LITTLE GIRL LOST - SARAH BETH LEE (tharntype novel english .TXT) 📗

go to this little party. He slapped him on the back as he agreed to go. He settled back in his chair as Damien began to talk about security protocols and the importance of trust and loyalty between each team member. He was right and Nick was well aware of the fact that he had crossed that line when he didn’t tell them about the initial glitch. He had been forced to tell Lucas when his tests had gone haywire due to the difference in time. He had traveled back over seventeen years rather than the one year it had been set for. Nick propped his feet up with his hands behind his head as he listened to the idle talk that floated around him. He knew he had no choice but to let them test the machine on someone else and see if they too ended up in 1993. He knew Zach would fill him in on anything of importance so he zoned out and let thoughts of Hannah fill his overloaded mind.

Hannah walked down the crowded snow covered street until she reached Maddie’s office. She knew she was a little early so she walked on to Martin’s café. She could see him through the window talking to his friends and customers. She pushed the door open and walked inside.

Martin looked up to see Maddie’s friend he thought her name was Hannah. He was surprised at how much she resembled Maddie. He had always heard that when a couple had been together for years that they began to look alike, he wondered if the same was true for best friends.

“Hannah what brings you by?”

“Hi Martin I don’t know that we have been formally introduced. I am Maddie’s oldest friend.”

“I know she talks about you all the time. So how are you?”

“I’m good thanks and you?”

Martin smiled and nodded his head, “Great so what can I get you a coffee to go?”

Hannah wrinkled her nose, “No sorry I don’t do coffee I am a diet coke girl. I’m on my way to meet Maddie for drinks and appetizers at Fast Eddie’s and I thought you might want to join us.”

Martin looked at the clock and saw that he had an hour until he closed. He knew that his brother Carter could handle the clean up so why not?

“Ok I have to be here until 7 but I’ll meet you guys there?”

Hannah smiled, “Perfect see you then.”

Hannah waved as she left the Café and headed to Maddie’s office. She wondered again what had been on Maddie’s mind earlier. She had not been herself and she knew that something had happened but what on earth could have made her sound so resigned and dejected when her day had started out so great? She walked into the office and saw Barbie the receptionist packing her bag to head home. Hannah smiled in her direction as she waved her to the office.

Hannah knocked on the closed door as she pushed it open. Maddie was putting some files in her bag and trying to smile at Hannah.

“Hi Hannah I’m impressed your right on time.”

Maddie looked in the mirror on the wall and freshened up her lipstick. She then she tossed it to Hannah, “Here you could use this.” Hannah caught the tube of lipstick and walked to the mirror. She dabbed her lips and applied the color to her bare lips. She replaced the cap and tossed it back to Maddie.

“Ok let’s go.”

Hannah walked out of the office with Maddie and made her way to her car parked on the corner. It was only a few blocks away but in these dropping temperatures it was too cold to walk. She found a parking spot in the rear parking lot and turned off the engine. She then climbed out of the car and hit the lock button on her key ring. She followed Maddie into the club that was already throbbing with people and music. Maddie made her way to a corner booth where no one would notice them. Hannah hadn’t told her about Martin so she placed herself facing the door so she would see his arrival.

Maddie clutched her bag tightly to her chest as she searched for something inside. She pulled out a file and laid it on the table in front of her. Hannah had watched her curiously as she searched for what appeared to be work related.

“Maddie I thought this was a friendly night out not work related.”

Maddie looked from the file in front of her to her friend sitting across from her. She knew what was in this file would change Hannah’s life forever but would it end well or would it make things worse? Maddie was torn between what she felt she had to do and what she should do.

“Hannah I just want to talk not as your councilor or therapist but as your friend. How are you really?”

Hannah looked at the scarred table top and ran her finger over a set of carved initials. She wondered what Maddie wanted her to say. She already knew how Maddie felt about Nick and it wasn’t good. She looked across the table at her best friend in the entire world.

“I’m good most of the time but the nights are the worst. When the lights go out and the house is still and quiet and the only sound is the thoughts screaming in my head. When there’s no one there to see me no reason to hide behind the mask of denial and lies that have become my life.”

Maddie ached for her friend her sister and she wanted to reach out to her. She wanted to tell her that she understood exactly how she felt and that it was okay but she couldn’t say that. She couldn’t tell her that she had lost her dad too and that it was okay to hurt. She tried to form the words to express what she was feeling.

“Hannah I know it’s hard but it will be okay.”

Hannah looked back down to the old worn table and she shook her head from side to side. She sighed and continued with her thoughts.

“Did you know that right after it happened I would sit and stare at my bedroom door and will it to open? I would sit there and wait to hear the door knob rattle and the hinge squeak as my dad pushed the door open and walked in to read me a story or to ask me how my day had been. I did that for years and even now as an adult I sometimes stare at my door and expect him to come bursting through at any moment. I know how bad that sounds but even now all these years later I still expect to see him walk through my door.”

“Oh Hannah honey I am so sorry. I understand and it’s normal to feel that way.”

Hannah looked up at Maddie with tears threatening to fall. She knew Maddie meant well but really how could she possibly understand what it had been like to lose her dad in such an unexpected and devastating way? Maddie had known her dad was sick and that he only had a short time to live. She had had time to make amends and to tell him that she forgave him for never being at home and that she loved him anyway, she had had closure. Hannah had never had that and it boiled inside of her like a cyst ready to explode.

“Maddie when the realization hits that he’s really gone it hurts all over again. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of him, miss him and see him in a hundred different faces in a dozen different places. I know you think I created Nick as a way to get through what happened and you think I am completely mad. I don’t know anymore maybe I did create this perfect guy, maybe I convinced myself that he was real and maybe it is his face that blurs with my dead father’s but what if that’s all I’ve got to get me through? But Mad, what if it’s not? What if he’s real, just a nice normal guy who helped a little girl find her way in a crazy out of control world? What if the reason I still see his face so clearly is because he touched me in a way that no one else ever could? Trust me Maddie I don’t need you to tell me how crazy this sounds but I know he’s as real as you and me and please don’t sit there and tell me he’s not.”

Hannah swiped angrily at the tears that had begun to fall at some point in her tirade. She could see the bar getting blurry and she hated that she had fallen apart in such a crowded place with so many unfamiliar faces glancing at their table. She grabbed a napkin and blew her nose.

“Hannah I am going to get us some drinks but please I think you need to see this.”

Hannah watched as Maddie slid the file across the scarred and battered table top. She ran her finger over the tab that read, NICHOLAS J O’BRIEN. Hannah felt the cold empty spaces filling her soul as she opened the folder and began to read.
Chapter Seven One Drink Too Many

CHAPTER SEVEN
ONE DRINK TOO MANY

Hannah sat at the table absently rubbing her forefinger over the carved letters in the table top. For some odd reason the feel of the rough wood digging into her fragile skin gave her comfort. She looked at the dossier and all the information that made Nicolas J O’Brien or as she knew him Nick real. She had always known that he was as real as she was but she had no way of knowing what to expect if she ever found him. She could feel her heart beating like a runaway train in her chest and she was sure that at any moment it would derail plunging her into the cold dark waters that had filled her heart. She had no idea what to do, should she read the file? Should she run as if she had never seen it? She stared at the cover sheet and she willed her fingers to move. She wondered was he a middle aged man now,