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were taller than us both. I didn’t mind but when we reached the bonfire, I casually stepped away from him.

Tracey jogged over to us. “Hey guys! What’s up?”

“Just trying to get warm,” Matt answered. He opened his coat to her. “Need a polar bear hug?”

Her face brightened. “I’d love one.”

Matt drew her into his arms, but I noticed his eyes never left mine.

“There’s hot chocolate and donuts on the other side of the fire,” Tracey said, her voice partially muffled by Matt’s coat.

“That’s my cue. You guys want any?” I asked.

“I’m good,” Matt said.

“Me too,” added Tracey.

I rounded the bonfire and was almost to the crowded hot chocolate table when I heard, “What are you doing here?”

Christian stepped out from within the crowd almost as if he’d been waiting for me.

“I’m trying to have a good time, and I’d like to keep it that way.” I patted his chest twice and walked away.

“Llona, wait!” He jogged after me.

I whirled around. “What do you want?”

“You shouldn’t be here.”

“Why? Why can’t I be here?” I demanded.

“Just trust me. You shouldn’t be here.” He took a step toward me, but I backed up.

His expression fell. “What’s wrong? You used to trust me.”

“That’s before you became all Jekyll and Hyde-y on me.”

“I have never been cruel to you.”

“What’s your definition of cruel?”

His eyes closed briefly and for a second it looked like he was in pain. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. That has never been my intention.”

“Then what is?”

Christian sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I never intended to—”

“To what, Christian?”

He lifted his head and stared directly into my eyes. “To have feelings for you.”

This caught me off guard, but I didn’t let myself swoon. Too much had happened. “So you say you want me to be safe, but you don’t want to have feelings for me? Don’t the two go hand-in-hand?”

“They shouldn’t. Not for me at least.”

“Why?”

He glanced away. “It’s complicated.”

“No, rocket science is complicated. This shouldn’t be.”

He glanced past me into the darkness.

“When you decide to uncomplicate it,” I began, “let me know. Until then, I’m going to have fun tonight with my friends.”

I whirled around and practically pushed my way to the front of the hot chocolate line, but when I came face-to-face with Mr. Steele, who was serving the hot beverage, my anger quickly melted like an ice cube on fire.

“You look full of energy tonight,” Mr. Steele said to me in his usual velvet, sophisticated voice.

“Full of something,” I agreed.

He laughed. “Maybe you should join the football game over there, burn off whatever you’re full of.”

I glanced toward the lake. Several cars had parked in a big circle with their lights turned on, facing the center. The dark silhouettes of students moved within the light as they played with a glow-in-the-dark football.

“Go join them, Llona,” Mr. Steele encouraged. “You deserve some fun. Plus, they could use someone with your skills.”

“My skills?”

“I’ve watched you play basketball. You’re very good.”

My face reddened. Gratefully my back was turned to the fire so he didn’t notice.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted Christian walking toward us. To avoid another lecture, I quickly said, “Thanks, Mr. Steele. I think I will.”

I hurried away, glancing back a few times to make sure Christian wasn’t following me. I walked between two parked trucks, and just before I had the chance to ask if I could join the game, Mike called out to me, “If you’re thinking of playing, don’t. We already have enough players.”

Adam moved out of a headlight next to me. “We could use one.”

“Yeah,” May added. “You can be on our team, the winning team.”

Mike tossed the ball to a teammate across the field. “Whatever. Your winning streak is over.”

Even though car headlights burned bright, darkness still swallowed most of their light before it could have a real impact on the game. But I didn’t care. Playing football in the dark was like nothing I’d ever done before. It gave me the ability to hide much of my speed and agility, which turned out to be very useful. Mike was the quarterback for the other team, and it was just too easy to intercept almost every throw he tossed. His frustration was my elation. By my sixth pick, he became so upset he turned and tossed the football as hard as he could toward the lake. It landed on the ice and continued to slide away from us.

“Way to go, Mike!” someone yelled.

“Anyone bring another ball?” another asked.

I squinted my eyes into the darkness. The ball wasn’t too far away. I could see its glow partially concealed by a chunk of ice.

Behind me, another person said. “That’s all we had.”

“Nice, Mike. Way to ruin the game.”

I turned to the group and said, “I’ll get it.”

“I don’t think it’s safe,” May said.

“Sure it is,” Mike blurted. “The water’s frozen over. Let the show off get it.”

“If it’s so safe,” May snapped at him, “why don’t you get it?”

“It’s not a big deal. I got it.” I jogged to the edge of the lake and carefully stepped onto the ice. It groaned once but held. I stomped hard just to be sure. It remained solid.

I proceeded slowly, but after several steps and no more creaks or groans, I became more confident and ended up running and then sliding several times toward the ball, giggling all the way. Others laughed with me, and in a matter of seconds, I reached the ball. “Got it!”

Turning to go back, my foot pressed down, and at the same time I heard the sound of glasses clanking together. I glanced around to see where the noise was coming from, but after a few seconds, the clinking changed into sort of tearing. I wasn’t nervous until I felt the ice beneath me begin to tremble.

“You going to throw it back or what?” Mike yelled.

I held completely still, afraid of what was about to happen.

“What’s wrong?” May called.

“The ice,” I whispered back as loud as I could. “It’s cracking!”

“What?”

I glanced at my feet and slowly tried to slide one foot forward. Another ripping sound. My heart beat loudly in my ears and sweat pooled in my pits.

I immediately thought of what Sophie had taught me—think light-footed, think airy. I inhaled deeply and held my breath. I could do this.

But just like with Sophie, the ice beneath my feet melted, further weakening it. Water pooled around the soles of my shoes. Shit.

Maybe I could jump. I had enough Light coursing through me that I could probably make it. I crouched low.

As I did so, I spotted Christian running up the shore toward May. I couldn’t hear what he was saying, but he looked frazzled.

Placing my hand on the cold ice, I prepared to spring forward. Just as I was about to push up on my legs, the ice gave way, and I no longer had any ground beneath me to push off on.

Instead of going up like I’d intended, I fell into the cold water and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Chapter 25

When I was seven years old, I discovered roly poly bugs. I loved the fact that when I’d touch one, the bug would roll into a tight shell as a way to protect itself. I would find and gather as many of those bugs as I could until I’d have enough to play marbles with their hard, circular bodies. The instant one of the bugs began to relax from its shell, I’d touch it again and flick it into the other rolled-up bugs. I played this for almost an hour before my mom caught me and gave me a lecture about being kind to all creatures, especially those smaller than me.

I’d forgotten all about the bugs until the frigid ice water touched my skin. The Light within me retreated as quickly as a touched roly poly bug, leaving me to struggle on my own.

“Struggle” is too positive a word. I did manage to break the surface and gasp for air. I even managed to reach out to Christian, who I saw army-crawling on the ice toward me, but that was it. It was like

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