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my sad look, Courtney grabbed my hand and continued. “Stop worrying. He’ll call. You just took him by surprise. That’s all.”

 

Joe stopped by the table with our tacos, and I suddenly wondered why he always waited on us, rather than having one of the waitresses serve our table. Maybe there was something to this Courtney and Joe idea that Seth had suggested.

 

I decided that thinking about the possibility of the two of them hooking up would help keep my mind off Seth for a while, so I dipped my toe in the water. “Joe looks especially hot tonight.” I waggled my eyebrows playfully at her.

 

He did look rather handsome, with his unkempt, surfer-dude look. Court responded to my prompt with a non-committal “Mmmhmm.” So I pushed on.

 

“He has his own business, he’s kind, he’s smart, he’s funny, and he’s crazy about you, Court. A girl could do a lot worse.”

 

“Did he ask you to talk to me?” Her face crumpled as she said it. “I told him to let it go.” As she slid out of the booth, she added, “It will never work out, so just drop it. I need a tissue. I’ll be right back.”

 

I was shocked that Courtney and Joe had talked about the possibility of a relationship and was slightly hurt that Court hadn’t mentioned it to me. How could she think of herself as unworthy of being happy? What kind of demons was she carrying around with her?

 

When she returned to our table, I weighed my words carefully before saying, “Sweetie, I don’t care if you want to be with Joe, or with someone else, or with no one. I just want you to be happy.” She smiled, so I continued, “You are a wonderful person, and you deserve happiness. I hope that you are able to find peace with yourself because you shouldn’t be carrying this heavy burden. If you aren’t able to talk to me about it, maybe we should get you an appointment with a professional.”

 

“A shrink?” Courtney snorted. “Been there, done that. It didn’t work for me.” At my concerned look, she continued, “I’ll be fine. I just have some things from my past that I’m not proud of. I need to work through them in my own way and in my own time.”

 

“In other words, you want me to butt-out.” I smiled to let her know I wasn’t angry. “You take your time. I’m always here for you if you need anything. You know that, right?”

 

“Same goes for you, Sister. Hug it out?” Court stood and extended her arms to me.

 

“That is soooo hot, but a kiss would really seal the deal for me,” Joe said near our ears as we hugged, ending the sweet moment. Court balled her napkin and threw it at him as he swaggered away with a big smile on his face. I shook my head with an exasperated, “Men!”

Chapter 19

 

I was at work. It was Thursday, and I hadn’t heard from Seth since letting the dreaded three-word salute fly on Sunday. I checked my cell phone again. Nothing.

 

I had started to text him more times than I could count. I had pulled him up in my contacts to call him numerous times, as well. Each time I chickened out, wondering why he hadn’t contacted me.

 

I pulled my phone out again, and then I put it back in my pocket with a sigh. “Oh for Peter’s sake,” Annie shook her head, “just text him.”

 

I had been around Annie so much that I barely noticed anymore how she butchered idioms. She looked like she was completely exasperated with me. “Give me the phone,” she glowered, holding out her hand.

 

I tried ignoring her, but she shook her hand, indicating she meant business. I tentatively moved it towards her. She snatched it up and quickly typed a message. “There, let the chocolate chips fall where they may,” she said handing the phone back to me.

 

I looked at the words she had texted to Seth from my phone. ‘I’m off tomorrow. Want to go on a picnic?’

 

“I’m not off tomorrow, Annie.”

 

“You are now. I’m sick of looking at your gloomy mug of root beer.” I tilted my head at that one, but she continued on. “Get out of here and go fix yourself up. You look like a ragamuffin. Relax in a nice, warm bath, or take a yoga class or something.” She placed a hand on my shoulder and gently pushed me toward the door, accentuating her point.

 

From anyone else, her brutal honesty might have hurt my feelings, but I knew Annie loved me unconditionally and had my best interest at heart. So, I followed her not-so-gentle nudge and waved behind my head as she yelled after me, “Don’t worry. He will call, or he’ll have me to deal with.”

 

I smiled at the thought of the tiny firecracker that was Annie trying to take on big, strong Seth. He probably wouldn’t know what hit him if she shook her finger at him and defended me with her characteristic, nonsensical zingers.

 

When I got home, I took Annie’s advice and pampered myself a little. I put my cell phone on silent and hid it in a drawer, so that I wouldn’t be tempted to check it compulsively. Then I relaxed in my sudsy tub, letting the jets massage my achy body for nearly an hour. After that, I slathered myself with the thick, body cream that I save for special occasions.

 

I went to Courtney’s room for nail polish and beat Tab to the punch by hissing at her when she glared at me from Court’s bed. I settled on deep blue for my toenails and seashell pink for my fingernails. Once my fresh mani and pedi were dry, I glared at the drawer with the cell phone in it.

 

Surely he had called or texted me back, right? It would be rude not to. But what if he hadn’t? I was almost scared to look, but knew that I needed to. “Here goes nothing,” I muttered as I blew out a breath and looked at the phone. Nothing.

 

I plopped down on the floor as the tears started to roll down my cheeks. I tried to think of any other logical explanation for why he wouldn’t have contacted me. I knew that if he was sick or had been injured, his family would have contacted me. I wondered if maybe he had lost his cell phone with my contact number, and almost became hopeful, but there had been plenty of time for him to stop by to let me know.

 

I devised numerous scenarios to try to come up with a valid excuse for his silence, but shot each one down. I didn’t want to admit what I knew the truth to be. I was being blown off. That was the plain and simple explanation, but it hurt like hell to face it, especially knowing that it was completely my fault for saying too much, too fast.

 

A sob escaped my throat as I curled into the fetal position on the floor, devastated. I fell asleep that way and didn’t wake until morning. My body was sore and my eyes felt like they’d been rubbed with sandpaper. I stretched and scowled at my cell phone.

 

I hadn’t turned it off silent mode, so maybe I had missed something. I couldn’t keep the hope at bay, even though I knew it would be in my own best interest. I took a deep breath and pushed the button. Nothing. It was like having my heart ripped out.

 

I knew that I should enjoy my day off, but I just didn’t feel like doing anything. I climbed up on my bed and went back to sleep. Courtney’s knock aroused me from a deep sleep. She entered my room with a tray of food. I rolled away from her and tried to re-enter the sweet oblivion of sleep. “You need to try to eat something.” Her voice was filled with concern, but I steadfastly ignored her, and she left me alone.

 

I slept and slept until I had no concept of what time it was. The next time Courtney knocked on the door, she came in and sat on the edge of my bed. She saw the untouched tray of food and chastised me. “Ab, you didn’t eat any of this.” I didn’t respond, so she tried a different tact. “Time to get up. You need to get ready for work.”

 

“I’m off,” I grumbled at her.

 

“I talked to Annie and she told me she gave you yesterday off,” she responded. “Today is Saturday, and it is time to rise and shine.”

 

I was shocked that I had slept through an entire day, but I didn’t have any desire to get up. “Call Annie and tell her I’m not coming in today.”

 

“You never call in sick.” Her eyes were filled with concern.

 

I didn’t want her or Annie to worry, so I said, “I just need some more time, Court. Tomorrow is Sunday, and the shop is closed. I’ll be back to my mean-old self by Monday, I promise.” I made an effort to smile at her, but ended up just wincing. I hoped that I would be able keep my promise to her, but it didn’t feel possible.

 

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