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end, and I refused to be quiet about it. I sniffed and kept on going. “Now I know that it really must have been a mistake for that box to have ended up there. No one cared if I received a box of chocolates or not... but why did you do that? I'll never know, and you'll never care. You're disgusting, Guji, and that's all you'll ever be. So don't mistake these tears for sadness because I'm not. I'm glad that I was finally able to say what I've wanted this whole time.”

“Ana, this isn't--”

“You know nothing about me! Nothing!



Without any further interruptions from me, he yelled. “I'm sorry I threw your chocolates on the floor! I'm sorry. I only did that because I knew you would never be willing to take a present like that from someone like me. I know you hate me and I know you'll always hate me, but please, please don't jump... I'm sorry.” He was breathless and I think I was, too. Then he added, “I love you so much. I just...” --he shrugged shamefully-- “I just didn't know how to show it.”

I don't know why I continued to listen to what he had to say, but whatever his words were made out of-- be it insults or onions-- it didn't stop the tears from coming.

“I've seen how beautiful you are when you have your hair up and you're all alone knitting in that empty classroom," he hesitated to say. “But I always sneaked a glance each time before I headed off to practice. You're quiet but I know you're capabilities, I know what you like and what you don't. If getting attention from you meant that I step on the very chocolates I bought you, then I was going to do it. And it worked but I... I didn't know you were this far off the edge, I swear, I didn't know, Ana. I would've stopped a long time ago if only you'd say something once in a while.”

“Get away from me, Guji.” The words itself were much harsher than the actual tone in which I said it.

“Fine, but if you jump I'm jumping too!”

“No, you won't,” I scoffed. He was the prized player of the basketball team and I know Guji loved his place there, as well. Why would he go this far, if this was a joke, just to hurt me?

He smiled weakly. “You won't know that. You'll be dead before my head hits the ground next.” His hair blew in the wind, too, but not once did he break that eye contact. He never did. All around my being I remembered each and every single time Guji had bothered me, and judging from them I would still think that to this day he hated me. But in case he didn't...

“Guji... please tell me you're not joking around,” I sobbed, pulling the hair away from my face. “Because if you are, I think it'd be my last hit from you. I'm so tired... please tell me you're not joking.”

“Shh,” he lulled as he reached out a hand for me to take. “Come down from there so we can talk, alright?”

It's very unimportant how the story ends between Guji and I. But no matter how it ended, I'll never forget the feeling of simplicity drain away from my body when I took his hand, and encircled in his embrace. I'll never forget how my name used to be simple but if you say it whole, it revives the beauty in which my parents named me for.

Anabella.

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Publication Date: 11-01-2009

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