Memoirs Of Aaron Burr, Volume 1 - Matthew L. Davis (top android ebook reader txt) 📗

Chapter IV Pg 28

On The 11Th Of September, 1774, He Again Writes Ogden:--

 

 

I Wrote You Last Thursday, And Enclosed One Of The Songs You Desired,

Which Was All I Could Then Obtain. Miss -----, The Fountain Of Melody,

Furnished Me With It. I Knew That She, And No One Else, Had The Notes

Of The Enclosed Song. I Told Her I Should Be Glad To Copy Them For A

Most Accomplished Young Gentleman In The Jerseys. She Engaged To Bring

Them The First Time She Came In Town, For She Lives About Two Miles

From Here. I This Day Received It, Precisely As You Have It. You May

Depend Upon Its Being The Work Of Her Own Hands. If This Don'T Deserve

An Acrostic, I Don'T Know--Sense, Beauty, Modesty, And Music. Matter

Plenty.

 

 

Pray Tell Me Whether Your Prayers Are Heard, And A Good Old Saint,

Though A Little In Your Way, Is Yet In Heaven. But Remember, Matt.,

You Can Never Be Without Plague, And When One Gets Out Of The Way, A

Worse, Very Often, Supplies Its Place; So, I Tell You Again, Be

Content, And Hope For Better Times.

 

 

I Am Determined Never To Have Any Dealings With Your Friend Cupid

Until I Know Certainly How Matters Will Turn Out With You: For Should

Some Lucky Devil Step In Between My Friend And----, Which Kind Heaven

Grant May Never Be; In Such A Case, I Say, I Would Choose To Be

Untied, And Then, You Know, The Wide World Is Before Us.

 

 

Yours Sincerely,

 

A. Burr.

 

Chapter IV Pg 29

Burr Again Writes Him, Dated

 

 

Litchfield, February 2D, 1775.

 

 

I Sent You A Packet By N. Hazard, And From That Time To This I Have

Not Had The Most Distant Prospect Of Conveying A Letter To You.

However, I Have Written A Number Of Scrawls, The Substance Of Which

You Shall Now Have.

 

 

The Times With Me Are Pretty Much As Usual; Not So Full Of Action As I

Could Wish; And I Find This Propensity To Action Is Very Apt To Lead

Me Into Scrapes. T. B. Has Been Here Since I Wrote You Last; He Came

Very Unexpectedly. You Will Conclude We Had Some Confab About Miss

-----. We Had But Little Private Chat, And The Whole Of That Little

Was About Her. He Would Now And Then Insinuate Slyly What A Clever

Circumstance It Would Be To Have Such A Wife, With Her Fortune.

 

 

T. Burr, [2] By His Kindness To Me, Has Certainly Laid Me Under

Obligations, Which It Would Be The Height Of Ingratitude In Me Ever To

Forget; But I Cannot Conceive It My Duty To Be In The Least Influenced

By These In The Present Case. Were I To Conform To His Inclination, It

Could Give Him Pleasure Or Pain Only As The Consequence Was Good Or

Bad To Me. The Sequel Might Be Such As Would Inevitably Cause Him The

Most Bitter Anguish; And, In All Probability, Would Be Such If I

Should Consult His Fancy Instead Of My Judgment. And Who Can Be A

Judge Of These Consequences But Myself? But Even Supposing Things

Could Be So Situated That, By Gratifying Him, I Should Certainly Be

The Means Of His Enjoying Some Permanent Satisfaction, And Should

Subject Myself To A Bare Probability Of Misery As Permanent, Would It

Not Stagger The Most Generous Soul To Think Of Sacrificing A Whole

Life'S Comfort To The Caprice Of A Friend? But This Is A Case That Can

Never Happen, Unless That Friend Has Some Mean And Selfish Motive,

Such As I Know T. Burr Has Not. I Can Never Believe That Too Great

Deference To The Judgment Of Another, In These Matters, Can Arise From

Any Greatness Of Soul. It Appears To Me The Genuine Offspring Of

Meanness. I Suppose You Are Impatient For My Reply To These

Importunities. I Found My Tongue And Fancy Too Cramped To Say Much.

However, I Rallied My Thoughts And Set Forth, As Well As I Was Able,

The Inconveniences And Uncertainty Attending Such An Affair. I Am

Determined To Be Very Blunt The Next Time The Matter Is Urged.

 

 

I Have Now And Then An Affair Of Petty Gallantry, Which Might

Entertain You If You Were Acquainted With The Different Characters I

Have To Deal With; But, Without That, They Would Be Very Insipid.

 

 

I Have Lately Engaged In A Correspondence Of A Peculiar Nature. I

Write Once, And Sometimes Twice A Week, To A Lady Who Knows Not That

She Ever Received A Line From Me. The Letters, On Both Sides, Are

Mostly Sentimental. Those Of The Lady Are Doubtless Written With More

Sincerity, And Less Reserve, Than If She Knew I Had Any Concern With

Them. Mr. ----- Received A Letter From Miss -----. He Is Very Little

Versed In Letter-Writing, And Engaged, Or Rather Permitted, Me To

Answer It, Not Thinking Thereby To Embark In A Regular Correspondence,

But Supposing The Matter Would Thus End. I Have Had Many Scruples Of

Conscience About This Affair, Though I Really Entered Into It Not With

Any Sinister View, But Purely To Oblige----. I Should Be Glad To Know

Your Opinion Of It. You Will Readily Observe The Advantage I Have Over

-----. He Is Of An Unsuspicious Make, And This Gives Me An Opportunity

(If I Had Any Inclination) To Insert Things Which Might Draw From Her

Secrets She Would Choose I Should Be Ignorant Of. But I Would Suffer

Crucifixion Rather Than Be Guilty Of Such An Unparalleled Meanness. On

The Contrary, I Have Carefully Avoided Saying Any Thing Which Might

Have The Least Tendency To Make Her Write What She Would Be Unwilling

I Should See.

 

 

Adieu.

 

 

A. Burr.

Chapter IV Pg 30

On The 12Th Of March, 1775, Burr Writes Ogden:--

 

 

I Have Received Your And Aaron'S [3] Letters. I Was A Little

Disappointed That You Did Not Send An Acrostic; But I Still Entertain

Some Secret Hope That The Muse (Who, You Say, Has Taken Her Flight)

Will Shortly Return, And, By A New And Stricter Intimacy, More Than

Repay The Pains Of This Momentary Absence. Your Happiness, Matt., Is

Really Almost The Only Present Thing I Can Contemplate With Any

Satisfaction; Though I, Like Other Fools, View Futurity With

Partiality Enough To Make It Very Desirable; But I Must First Throw

Reason Aside, And Leave Fancy Uncontrolled. In Some Of These Happy

Freaks I Have Endeavoured To Take As Agreeable A Sleigh-Ride As You

Had To Goshen; But I Find It Impracticable, Unless You Will Make One

Of The Party; For My Imagination, When Most Romantic, Is Not Lively Or

Delusive Enough To Paint An Object That Can, In My Eyes, Atone For

Your Absence. From This You Will Conclude That The News You Heard Of

Me At Princeton Is Groundless. It Is So Far From Being True, That

Scarce Two Persons Can Fix On The Same Lady To Tease Me With. However,

I Would Not Have You Think That This Diversity Of Opinion Arises From

The Volatility Of My Constitution, Or That I Am In Love With Every New

Or Pretty Face I See. But, I Hope, You Know Me Too Well To Need A

Caution Of This Nature. I Am Very Glad To Hear Of -----'S Downfall.

But, With All That Fellow'S Low-Lived Actions, I Don'T More Sincerely

Despise Him Than I Do Certain Other Narrow-Hearted Scoundrels You Have

Among You. Mean As He Is, He Appears To Me To Have (Or Rather To Have

Had) More Of Something At Bottom That Bordered On Honour, Than Some

Who Will Pass Through Life Respected By Many. I Say This, Not So Much

To Raise Him Above The Common Standard Of D--Ls, As To Sink Them Below

It. My Idea Of A D--L Is Composed More Of Malice Than Of Meanness.

 

 

Since I Commenced This Letter I Have Passed Through A Scene Entirely

New. Now, As Novelty Is The Chief And Almost Only Ingredient Of

Happiness Here Below, You'Ll Fancy I Have Had Some Lucky Turn. I Think

It Quite The Reverse, I Assure You. I Have Serious Thoughts Of Leaving

The Matter Here, That You May Be On The Rack Of Curiosity For A Month

Or So. Would Not This Be Truly Satanic? What Would Be Your Conjectures

In Such A Case? The First, I _Guess_, That I Was Sadly In Love, And

Had Met With Some Mortifying Rebuff.

 

 

What Would You Say If I Should Tell You That ----- Had Absolutely

Professed Love For Me? Now I Can See You With Both Hands Up--Eyes And

Mouth Wide Open; But Don'T Be Over Scrupulous. Trust Me, I Tell You

The Whole Truth. I Cannot At Present Give You Any Further Particulars

About The Matter, Than That I Felt Foolish Enough, And Gave As

Cautious A Turn To It As I Could, For Which I Am Destined To Suffer

Her Future Hostility.

 

 

Last Week I Received A Letter From T. Edwards, Which I Fear May Prove

Fatal To The Dear Project Of The 15Th Of April. He Intends To Be

Hereabout The Middle Of That Month. Supposing He Should Come Here The

13Th Of April, What Could I Do? Run Off And Leave Him? Observe The

Uncertainty Of All Sublunary Things. I, Who A Few Months Ago Was As

Uncontrolled In My Motions As The Lawless Meteors, Am Now (Sad

Reverse!) At The Beck Of A Person Forty Miles Off. But All This

Lamentation, If Well Considered, Is Entirely Groundless, For (_Between

You And Me_) I Intend To See You At Elizabethtown This Spring. But

Even Supposing I Should Fail In This--Where Is This Sad Reverse Of

Fortune?--This Lamentable Change? Is It Not A Very Easy Matter To Fix

On Another Time, And Write You Word By T. Edwards?

 

 

I Have Struck Up A Correspondence With J. Bellamy (Son To The Famous

Divine Of That Name). He Has Very Lately Settled In The Practice Of

The Law At Norwich, A Place About Seventy Miles S. E. Of This. He Is

One Of The Cleverest Fellows I Have To Deal With. Sensible, A Person

Of Real Humour, And Is An Excellent Judge Of Mankind, Though He Has

Not Had Opportunity Of Seeing Much Of The World. Adieu.

 

 

A. Burr.

Chapter IV Pg 31