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GENERAL
We need a new government…
ADMIRAL
It will give us happiness for the rest of our days.
GENERAL
Homer can be useful.

ADMIRAL
We should have at least eighty generals and as many admirals.
GENERAL
There are three generals for each soldier at the moment. It would be ideal to
have an army of only generals.
ADMIRAL
And admirals.
GENERAL
Of course.
The sailors bring some more bottles of wine as the ranchera comes to an end.
HOMER
My distinguished guests, you must sign my cheques now.
ADMIRAL
I have a short speech bought from the national factory.
GENERAL
I’ve got one from the same place.
The sailors bring a table covered with a green cloth. It is full of papers, pens, typewriters and calculators. A man without much hair bows in front of the people and sits at the table. They all gather around the table, except for the general, who looks at his medals while standing up.
GENERAL
Good evening your highness, ladies and gentlemen.
We have gathered here today in the middle of the sea and under the light of a thousand
constellations…
He waves his spade and cuts the tail of the seagull as he eats tuna from the plates.


GENERAL
…to save my country from the chains. I’m prepared to offer my life for my
people.
They applaud.
GENERAL
We need faith and dignity, greatness and altruism to give our people peace, justice
and bread.

They applaud again. The seagull sips some wine from a glass and also applauds.
GENERAL
We come back like the Spartans with the emblems...
They cry, applaud and drink wine.
GENERAL
Dawn will find us in the trenches defending our country, who taught us love from
the cradle, with our mother’s tears and the efforts of a dying father. God, Christ
and freedom! Here is a saying of my government: for the country and to the
country.
They applaud. The general searches for his glass to refresh his mouth but the seagull has finished with the wine.
GENERAL
I invite you to follow my comrades. If I go back, kill me. If I die, look for
revenge.
They all hug the general. Fifi and the seagull kiss him in the mouth while the cardinal straightens his crown and gets ready to speak.
CARDENAL
In this night full of faith and hope I want to represent the catholic people of my
country, to tell our leader that we’ll follow him beyond death, if it’s necessary.
They applaud.
CARDINAL
On the twenty seventh of October of the year 1312, the emperor Constantine found
the troops of his rival Magencio twelve kilometres away from Rome. He called
the Christian God while turning his eyes to the sunset, where he saw a luminous cross
with the following words: With this sign you’ll win. He was promoted as Jesus
Christ, God of the armies.
They applaud.
CARDINAL
That’s why at this solemn moment of our lives, we turn our eyes towards God, and
find his words: with the saint cross, we’ll have victory.
Everyone goes mad.
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