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He says to the seller and looks at you. “Me too.” You smile. “And two Cokes?” He asks and raises his eyebrows. You nod and he wraps his arm around you. You sit on a bench and eat. It’s a lovely evening – the stars are in the sky and everything is so quiet. “Look!” he says and points at the sky. “Our stars!” he giggles. “Yeah, you and me.” You mumble. When you have finished eating, Niall takes your hand and you frown. He smiles mischievously and you follow him. He lies down in the middle of the road. “Are you officially crazy, Horan?” you ask and look at him. “Let’s do it! It’s from Notebook and I have always wanted to do it with the one I love.” He smiles and stretches out his arm. You take it and cuddle up next to him. “But seriously, what if the car comes?” you whisper. “Nah! There won’t be any cars. We’re living in a peaceful countryside. We’re in Ireland.” He giggles. “Still…” you whisper. “Relax, sweetie.” He says and strokes your hair. “It’s funny, but I love doing these mad things with you.” You say and look at the starry sky. “I love…” Niall is about to say, but something holds him back. “(Y/N)? I think-“ he mumbles, but you already see it. “A car!” you yell and take his hand. He stands up and pulls you away from the road. “That was close.” He gasps. “Yeah, there won’t be any cars!” you imitate Niall. He bursts into laugh. “It’s not funny.” You mumble. “No, it’s not. But you’re cute.” He whispers and takes your hands. “I love you.” He says. You smile and look at his bright blue eyes. “I love you more.” You whisper and tap his nose. “What? No!” he shouts and picks you up. “Put me down!” you giggle, but he just kisses you. “I love you! I love you! I LOVE YOUUUU!” he yells over the city. “You’re crazy.” You whisper and wrap your arms around his neck. “Crazy about you, Miss.” He whispers and pulls you into long and passionate kiss.

Niall takes your hand and you walk in silence. You can’t stop thinking about tomorrow, about school and his tour. “Niall?” you whisper. “Yes?” he says. “Um, are you going on a tour?” you ask awkwardly. “Why are you asking?” he mumbles. “Just answer me.” You whisper. “Yes, I am.” He says. Your heart breaks – months again without him. “Oh…” you whisper and tears fill your eyes. “Hey.” He says and pulls you into hug. “Don’t think about it. Yet.” He says. “When are you going?” you ask. He looks at you. “Let’s not think about it.” He says again. You let go of his hand. “Why can’t you tell me?” you whisper angrily. He doesn’t say anything. “Well it’s easy to find out.” You mumble and take your phone. He grabs your hand and squeezes it. “22nd October.” He whispers. You look at him and can’t believe your ears. “In three days?” you ask. He nods. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to upset you.” He whispers. You stop walking. Tears are streaming down your face. You have to go to school and now Niall leaves you. He comes behind you and wraps his strong arms around you. “I love you.” He whispers in your ear. “I love you too.” You sob. “I’m sorry.” He says. “It’s not your fault. But it hurts.” You mumble. “I know. It’s horrible.” He says and takes your hand. You stand there in silence, while you’re crying. He is stroking your hair and hugging you. “I never know quite what to say when you’re upset. And it tears me apart that I can’t always help you. Just know that I’m always here for you, and if you ever fall I’ll be there to catch you, and if you ever feel lonely at four in the morning, I’ll be there to talk to you. Know that I’m aware of all your pain and all the sadness you have, and that I’m willing to help you carry it. Just know that I love you and that it rips my heart apart to know you’re not happy all the time.” He whispers in your ear. “Just be with me.” You say. “I will. My heart always is.” He says. “And my heart is yours forever.” You say. “And mine is always, always yours.” He whispers, takes your hand and puts it on his heart. “It beats for you.” He says. You smile and pull him into hug. “Everything will be fine. Yes, we’re going home tomorrow and one adventure will end, but we will have so many adventures together.” He whispers. “I will go on tour, but I will be back. It ends eventually.” He says. You nod and he wipes your tears away. “You’re right. I’m a moron.” You laugh. “My little moron.” He whispers and hugs you tightly. “Moron is a carrot in Welsh.” He says proudly. “Good. Then I’m your little carrot.” You laugh. “I love carrots.” He mumbles and kisses your forehead.

 

This is the day. This is the day when Niall goes away again. He throws his clothes into the suitcase. You just sit on his bed and look at him. He’s in despair. You press a smile on your face and promise yourself to make everything as easy as possible for him. “You will be back. Soon.” You smile. He nods. “I will.” He smiles and sits next to you. He pulls you into hug and kisses your forehead. “I promise I will. And it’s European tour, so I can come home whenever you need me. The ocean isn’t separating us.” He mumbles and takes your hand. His hands are trembling. “Are you coming to the airport? Please.” he asks. You’d like to say no, but there are tears in his eyes, so you smile and nod. “Of course.” You whisper and kiss him.

 

“Be a good girl then.” He mumbles. You nod. “I will.” You say and try not to cry. He takes your hands and kisses them. “Be a good boy then.” You say. He smiles and nods. “I will.” He mumbles and looks at the ground. “If they didn’t take pictures of us, I’d cry like a little kid.” He whispers and looks at the fans. “I know. Me too.” You whisper. He smiles and taps your nose. “You will call me?” you ask. He nods. “Promise you won’t fall in love with another man?” he asks. You burst into laugh, but Niall is serious. “Don’t laugh. I’m serious.” He whispers. “No, I won’t.” you say. “Promise?” he asks. “I promise.” You smile. “Niall, it’s time.” Paul whispers in his ear. Tears are streaming down your face - you can’t help it. “Okay, (Y/N), listen to me.” He says and takes your hands. “I love you and I’m always here, remember?” he asks and touches your heart. You nod. “Do you remember how we played the guitar together and studied this song called Little Things?” he asks. “Yes, I do.” You whisper. “Every time I sing this song, I will think about you and how much I love you.” He smiles. “You’re beautiful.” He whispers. You pull him into hug. He wraps his arms so tightly around you and buries his face into your neck. He starts singing quietly in your ear.

 

One Direction - Little Things

You never love yourself half as much as I love you. You’ll never treat yourself right darling but I want you to. If I let you know, I’m here for you maybe you’ll love yourself like I love you.

“Niall!” Paul takes his hand. “Coming.” He shouts. He wipes away your tears and taps your nose. You grab his hand and he pulls you into kiss. “I love you, beautiful.” He shouts over the airport. “I love you too.” You smile. He squeezes your hand and you see tears in his eyes. You look at your hands – you’re both wearing your bracelets. You smile and kiss him quickly again. “It will be fine.” You whisper and let go of his hand. “Come now, lover boy.” Paul says and pulls him away from you. Niall goes with him and you feel so empty inside.

13 chapter

You’re at school – the most horrifying place in the world. You sit on the floor and listen to the music. What’s the point of it all? You could light yourself up and it would feel the same way as being at school. Niall didn’t call either. You blame Paul, but deep down inside you know it wasn’t his fault. Niall just didn’t call. Maybe he was tired… who knows.

“(Y/N)!” you hear familiar voice. “What do you want, Caspar?” you ask angrily. “Woah! Why so angry? Your leprechaun left you?” he laughs. You stand up, but he grabs your hand and pulls you back next to him. “Listen.” He whispers. “We’re going to my club on Wednesday. Well it’s my and my friends’ club. Dad lent me money for it and everything. Anyway, if you want to have fun, come too.” He says. “We all know your Niall is out of town. You need to be cheered up a little bit. If you know what I mean.” He says and winks at you. “No, I don’t know what you mean.” You say furiously. You’re not going there anyway. What is he even thinking? “Just come. There will be only us – people from our school.” He says. You look at him and smile in disbelief. “Are you coming?” he asks. “No.” you say. “Oh, just think about it.” He says and gives you a VIP-ticket. “Just in case.” He whispers and leaves you finally alone. What is he thinking? Niall is away, yes. But you’re not going to a club with him and other idiots.

 

You look at your phone for the millionth of time. Niall hasn’t called since he left. What if something happened? No, you would be the first to know. And he was in this French TV show yesterday. You throw your phone on your bed. He has just forgotten you or found someone better. You knew this can happen. You burst into tears and jump on your bed. You throw the pillows on the floor and bury your face into your hands. “If you want to have fun, come too.” You hear Caspar’s voice in your head. You take your bag and find the ticket he gave you. Today is Wednesday – today is the party. You just want to forget everything. And this is a good way to do it. If Niall has forgotten you, then you should too? You don’t want to think about the negative sides of it, so you quickly get dressed and soon you’re searching for the club.

“(Y/N)!” you hear Caspar’s voice. “You came. I knew you would.” He whispers. “I am already regretting it.” You whisper and look at his stupid smirking face. Now you are angry with yourself. You leave Caspar alone and get a drink. What were you thinking? Niall loves you - he wouldn’t leave you. You know that! But you’re acting like

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