Benign Flame: Saga of Love - BS Murthy (best way to read an ebook .TXT) 📗

anything else,’ she resolved.

As Sathyam went on drinking, she reproached him at lunchtime,

“You better stop it now for your own good.”   

‘I can’t stand it in my right senses,” he said pleadingly.

“You’re making me helpless,” she said.

“Am I not helpless myself?” he said.

“At least, do have a bite,” she said persuasively.  

“Ok, I shall join you,” he said, emptying the glass.

After lunch, exhausted by fear, he slept for long and as he got up at five, he asked her to go to Sandhya’s place lest they should come visiting them.

“How am I to leave you now?” she protested.

“Honestly, now I’m uncomfortable even with you,” he said embarrassedly.

“I’ll stay in the hall, call me if you need anything,” she said.

‘At least, he drinks to lighten his burden, and he deserves it as well. But what about me?’ she felt, reclining in the sofa, and began to picture her future. ‘What could be the possible outcome of the scandal? He’s sure to lose his job, and may even find himself behind the bars. Oh, how that would ruin him and ridicule me. What have I done to deserve all this? Oh God, what’s wrong with my life? How long I have lived in a void for want of love, and then, that yearlong pining in passion. At long last, when I’m happy, here’s this tragic turn.’

‘Won’t high connections help?’ she thought at length. ‘Can Ranga Reddy come to our rescue? Isn’t he known to be close to the Home Minister? Even otherwise, won’t the case be hushed up, as the bigwigs are involved, no less than the Finance Minister? Perhaps our fears could turn out to be liars.’

At that, she went up to Sathyam to show him the silver lining, and found him still at drink.

“How I wish it comes to that,” he said, even a little relieved.

“I’m sure all this is bound to fizzle out in the end. Don’t we see, the reports of enquiry commissions whitewashing the scandals involving politicians. I’m sure this won’t be any different,” she said, sounding music to his ears.

‘God willing, if we get out of this hell, we’ll go to Tirupati, and I get tonsured,” he said feeling a little easy.

‘Whatever may be the itch, never ever grease your palms,” she ruled for the future.

‘I’ll resign my job and get into some business with that money,” he said taking her hand.

‘Leave aside morals, I think you deserve to keep the booty, if only for your motive behind grabbing it. And no less, for the way you’re suffering. Now let me call them so that you too can divert your mind,” she said, thoughtfully.

‘As you’ve given me hope, let me relax over a large. Why not you spend some time with them,” he said.

“I better do that, but do mind about your drink,” she said, getting up to change her sari.

In time, as he drank out that large, it dawned on Sathyam that the calamity of the moment had brought Roopa emotionally closer to him than ever before. With his spirits having soured thus, as if to steady himself, he made one more ‘large’.

-----

Having dragged her feet all the way to Sandhya’s house, finding it locked, a disappointed Roopa, nursing hopes of their early return, clung on to the gate for long. However, at length, caught between hope and despair, she felt as if her head was splitting into half and in the end as her weary legs took the homeward path, she thought,  

‘What a miserable day.’

Thus reaching home in disappointment, she sank into the sofa in exhaustion. However, in time, gripped by an impulsive need for company, to shed her melancholic overburden, she went up to Sathyam, and found him emptying the bottle into his glass.

“Why don’t you stop that god-damn drink and start showing some concern for me?” she said in irritation in spite of herself.

‘There’s no way I can help you now, why don’t you too help yourself with a drink or two?” he said invitingly.

“Why not, if that makes it a little better?” she said without second thoughts.

When she returned with a glass, he looked at her amusedly, and as she poured for herself from the fresh bottle, he stared at her wide-eyed.

“Haven’t I failed you all these years!” he said.  

“Better late than never, isn’t it well said?” she smiled, as she sipped that Scotch.

“You’re a sport really and I love you for that. I knew that, the moment I saw you,” he said in all admiration.

“Don’t I know that?” she said, turning coy.

“How did you turn into a hot chick from a cold fish?” he said, at length.

“Why rake up the past now?” she smiled.

“Tell me what has caused it,” he said, suddenly seized with curiosity.

“As one can’t drink from an empty glass, one can’t love with a lifeless heart,” she said.    

“Show me the other half of your glassful life,” he said.

“Know that it’s for my eyes only?” she said, rolling her eyes.

“As that spices up my life tell me about its recipe,” he persisted nevertheless.

“Take it, the essence of my love is flavoured by cupid’s passion,” she said, as she winked at him.

“You’re a hard nut to crack anyway,” he said, giving up his probing.

“What about your dinner” she said, extending her hand to him.

“I haven’t space even for a morsel,” he said, feeling his tummy.

 “I’m too tipsy to even eat; I wonder how you can drink like a fish, and yet remain steady!” she said drinking to the dregs.

 “Isn’t it the best compliment ever from you,” he smiled heartily.

“Then pay back with a peg,” she held her glass.

“You’re game, really,” he said, obliging her.

“Only to those who raise the bar,” she said in a drawling way, remembering her lover’s averment.

“Soon, you may beat me at my own game,” he said in awe; as she gulped half from the glass at one go.

“Wait and see,” she winked at him.

“I’ve always felt that I could’ve won your love had I obliged you then,” he said holding her hand.

“Why rake up the past; as we’re happy anyway,” she smiled.

“But still, we wouldn’t have lost what we’ve lost in those three years,” he said melancholically.

“Let bygones be bygones,” she said dreamily.

“You don’t know how I crave for your love; sadly you’ve never really known me,” he said ruefully.

‘”I was beside myself then but I value your love now,” she said taking his hand.

“Why not you study medicine now,” he suggested in hope.

‘It’s too late, anyway, but your consent that night could’ve made all the difference,” she said resignedly.

“I’m sorry, what else I can say now,” he said feeling bad.

“Any way, that’s life, full of ifs and buts,” she said.

“Can you ever pardon me?” he said taking her hand.

“I think all of us, in spite of our faults, are pardonable,” she said, pressing his hand.

“I always felt guilty on that score and that inhibited me with you,” he said withdrawing his hand, overcome by remorse all again.

‘I was aware of that, but I couldn’t help it, anyway it’s all different now, right,” she said reaching for his hand again.

‘You’re the life of my life,” he said, pressing her hand.

‘Thank you, but stop it now, at least for my sake,’ she tried to dissuade him, as he was mixing some more for him.

 ‘Why don’t you sleep in the hall tonight, I like to drink a little longer,” he said pleadingly.

“Ok, good night then, but if you feel hungry wake me up,” she said yawning, and picking up her pillow, she went into the hall.

Having had some curd rice with a mango pickle, she took to the makeshift bed, and as soon as she hit the pillow, she fell asleep.

Soon however, Sathyam in excitement woke her up saying,

“I’ve a brainwave Roopa; with that booty, you can open a nursing home and serve the sick. That way the bad money would serve a good cause, and above all, it will help me get rid of my guilt. Please don’t say no.”

“Oh, what a love, I’ll do anything for you now,” she said, hugging him tightly.

“Let’s move away the money to safety tomorrow itself; who knows, there could be a raid soon,” he said excitedly.

“Lie down here,” she moved away to accommodate him.

“Let me celebrate my Eureka moment, three cheers,” he kissed her good night.

Having bid him good night all again, an intoxicated Roopa fell into an exciting slumber.

 

Chapter 38

Subdued Beginning

 

At seven the next morning, Roopa woke up to Yadamma’s buzzer, with a hangover, only to realize that Sathyam was still in bed. At that, as she began to brush her teeth, Yadamma set out to sweep the staircase. Soon, as Roopa was at preparing coffee decoction for them and Sathyam, for he started having bed coffee for sometime then, Yadamma began sweeping the hall. At length, while Roopa in the kitchen was keeping watch over the boiling milk, Yadamma went into the bedroom to sweep it as well. Shortly thereafter as Yadamma, taking ayya to be dead, raised an alarm, Roopa rushed to him in panic and felt his pulse in vain, and at that, as she fell unconscious over him, fearing the worst, Yadamma rushed with the news to the Raja Raos still in bed.

Reaching post-haste, the nonplussed couple found their benumbed lover lay on her husband’s body. However, readily realizing that Roopa was breathing still, Raja Rao hurried Sandhya to fetch some water to splash her into her senses. Thus in time, as Roopa opened her eyes, Sandhya took her mate endearingly into her lap, even as Raja Rao caressed the bereaved in assurance. Even in her state of shock, Roopa found their touch reassuring and began to feel solaced by that.

There could be moments in life when one can feel empathy in a feeling touch of the concerned than a score of sympathetic words from them.

“What’s this tragedy?” sobbed Sandhya, inducing a flood of tears from Roopa’s eyes.

“Yesterday he was upset and went on drinking till midnight, oh, I can’t believe he is no more in the morning,” cried Roopa inconsolably.

Looking at the two empty bottles of Chivas Regal lying near the bed, said Raja Rao gravely,

“Maybe, he died of excessive drinking; perhaps you could’ve stopped him at some point.”

“What do you mean? Can one really die of drink?” Roopa said, perplexed.

“As it appears, sadly, he drank himself to death,” said Raja Rao, staring at Sathyam’s body gravely.

“But why didn’t you send for us all day?” said Sandhya.

“You were not at home when I came in the evening, and unable to bear the tension, I myself had a couple of drinks, and slept off. Oh, if only I knew,” said Roopa ruefully.

 “That might’ve saved a fine soul for us. But as they say, God won’t keep Himself away from good souls for long. Wonder why it doesn’t occur to Him that the world needs such, even more!” said Sandhya bogged down with tears.

“What else we can do now than braving the cruelty of fate?” said Raja Rao, consoling them.

“Oh, how fate has chosen me as the villain in his life. What an irony our life has turned out to be! While I slighted him all through, he died burdening me with his magnanimity,” said Roopa melancholically.

“Stop feeling guilty dear, after all, he died with a feeling of being loved by you. That’s what matters to his soul and to your conscience as well,” said Sandhya cajolingly.

“Maybe that’s the saving grace of my life with him,” said Roopa, staring at Sathyam’s corpse.

“It’s time we call the police,” said Raja Rao to Tara who came by then.

‘Leave all that to me, and take care of her,” said Tara, though beside herself.

At that, as Roopa realised that the police would come to take away the body for post-mortem, the irony of the tragedy dawned on her.

‘How he feared he would be arrested, but they would be here soon, to take away his body. What if they revisit to confiscate his booty as well?’ she thought feeling sad about it all.

Then, having recalled how relieved