children. After the debts had been paid according to this agreement, sister A. L. said to herself, “However sinful my father may have been, yet he was my father, and as I have the means of paying his debts to the full amount, I ought, as a believing child, to do so, seeing that my brother and sisters will not do it.” She then went to all the creditors secretly, and paid the full amount of the debts, which took forty pounds more of her money, besides her share, which she had given before: Her brother and two sisters now gave fifty pounds each of their property to their mother; but A. L. said to herself, “I am a child of God; surely I ought to give my mother twice as much as my brothers and sisters.” She therefore gave her mother one hundred pounds. Shortly after this she sent me the hundred pounds towards the orphan house. I was not a little surprised when I received this money from her, for I had always known her as a poor girl, and I had never heard anything about her having come into the possession of this money, and her dress had never given me the least indication of an alteration in her circumstances. Before, however, accepting this money from her, I had a long conversation with her, in which I sought to probe her as to her motives, and in which I sought to ascertain whether, as I had feared, she might have given this money in the feeling of the moment, without having counted the cost. But I had not conversed long with this beloved sister, before I found that she was, in this particular, a quiet, calm, considerate follower of the Lord Jesus, and one who desired, in spite of what human reason might say, to act according to the words of our Lord, “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth.” “Sell that ye have, and give alms.” When I remonstrated with her, in order that I might see whether she had counted the cost, she said to me, “The Lord Jesus has given his last drop of blood for me, and should I not give him this hundred pounds?” She would also have me take five pounds for the poor saints in communion with us. I mention here particularly that this dear sister kept all these things to herself, and did them as much as possible in secret; and during her lifetime, I suppose, not six brethren and sisters among us knew that she had ever possessed four hundred and eighty pounds, or that she had given one hundred pounds towards the orphan house.

I relate one instance more. August 4, 1836, seven months and