Power Rangers In Space - Heather Ray (most difficult books to read TXT) 📗

without stumbling.

I had to wait a bit more before she finally found the right words to say to me.

"Carlos," she started, trying her best not to make eye contact, "we're friends, right?"

Uh oh. That didn't sound promising.

"I'd like to think so," I answered.

"Well, we are. We're really close friends. You've been with me through some hard times, and I think that we're as close as friends can be. I… I love you--"

She took a deep breath, and locked her sympathetic eyes with my expectant ones. "--as a friend."

It felt like I had a wad of bubble gum stuck in my throat. No air came into my mouth, no words came out. I blinked a couple times, and I almost pinched myself. This had to be a dream. It couldn't have been real!

"A… Ashley," I managed, "you'll always be my close friend. And I love you too… but we could be more--"

Ashley shook her head solemnly, pursing her lips. "No, we can't. I'm really sorry, but I just don't love you like that."

I wanted to crawl into some dark hole and die. She wouldn't even give me a chance! She was so startled that I even asked her, I assumed she never thought about the two of us getting together. She never realized how much I loved her? I couldn't believe it.

"We… we're still friends, right?" she asked timidly. I did my best to smile at her.

"Of course," was all I could get out, before I felt my throat close up again. I stood up, waved at her lightly, and left. I couldn't even say goodbye. It took all the willpower I had not to cry in her presence. I managed to wait until I was in my room, where I could shed a tear without shame.
Chapter Three

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry?
Have you ever needed something so hard
You can't sleep at night?
Have ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right?
Have you ever?
Have you ever?

I felt sick. I laid my heart on the line, and she stepped on it. She's probably pretty experienced in letting guys down easy, but it seemed kind of harsh to me. Maybe it's because I can't have an objective view about it.

I couldn't understand what went wrong. She shot me down before I even got the words out! It didn't make sense to me. Why wouldn't she give me a chance? How did she know so certainly that she didn't love me?

Those questions plagued me for quite a while. It just didn't make sense. Or at least, it didn't until I found out the reason why Ashley knew

she didn't want to be with me. She had someone else in mind.

Frankly, I don't know why I didn't see it. I guess twenty-twenty hindsight gives you special insight on earlier events. I mean, once I knew the truth, it was easy for me to see evidence to that fact dating back months. I just was too caught up in my own feelings to really notice.

The reason Ashley didn't give me a chance is because she was in love with Andros, native of KO-35 and leader of the Astro Rangers.

Chapter Four

Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life?
You'd do anything to look into their eyes;
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you?
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there?
And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care?

She'd liked him pretty much since she met him. I guess the tragic hero, cut off from his own heart, appealed to her. He… he intrigued her. And as a consequence, I didn't.

It took months of Ashley's indomitable charm and honest interest to finally break down some of the barriers Andros constructed to protect himself from more emotional pain. But like I said, Ashley isn't one to give up. Despite Andros' apparent coldness and even his initial dislike of us, she was persistent. And eventually, the mighty Red Ranger became a victim to her natural allure. Can't blame him, really.

Well, Andros and Ashley finally got up the nerve to talk about their feelings, and now they're pretty much a couple. On the surface, it's nothing serious. I mean, they've only been on a couple dates, and they don't spend too much time together. But, that's just the surface. It's quite clear, just by their body language, that they really feel strongly for one another. Dare I say, it's real love there. Or at least the foundation of real love. That's something that was lacking between Ashley and me. They, at least, are on a two-way street. Ashley and I were on a dead-end path, right from the beginning.

It took me a while to accept this. Actually, I think I came around easier than most guys in my situation would have. I could have been angry at Andros, thinking along the lines of "I saw her first" or something. It hurts when the woman you love winds up with a close friend, but I'm not that surprised. When I take a step back, and try and view the situation from a more objective point of view, I see how good a couple they make. Andros is still pretty cold and stoic, but slowly Ashley's passion is warming him from the inside. He's becoming a more well-rounded person. And now Ashley, who has finally found someone to really love, has someone to balance her out. Now, her inner fire has something to melt.

They make a nice couple… really, they do. And I'm happy for them. Really. I'm glad Ashley found someone to make her happy. Well, maybe not happy

. Perhaps… satisfied?

No, I'm not sure what

I feel for them. But I do know one thing… this matter has kept me up more than a few nights.

Chapter Five

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby?
What do I gotta do to get your heart?
To make you understand how I need you next to me?
Gotta get you in my world,
'Cause baby I can't sleep,

I'll be honest, it really hurts when I see them together. Every time I see Ashley grasp his hand, or the Red Ranger dash to the aid of the Yellow Ranger, I can't help but wish it were me. I can't help but wonder… is Andros really giving her all his heart and soul? That's what she deserves, and that was what I was ready to give. Could he really love her like I would have? Like I still do? Is he even capable of that kind of love?

Sometimes, I reflect back on when I first met Ashley. It was ages ago… even before we became Turbo Rangers. I was the soccer star, she was the head cheerleader. I walked her home from a game. I was instantly interested then, but I didn't really act on it. When I think about our first encounter, I can't help but ask myself, could things have been different? After all, I knew Ashley waaay

before Andros even came to our solar system. If I had made my move earlier, would I have had a chance?

Sadly, the answer is probably no. If Ashley really loves Andros like I think she does, then it would have happened regardless. At least this way, she wasn't forced into the situation of deciding between the boyfriend she has lukewarm feelings for, and the mysterious warrior who has suddenly become the object of her passion. She would have to choose between being true to her heart, and trying not to hurt me. In the end, all of us would have suffered. She'd be guilty, Andros would be too, and I'd be the dumped boyfriend, wondering what on Earth happened.

It's better this way. Now the only one hurting… is me.

Epilogue

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry?
Have you ever needed something so hard
You can't sleep at night?
Have ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right?

I wonder how long this hurt will last. How many more nights will I say up, pondering about what could have been? Asking myself a hundred questions, like What if we never became Power Rangers? Or, What if Divatox never destroyed the Power Chamber? Would we even have met

Andros?

Wondering about what could have been certainly isn't the way to live one's life. It'll end eventually. It has