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Chapter Ten

Some time later Cat opened her eyes to a splitting headache, to see EricĀ lifting her out of his car,Ā Cat wasĀ a little disorientatedĀ andĀ confused.Ā  ā€œEric?Ā Whatā€¦ā€ ā€œShhh, itā€™s alright,Ā Cat just relax.ā€ She did just that, her head hurt to much to fight him, she couldnā€™t remember why this was a badĀ idea,Ā she neededĀ to get her thoughtsĀ together first, sighingĀ CatĀ melted into Ericā€™s strong arms,Ā lettingĀ his intoxicating scentĀ wash over her, god he smelled good,Ā hiddenĀ in her bedroom was a shirt she hadnā€™t given back to him,Ā she hadnā€™t washed it,Ā for the times she really needed him and he wasnā€™t there, the closest thingĀ she had was his unwashed shirt.Ā  Cat heard Eric open her front door, he mustĀ of taken the key from her handbag, he headed straightĀ for the bedroom with Cat still in his arms, she heardĀ him drop her handbagĀ and keys on the sideĀ on his way. Eric knelt on the bed andĀ carefullyĀ lowered her to the mattress,Ā Cat clung to his shoulders as he tried to pull away, not really sure why, but sheĀ didnā€™tĀ want to be alone, Eric was in her bedroom after what seemedĀ likeĀ a lifetime, Cat just wanted someone to hold her,Ā how she missed him, not caring right now how this wasnā€™t a good idea.Ā  ā€œCat?ā€ ā€œEric, please just hold me.ā€ Sighing Eric followed Cat down on the bed,Ā stretching out beside her, then pulledĀ CatĀ toĀ hisĀ side wrapping his arms around her. Ā  Arching up to her loversĀ touch as heĀ ranĀ hisĀ hands down the side of her breasts,Ā running her hands into his hair and pulling,Ā moaning outĀ loud, trying to move closerĀ to a naked Ericā€¦ Naked! Eric!Ā Cat froze, he was naked in her bed!Ā So was she, how had she becomeĀ naked,Ā what the hell had she been thinking, thatā€™s just it she hadnā€™t been, Cat tried to remember Eric bringing them here and getting into bed with her, when nothing! SheĀ would remember if he made love to her wouldnā€™t she? Cat snapped her eyes open to bright sunlight streaming through theĀ bay windows.Ā Cat feltĀ like some time had passedand the position of the sun indicatedĀ that it was morning, she had sleptĀ hours,Ā EricĀ was running kisses down her neck andĀ his leg slid in between hers,Ā oneĀ hand cupped her breast, while the other circled her bottom pulling her close to his morningerection, Cat almost closed her eyes, as her blood ranĀ hot, No! She couldnā€™t let this happen, if Eric had feelingsĀ for Claudia and he was changing his life for her, she couldnā€™t be the other woman andĀ destroy that,Ā all that he had done in the last few months showed he was in love with Claudia. He had said to his mother that Cat had ended things,Ā that was true, maybe asĀ Claudia had said,Ā Allison was giving Eric grief aboutĀ Cat, maybe it was timeĀ Allison andĀ CatĀ had a talk,Ā EricĀ neededĀ toĀ get on with his life.Ā Remembering the conversation last night between Allison andĀ Eric. Suddenly Cat felt sick, She knewĀ in her heart she was pregnant, all the pieces had clicked together yesterday after Allison had asked Eric if there was any chance, she knew she couldnā€™t tell Eric if he had found happiness with Claudia, a baby would totally wreckĀ things for him,Ā Eric would hate her,if she did anything toĀ destroyĀ his relationship,Ā Cat put the thoughtsĀ of being pregnantĀ in a box in her mind and closed the lid, she couldnā€™t think aboutĀ that now, only when Eric was gone could sheĀ work through her thoughts.Ā She moved her hands to his chest and pushed ā€œNo! We canā€™t do this!ā€ Pushing harder away from Ericā€™s lovers touch, sighing Eric let her go and sheĀ swung her legs to the side of the bed pulling the sheet with her wrapping itĀ around herself ā€œYouĀ shouldnā€™tĀ be here Eric, thank you for staying with me, butĀ we canā€™t have sex it isnā€™t right.ā€ Cat couldnā€™t look atĀ him, her face was red with herĀ embarrassment,Ā beingĀ naked in bed with Eric when he was with someone else, just wasnā€™t right.Ā She heard Eric moving ratherĀ thanĀ saw because she still had her back to him, the mattress lifted as he removed hisĀ body from it. Keeping her eyes down becauseĀ she knewĀ he was naked. ā€œWhy canā€™t weĀ make love if youā€™re willing?ā€ CatĀ almost gave a sarcastic laugh only holding back at the last minute,Ā makeĀ love,Ā really!Ā had sex more like it,Ā she didnā€™t want to get into a fight right now, she wanted him to leave, so she could openĀ that box insideĀ her mind and think about the impact that was going to have, so sheĀ repliedĀ still looking anywhere but himĀ ā€œĀ Iā€™m not willing! Yes,Ā my body might very well be, my mind isnā€™t,Ā plus we shouldnā€™t be togetherĀ not now, you have someoneĀ else in your life,Ā itā€™s not right you being here,Ā it wouldnā€™t be fair to Claudia.ā€Ā Cat finished in a soft tone, hoping he would tell her that he and Claudia are not together and there was a good reason for theĀ photo andĀ blurb in the paper,Ā Cat could hear Eric getting dressed almostĀ angryly, had he just remembered Claudia, was he angry with her for makingĀ him stay last night? Did he have plans with Claudia last night had she wreckedĀ them,Ā tears filled her eyes. Cat lifted herĀ feet up on the bed and placedĀ her head on her raised knees, not wanting to but she started to think of the baby she carried and Eric hadnā€™t gone yet,Ā Cat couldnā€™t believe it, except for that first time they had been soĀ careful, always using protection until Cat had started to take the pill, Eric had told herĀ he wouldnā€™t be happy if she got pregnant onĀ purpose,Ā what he didnā€™t know was she had never wanted to be like her mother,Ā a single parent,Ā lookĀ at her now pregnant alone and the father of her baby was dating someone else,Ā it was just her luck. WhenĀ thingsĀ had ended with Eric,Ā CatĀ had stop taking the pill,Ā and she had fallen pregnant straight away, over the last few months sheĀ had been so emotional that she hadnā€™t even noticed herĀ missing periods,Ā at leastĀ she knew who the father of her baby was!. Baby!Ā She still couldnā€™t believe it, just didnā€™t seemĀ real, she was carrying a little life inside her, she couldnā€™t tell anyonenot even Joanne, this will have to be her little secret,Ā she didnā€™t know if she would keep it from Eric, understanding his feelings about children and her getting pregnantĀ or anyĀ lover getting pregnantĀ for thatĀ matter, she just didnā€™t know if she could,Ā not yet anyway, maybe not ever, Eric didnā€™tĀ know about her family history and would never understand this was anything but intentional. If he had ever asked her anything about her family she would always change the subject, their relationship had never been commitment based, so she shared bare facts,Ā he knewĀ she came from a foster care family, nothing of her real mother or theĀ life she had ledĀ before going into foster care. Cat foundĀ she didnā€™t open up about that time to anyone. If theirĀ relationship had developed into more,Ā she would have told him, but as the monthsĀ wentĀ on Eric had spent less time with her.Ā Eric had never grown to love her like the love she felt for him. ā€œI think I betterĀ goā€ Eric said, making Cat look at him, she had been lost in her own thoughts, he was fully dressed now,Ā standing on the other side of the bed, watching her frowning. Cat noddedĀ  ā€œMumĀ wants you to see a doctor, would you like me to get someone to comeĀ and see you here.ā€Ā  Cat didnā€™t want anyone Eric knew to seeĀ her, quickly she said ā€œNo! Iā€™ll go and see my normal doctor today,Ā tell Allison everything is alright, itā€™sĀ just the lasting effects of the flu, Iā€™m just run down, I will take today off to see the doctor, then I might work out with Allison about taking sometime off.ā€getting away was just whatĀ she needed, addingĀ ā€œafter I see the doctor, Iā€™ll call Allison about the time off and arrange it with her.ā€Ā She had plans to make. Nodding Eric agreed ā€œĀ I donā€™t see that as a problem Cat, you do look unwell and you have lost a lot of weight, would you like me to fix you something to eat before I go?ā€ Why was he being so nice? Cat wondered.Ā The thought of food made her stomach roll, breathing in slowly, the last thing she needed was to throw up in front ofĀ Eric, with his motherā€™sĀ question still ringing in his ears, he would guess she wasĀ pregnantĀ indeed,Ā CatĀ shookĀ her head ā€œ No thanks, I want to shower first, thanks for staying last night, Iā€™m fine now, you haveĀ a office to get to, I promise to see a doctor today, then Iā€™ll call Allison to reassure her Iā€™m ok and arrange the time off.ā€ Eric nodded,Ā handsĀ on his hips, he looked soĀ handsome standing there clothes wrinkled, his chin covered in dark stubble, hair all over the place. ā€œMake sure you do,Ā Mum isĀ really worried about you.ā€Ā  His Mum was worried!Ā not Eric, realising nothing had changeĀ betweenĀ themĀ with a sinking heart, they had spent their time here, never atĀ Ericā€™sĀ place, due to more chance of getting caught together by his mother or the press. Maybe she hadnā€™t ingrainedĀ herselfĀ in his life,Ā was thatĀ why she was so easy to walk away from.Ā Eric moved around to her side of the bed and kissed her cheekĀ surprisingĀ Cat. ā€œMake sure you look after yourself.ā€ Eric saidĀ before leaving the bedroom, she heard the townhouse frontĀ door closeĀ aĀ few seconds later. Cat touched the cheek Eric had kissed, heĀ hadnā€™tĀ touchedĀ anywhere else, it felt soĀ final. Why did she feel so disappointed, she had needed him to go. Cat decidedĀ not toĀ analyse her feelings anymore, laying a hand on her stomach. she was having a baby,Ā Cat smiled. She may be an unmarriedĀ mother, she wasnā€™t anything like her own parent, she would loveĀ this baby and never let them feel unwanted, it was created by herĀ love. Even if not by Ericā€™s,Ā this child would not feel anything but loved and special. Better to have one parent who loved it than no love at all. Feeling sick,Ā CatĀ jumped up and just madeĀ it to the toiletĀ in time.

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