Our journey from engagement to marriage by Shipra Saini (animal farm read .txt) 📗

I don't deserve him

Preeti's point of view

Whole night I could not sleep. Riki's words are replaying my mind. I know her words are venomous but she said truth. I am just an ordinary girl and Siddharth is a multi billionaire. Why would he love me? He can get any girl he want.

He love me but he doesn't have trust on me this is why he didn't share his sorrows with me till now.

Who am I? Just an ordinary girl who fell in love insanely with a multi billionaire Siddharth kapoor. The dream of every girl.

I don't deserve him when i can't share his sorrows with me. I don't deserve his love when I was not with him when he need me.

I looked at Siddharth who is looking at me without a blink with his worry eyes.

I have been ignoring him since morning and i can see the longing in his eyes for me but Riki's words are keep echoing in my mind.

I turn my gaze from him to the stage where elders are giving there performance. Today is Neha's mehndi (henna) ceremony and tomorrow is her wedding.

My hand is also fill with henna but it's dry now. I looked at my right Aditya is feeding Aayushi because her hands are fill with henna and same goes with Anit jiju and Shivani didi. Pulkit jiju is also feeding Riya didi.

I wish i could also live these moments in my life once.

I and Siddharth have so many barriers in our love. Sometimes it seems like i can't crossed them to reach him and die in a half way.

"Hey..want drink." Emily came to me and set beside me on a chair. She have a soft drink in her hand.

I shake my head and gave her a sad smile.

"Sid sir can't get his eyes off from you. You looked pretty in this ocean blue lehenga." She said while looking between both of us.

My eyes fell on Siddharth but he is now looking at somewhere, lost in his thoughts.

"Thankyou.." i said while averting my eyes from him.

"Your performance were the star performance of yesterday's night." She said while sipping her drink.

I give her a smile. My eyes fell on her hand in which she is wearing a ring in her ring finger.

"You got engaged?" I asked her looking at her diamond ring.

"Oh! Yeah..i forgot to tell you. Nick proposed me directly to marry him. Idiot took long time to confess his love to me." She smiled while looking at her engagement ring.

"You also love him?" I asked her.

She nodded her head and said, "I don't know since when but it's long time now. I thought he didn't love me. I almost gave up on him but he surprised me to propose me directly to marry him. But i asked him time, so that we can know each other more before marriage." She said while giving me smile. I saw a blushed on her cheek.

Our eyes turned to stage where song is just stopped and Neha took the mice from Dj.

"Now..now..ladies and gentlemen may i have your attention please. As you know all the performances are done and you all can dance like maniacs but before that my friend Preeti will give the last performance of the night."
I looked at Neha with shock who is standing on stage with a mike on her hand and smirk on her face.

I shake my head to her with a horror on my face. I don't want to dance. I hate to be center of attention of everyone.

She narrowed her eyes on me and calling me on stage with her finger.

"Come on Preeti it's my wedding. You can't upset me and we all know how beautiful dancer you are.." she said.

"Neha please..i can't" i said.

"Okey fine don't dance but pull out some some romantic shayari (poem) from your treasure trove and tell us. As i know you are a fantastic shayari (poem) writer." Neha said.

"Bhabhi please.." keerti looked at me with her puppy eyes which no one can resist.

"Okey.." i said with a smile and walked to a stage. Neha hand me a mike and after giving me her encourage smile to me she leaved the stage.

My eyes started searching for Siddharth and when they meet to him his eyes are only focused on me. He is leaning to the chair and put his hands into his pocket while crossing his legs.

I closed my eyes and take deep breath. I opened my eyes and they met with his intensive one.

Mujhe aaj bhi yad hai jo pehli mulakat humari thi,
Dil mai kuch to hua tha jab teri nazar mujhse mili thi.

I write this poem long time ago but i still remember its every single word. 
Because it shows our love.

Ishq kya hota hai yeh pehli bar maine jana tha,
jab taron ki chav mai pyar ka izhar humara hua tha,

Chand tha gavha us chandni rat ka...
Chand tha gavha us chandni rat ka..

jab tere labon ne phli bar mere galo ko chuma tha.

My eyes didn't leave his eyes. I felt tears in a back of my eyes. I still remember the full moon night in my room's balcony where we confessed our love to each other.

Teri mohabbat mai had se guzar ker, Tujhe tuet ker chahne lagi hu..

Teri mohabbat mai had se guzar ker, tujhe tuet ker chahne lagi hu..
k ab log khte hai, mai meera si diwani hone lagi hu.

It's true I'm crazy about him. I can see the glossiness in his eyes. His eyes are glistening with unshaded tears. 
My vision also started blurring with tears.

Tu zindagi hai meri ye mai jaan gayi..tujhse hi meri pehchaan ho gayi..
Tune chaha tha jise mai wo yad purani ho gayi, 
tere ishq mai yara mai bin phero k suhagan ho gayi.

I whispered the last line while looking at only him and He straightened himself immediately after hearing the last line and looked at me with love like he is directly looking into my soul.

It's true i became his bride without any ritual. It's not matter we are officially husband- wife. I already looked at him as my husband. It's not matter what others said about me i already became his. My death also can't less my love for him because he lives in my soul. Every single vain of my body, every single drop of my blood know that they are only belongs to him.

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